Know the rules The Paceline Forum Builder's Spotlight


Go Back   The Paceline Forum > General Discussion

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #61  
Old 11-26-2020, 02:40 AM
vqdriver's Avatar
vqdriver vqdriver is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: I don't trust air I can't see
Posts: 6,010
This is upsetting on different levels, but also because it occurred at op's home which feels like a violation of refuge. Thats another level of hurt.
Reply With Quote
  #62  
Old 11-26-2020, 07:37 AM
oldpotatoe's Avatar
oldpotatoe oldpotatoe is offline
Proud Grandpa
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Republic of Boulder, USA
Posts: 40,290
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave B View Post
Yep, looking into things, but people come first. I am not without a bike. I have plenty, just cross and of course Lance specific. Riding is not a problem, just crappy situation. This was more of a therapeutic vent and maybe down the line I will be able to recoup some losses, but big picture it will be fine. Hey I have several full campy groups to work with, so frames and forks will happen in time. No rush and while I am gutted that what I had cannot be used to obtain stuff, trust me, I am no way out of opportunities. I have an old mtb frame I bought from a pal I still need to build up and with that project almost ready to go, All will work out.

Like I said, people are hurting world wide and that includes my family. I have messed up too many friendships in the past to not look at this as a different way of seeing what is worth being upset about. I think I just needed to vent and honestly, only cyclists would understand this type of issue. Trust me it wasn’t only bikes, there are many more important ( to our little family) then Dad’s bikes.

This year has shown me tremendous things, not all good, not all bad.
Yup, in my opinion, the bike and house smashing was the symptom of a real issue with your relative and that's more important than bike or house 'stuff'.

Good on you to try to help this person rather than just go 'high order' and try to punish and hurt them, even more. Hope that person has an avenue for help. Hope that person recognizes that he is in NEED of help.
Quote:
A mentally ill person might break stuff, but only a criminal would come maliciously with a hacksaw to cut carbon bike frames in half.
Many, many mentally ill people commit crimes because they are mentally ill.
The extent of his actions, from my distant chair, seems like the person has mental health issues..isn't a 'criminal'...destroying a relatives house and bikes..
__________________
Chisholm's Custom Wheels
Qui Si Parla Campagnolo

Last edited by oldpotatoe; 11-26-2020 at 07:41 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #63  
Old 11-26-2020, 07:43 AM
oldpotatoe's Avatar
oldpotatoe oldpotatoe is offline
Proud Grandpa
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Republic of Boulder, USA
Posts: 40,290
Quote:
Originally Posted by weisan View Post
This is a super complex situation with more than one possible response.

I hope for the best for all parties involved.

I would just say one thing.

Don't just focus everything on that one family member. Try and look at it from multiple angles and perspectives, and realize that there might be more than one area or person of dysfunction in the big picture.
Sounds like Dave B is doing just that. Otherwise he would just call the police and have him arrested.
__________________
Chisholm's Custom Wheels
Qui Si Parla Campagnolo
Reply With Quote
  #64  
Old 11-26-2020, 08:04 AM
Dave B's Avatar
Dave B Dave B is offline
Ex-Mr.President
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: NE of Indianapolis
Posts: 5,681
I appreciate the many responses and some are coming from places I can understand and maybe a few I just see differently.

I shared what I wanted to as more details aren’t necessary outside of my world. I admit there is more info that if shared might help some understand more or whatever that goal would be. I do not mean to be coy, evocative, or have no desire to be an agitator.

This individual is young enough that, when assessing all options to me, I do not want their life or future ruined by this. That is how I am made and probably a product of what I do. I don’t choose to share options as I don’t wish to alter my course, so please know lack of info is, to me, a mute point.

This individual is now getting help and the people around them are professional, trained, and more capable to help then I think a law enforcement route could provide. This is what I CHOSE TO DO as it is what is best for the person, not just me. I have spent a lot of time investing myself into this person, so again, it was My Choice. I understand many of you might disagree and I can accept that.

