Moved from SD to BOS- Should I go Gravel?

[Jpalomba]

Hi all,

New to posting here but looking for advice. I am from MA and just finished up grad school in San Diego and am now back in Boston. I have ridden most road and some gravel over the last 10 or so years. Partially tired of my aggressive road geo and partially itching for a new bike, I am thinking of getting a gravel bike that I can ride on road and trails. Seems too good to be true. I was hoping for some advice based on some thoughts:

Is custom steel the way to go or too heavy?
Is it really any fun to ride a gravel bike with road wheels on road (not for racing or anything but still 30-50 mile rides)
Do I need two sets of wheels for on and off road?
If I want disc brakes, Sram, and 1x11 what’s a reasonable price range?
Is there any point in looking used?

Not in any rush to buy, still need to save up, just dreaming.

Thanks!