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The New Style Stealth Roadie
1. Has always been messenger cool while actually not being acquainted with any working bike messengers.
2. Loves $5 cups of coffee. 3. Loves beers you'll hear about in 5 years. 4. His first piece of technical cycling apparel was a vintage wool cycling jersey. 5. Wears Rapha on at least 75% of his rides, yet is worried that it's jumped the shark. It troubles him greatly. 6. Thinks steel is real, rocks a Columbus cycling cap, rides a Tarmac. 7. Lusts for a Vanilla, Baum, Firefly, Sachs, Peg, Speedvagen, but would still secretly love his Tarmac more, even if he were given one of those porn-worthy alloy bikes. 8. Doesn't race. Is disdainful of bike racers and their self-serious training. This attitude leads him to spend 90% of his riding climbing. 9. Only likes to go fast if gravity does 90% of the work for him. 10. Takes many, many photos on his rides. 11. Races CX because, you know, it's fun and you get to act goofy. 12. Is a member of a CX team with a funny name. 13. Loves Campy, rides Red. Has this creature migrated to your region? Last edited by beeatnik; 02-18-2012 at 12:22 PM. |
#2
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#8 is in direct conflict with #11
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#3
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Nah, that's the point. It's okay to new breed cause it is cross. It's a beer and mud festival, not a race to his 'new breed'.
Very funny, beetnik, thanks! |
#4
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Quote:
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#5
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haha, i secretly fall into a few of those categories.
good laugh, thanks
__________________
http://less-than-epic.blogspot.com/ |
#6
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you forgot the body piercing or tattoo.
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#7
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Quote:
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#8
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Hipsters like to make fun of other hipsters, it's like laughing at yourself while watching Portlandia... so how many of those are you guilty of Beetnik?
I agree with Aaron O 100%, just watch yourself & MYOB |
#9
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good post, I like it!
__________________
Be the Reason Others Succeed |
#10
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kinda describes me... not bad
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#11
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Pretty common in the Bay Area... although "Cross" could easily be replaced with "Randonneur"
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#12
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The list omitted the most important features of a messenger cyclist: facial hair, body jewelry, and tattoos. Oh, also riding in wool knickers and non-prescription glasses and shopping at Whole Foods
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#13
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Forgot the tats and elaborate facial hair
Also, forgot to mention that their holy trinity is Merckx, Coppi and Pantani.
Anyway, I'm glad you guys got the humor. I actually like seeing these cats on the road and was wondering if they've migrated outside of SF, NY, LA, Austin, Seattle and Portland. Last edited by beeatnik; 02-18-2012 at 01:11 PM. |
#14
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1. Has always been messenger cool while actually not being acquainted with any working bike messengers.
Haven’t a clue what messenger cool means; never been cool anywhere else so I think I escape that. On the other hand Sacha White did spend a few nights at my house; not sure if that’s good or not but he was a messenger once. 2. Loves $5 cups of coffee. You’re kidding, right! 5$ for a coffee. Good thing there’s no inflation stateside. 3. Loves beers you'll hear about in 5 years. I’d read that high speed connections in the states are pretty slow but come on, 5 years worth of slowness! Or is that how long the lawsuit against the beer for whatever reason takes. 4. His first piece of technical cycling apparel was a vintage wool cycling jersey. Oops, got me there. Then again it was kind of a Henry Ford affair, you know, any color as long as it’s black. 5. Wears Rapha on at least 75% of his rides, yet is worried that it's jumped the shark. It troubles him greatly. Now I know I’m glad I can’t afford Rapha (admitting otherwise I’d surely be guilty here). It’s that jumped the shark deal that thows me off. Jump the shark? 6. Thinks steel is real, rocks a Columbus cycling cap, rides a Tarmac. What’s a Tarmac? For sure steel is real, just less real than ti. I mean with ti you don’t even need to ride! 7. Lusts for a Vanilla, Baum, Firefly, Sachs, Peg, Speedvagen, but would still secretly love his Tarmac more, even if he were given one of those porn-worthy alloy bikes. Uh, what’s a Tarmac? Those women have some strange names to be lusting after. 8. Doesn't race. Is disdainful of bike racers and their self-serious training. This attitude leads him to spend 90% of his riding climbing. At last I’ve discovered why I’m always going up. Been wondering for years. 9. Only likes to go fast if gravity does 90% of the work for him. Hey, give me a break, my big gear is a 50-12; gravity is stronger than I am. 10. Takes many, many photos on his rides. Oops, got me there, big time. 11. Races CX because, you know, it's fun and you get to act goofy. CX = fun = goofy ? Sounds okay to me. 12. Is a member of a CX team with a funny name. Member? Like an arm or a leg? 13. Loves Campy, rides Red. What’s red? |
#15
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Awesome rebuttal
^Pour overs are $5 at Intelligentsia. When it comes to beers, regular guys are slow to try new stuff. My brother just discovered Stella. He calls it fancy beer. As for the rest, these guys:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/raphacc/2965566814/ |
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