With that said, yes I am pissed at what we lost regarding material things, but I had enough ability to replace what was needed to. Everything else can be sorted out in time, of which I have plenty. I imagine the parents will help and they can financially, but I made healing and support priority number one.

My only intent in this thread was to vent, something that might seem strange or even selfish, but I didn’t know where else to do so as this place is the only one in my world where bikes or the type/quality of bikes we love are understood. Honestly if that is poor form the mods have my permission to delete this thread post haste. I simply felt comfortable enough here with the folks who have been around to remember the old handle I switched from...Mr. President.

Thank you to all who have commented. I read all comments and understand the different points.

Happy Thanksgiving to all who partake and I hope you all stay safe and healthy!

Dave
Reply With Quote
  #65  
Old 11-26-2020, 09:31 AM
OtayBW OtayBW is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: NoBaltoCo
Posts: 5,630
^
Well, sounds like you have things in pretty good perspective, so good on you.
Have a good holiday.
__________________
“A bicycle is not a sofa”
-- Dario Pegoretti
Reply With Quote
  #66  
Old 11-26-2020, 10:02 AM
roguedog roguedog is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 2,130
Have Dave B, Happy Tday to you.

I have nothing to add other than that. Just wanted to wish you and yours a happy holiday and I think about Thanksgiving.
Reply With Quote
  #67  
Old 11-26-2020, 10:32 AM
AJM100 AJM100 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 712
In many states there are ways to utilize/petition the court system for civil commitments involving mental health issues without law enforcement involvement. They are usually voluntary commitments, but it may be a way for you to get the individual's behavioral patterns on an official court record (perhaps it could be sealed too) that would aide in making an insurance claim. Consult an attorney who specializes in mental health issues in your state. There is definitely a work around.

All that said, best of luck. These issues are complex and with no easy solution. 2021 can't come soon enough. Cheers.
Reply With Quote
  #68  
Old 11-26-2020, 10:46 AM
gemship gemship is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 2,012
Quote:
Originally Posted by ridethecliche View Post
Big difference between the bolded and insinuating that someone that owns a few bikes but couldn't afford to replace them outright is living far outside their means. That entire post was a victim blaming gaslight fest and should be called out as such.
Well it seems like read a whole lot more into Benb's stated reply than myself. I thought he gave some well warranted solid advice in that, it would be wise to insure the bikes as they are very expensive. I don't think he came across as so condescending and frankly it's a honest remark given that the OP reached out to the community which pretty much opens the door to the best advice we can give...and maybe I'm just a bit curious but I wonder what the OP did exactly to piss off someone to target his bike collection and not much more. Not saying it's right but I do believe in two sides to the story.
Reply With Quote
  #69  
Old 11-26-2020, 11:20 AM
ridethecliche ridethecliche is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 800
It is what it is.

Happy thanksgiving to you all!
Reply With Quote
  #70  
Old 11-26-2020, 12:54 PM
Tickdoc's Avatar
Tickdoc Tickdoc is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2015
Location: TUL
Posts: 4,750
Dang, Dave, Just now reading this and wow, what a sad tale. Wouldn’t believe it in any other year but this one. Glad YOU and your fam are ok. F%ck the bikes, they are just things. I can’t imagine what I would do in this situation, but I doubt I would be as magnanimous as you are. We’ve all suffered loss in one way or another and thank goodness you are safe.

You know many here will help you with anything you need, myself included. Strip and sell some parts and rebuild what you truly need and/or miss? Sounds like a therapeutic way to deal with this tragedy to me.

Thanks for sharing and best wishes moving forward.

Oh, and happy thanksgiving.
__________________
♦️♠️
♣️♥️
Reply With Quote
  #71  
Old 11-26-2020, 05:42 PM
FriarQuade FriarQuade is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: BendOR
Posts: 391
That sucks a lot.

What size road bike do you ride?
__________________
Abbey Bike Tools
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:39 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2021, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.