OT: I quit drinking alcohol

[old_fat_and_slow]

OP, thanks for stopping drinking. Now there is more left for me!

[93KgBike]

Congrats! Posted a similar experience a year or two ago, and can agree whole-heartedly that I feel 100% better too.

Keep it up!

[XXtwindad]

Originally Posted by grateful

I highly recommend that you suggest your friend read "This Naked Mind"

Your friend mileage may vary and getting him/her to read it will be the challenge but this book was very beneficial to me.

See the following:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VCJh_eSGNc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FOVGLV7GtOE

I hope that helps.

One of my biggest fears was how do I have fun without alcohol. I am not talking riding a bike or driving a new BMW. I am talking dinner, parties, etc.

The unconscious conditioning discussed in this book was real eye opening.

Good luck, alcohol is a killer!

Hey grateful -

Thx for the response. Much appreciated. As I said, I was going to post a thread myself on the topic seeking advice.

If I can get your feedback (or anyone else's) who might've gone through a similar situation with someone they really cared about.

I have a dual role in my friend's life. He also relies on my for his physical well-being. When he tells me he's "cutting back" to two or three drinks a night, do I accept that as a sign of progress, or do I call BS and say that, as someone with an addiction, he has to go cold turkey. I have no personal experience with this addiction and, therefore, have no idea on how to frame things.

[grateful]

You know, the fight was much easier than I anticipated. What was enormously difficult for me was deciding to get into the fight.

Originally Posted by Mzilliox

great job, the less we poison ourselves, the better our bodies do.

less poison, more vitamins! win win.

ive been trying to drink more, ive got some currency in the bank for body health, i need a mental break lately.

jokes aside, this is a tough fight, good on ya

[bob heinatz]

Grateful,
Great job! The body certainly adjusts when we take better care of ourselves.

[zambenini]

Love this thread. Good mojo here. I go in seasons, I guess... some more, some less, some not at all. I will say I feel best about alcohol when I either don't drink it, or use my 1/1/1 rule ... one beer/1hrs of mountain bike riding / 1week ... i.e. if I ride a MTB 4 hours in a week, that's four beers that week. I don't always adhere to it the rest of the time, but I also usually have a two-unit at a time limit. That's just cuz I'm 35 now.

I pretty much quit buying beer for home consumption unless "my brand" is on sale and I have been physically active a lot (Sierra Nevada Pale Ale - ubiquitous, not too pretentious, but still actually good). It's gotta be on sale. But I'm cheap.

This thread is a good reminder how good life feels without.

[skiezo]

Great choice to be pro active in your own healthcare,No one else will.

[MattTuck]

I wonder how much of the physiological improvement was the result of eliminating the ethanol compared to eliminating the sugars that are also in wine.

Good job grateful! Unfortunately, I don't think my 1 or 2 glasses of wine a month are what's keeping me heavy.

[grateful]

I am going to write my personal story. Please respond with your thoughts in a constructive manner. I will support this thread being closed if it is not used for open dialog and that would be a shame.

If you believe in statistics a great number of alcoholics are members of this forum. This is to tell them what I experienced with added some context. I HOPE IT HELPS.

I come from what I would consider the typical middle class from my time period. You know, the one always shown on TV.

My parents owned a small business. I had a dog. I had a bike. For those of you who grew up when I did Atari didn't begin to fight with the bike for our attentions until the early teens.

I played soccer, football, basketball and was a competitive swimmer.

I didn’t drink until my senior year.

Off to college. I began to love to drink in excess. I didn't drink every day. When I did (every Friday/Saturday) I was with friends who did the same. Never Sunday. I never drank on Sunday so that I was recovered for Monday. DWI, outpatient therapy, AA all followed.

A few very close friends left the binge drinking behind at some point and we lost touch.

Some friends quit drinking. I envied them. We lost touch.

But I was not ready to fight.

Once married, the pattern above continued only a couple of glasses of wine a night was added to the schedule. Please keep in mind that a couple glasses of wine equaled 3/4 of a bottle. Big glasses help you ignore the fact that your alcoholism is growing worse because everyone has two glasses a wine with dinner.

My two glass limit escalated to three glasses a night. This required I purchase two bottles instead of one. This had the added benefit of being able disguise my consumption because there were always ½ full bottles of wine floating around.

This became two bottles of wine nightly.

My wife prefers Vodka. She does not currently have a problem with alcohol but if she has a drink it is a vodka soda.

I began to take pulls off her vodka. When no one was looking.

I am now Sober.

Alcohol rarely got in the way of my professional career. I am and have always been gainfully employed. While it certainly had non-desirable affects (especially Monday’s) I have remained productive. Hangovers were not an issue. Sleep was.

The biggest fear for me prior to deciding to enter the fight was how do I enjoy life without alcohol. I am not kidding. Nobody on that beach you see on TV having the time of their life is sipping a bottled water

As I have said elsewhere, the fight for me was remarkably easy and quickly my body began to compensate for the lack of alcohol.

Thoughts?

Brad

Originally Posted by XXtwindad

Hey grateful -

Thanks for the response. Much appreciated. As I said, I was going to post a thread myself on the topic seeking advice.

If I can get your feedback (or anyone else's) who might've gone through a similar situation with someone they really cared about.

I have a dual role in my friend's life. He also relies on my for his physical well-being. When he tells me he's "cutting back" to two or three drinks a night, do I accept that as a sign of progress, or do I call BS and say that, as someone with an addiction, he has to go cold turkey. I have no personal experience with this addiction and, therefore, have no idea on how to frame things.

[grateful]

I had to go cold turkey. i would easily go a night or two without alcohol. i could even have just a glass. What I couldn't do was continue that control with any consistency. A binge was always coming.

A sign of alcoholism is controlling/cutting back your drinking. Non-alcoholics don't typically speak of limiting, cutting down, etc. as they don't have anything out of control to control. If you have to control you are eventually going to lose.

Originally Posted by XXtwindad

Hey grateful -

Thx for the response. Much appreciated. As I said, I was going to post a thread myself on the topic seeking advice.

If I can get your feedback (or anyone else's) who might've gone through a similar situation with someone they really cared about.

I have a dual role in my friend's life. He also relies on my for his physical well-being. When he tells me he's "cutting back" to two or three drinks a night, do I accept that as a sign of progress, or do I call BS and say that, as someone with an addiction, he has to go cold turkey. I have no personal experience with this addiction and, therefore, have no idea on how to frame things.

[Drmojo]

many thanks for your brutal honesty. I too have battled demon rum-and often lost in spectacular fashion. Today I am winning and grateful.
one breath at a time my brother!
And everyone has their own path-no need for superstition to stay clean and dry

[XXtwindad]

Originally Posted by grateful

I had to go cold turkey. i would easily go a night or two without alcohol. i could even have just a glass. What I couldn't do was continue that control with any consistency. A binge was always coming.

A sign of alcoholism is controlling/cutting back your drinking. Non-alcoholics don't typically speak of limiting, cutting down, etc. as they don't have anything out of control to control. If you have to control you are eventually going to lose.

Thanks for sharing your story. Very compelling and helpful. And thanks for your advice on my question. Really dreading this. I don't think I'm being a good friend unless I'm brutally honest. It might cost both my personal and professional relationship with him, but otherwise I feel like I'm complicit in the lying.

[grateful]

This was for sale but with the money I am saving I decided to build it. If anyone has a nice set of 2014 Record 11 Speed levers they would be willing to part with i could finish her up!

Originally Posted by makoti

Congrats on the health improvements & I hope all of this sticks for you. Have you bothered to figure up the financial gain involved in this? Two bottles a night, even if it was $2 Chuck, that's going to be a lot of available bike money.

[stackie]

Grateful,

Thanks for starting this thread and your honest posts.

Your statements about the hard part being the decision to begin the fight resonate with me. I’m going through similar thought processes myself at this moment. Eg, I like my wine with dinner..., a bottle between wife and I is ok..., I don’t drink when I’m on call..., I’m ok. It’s all very easy to just normalize your consumption in the ways that you described. But, there’s always a trade off.

XXtwindad. You need to call your friend on it. If you care, you’ll call him on it. I recently had to ask one my colleagues if they were using narcs. He was shocked. I said I’m asking because I care. He gave me random test results from his other workplace.

Thanks again,


Jon

[grateful]

He will hear you. If he is ready to make the change he will listen.

I am going to recommend The Naked Mind book once again.

When I began to read her book I was shocked how close her story was to mine.

Of note, the beginning of the book doesn't come out and say you need to quit totally. Important because it helps get the person to begin reading. While that changes as the book continues it helps with that initial fear that you have to stop completely.

For me that was important.

Originally Posted by XXtwindad

Thanks for sharing your story. Very compelling and helpful. And thanks for your advice on my question. Really dreading this. I don't think I'm being a good friend unless I'm brutally honest. It might cost both my personal and professional relationship with him, but otherwise I feel like I'm complicit in the lying.