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Old 02-23-2020, 03:42 PM
XXtwindad XXtwindad is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kirk007 View Post
Women writing about the male adolescent experience, I always take it with a grain of salt as they never live it. And it"s so much more complicated than blaming it on enduring *male" culture. The author never considers the biological component. I still smile when I think of my well intended politically correct neighbor, a very smart woman ER doctor, who was at her wits end because despite her best efforts in toy selection and everything else, her 4 year old son turned everything into a weapon of aggression when playing. She asked me why, I said "boy."

And I agree with BigBill and Houston re how hard it is to parent a boy. For me it was a crazy mix of letting go of expectations, offering guidance when Ian was open to it, being present during hard times which included 3 suicides of schoolmates, establishing a hard edge when absolutely necessary for safety, and grudgingly accepting that his peers had as much or more influence than I did, and hoping like hell that all the prior years of love would see him through those crazy years of 14-20.

Hardest job ever, and you never stop being a parent.

Is the larger context unwoke men? I think the larger context is the decay and loss of good education and the growing culture where honor, honesty, fair play, tolerance, concern for others, humans and all the other species, is losing sway to a culture where cheating and dishonesty, fear of others and narcissism is the plat du jour exhibited by way to many "adults." I don't think it's a male - female problem (although yes that"s part of it) rather it's a human problem. I also think, because the other option is unacceptable, that this wave too will pass.

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Yes. And yes, but ...

One of the best perks in my former life as journalist was being granted a "passport" into other people's lives. It was a real gift, and the aspect of journalism I miss the most.

Good writers can navigate terrains and cultures not inherently their own with both a fresh perspective and nuance. I had a college buddy that was Black and gay who wrote a fantastic essay on the (largely white) Pacific Heights Debutante scene. He just killed it. He got inside the "skin" of the story and wrote a great piece.

If a cultural landscape is not your own, extra caution is needed before making sweeping declarations. This writer was seemingly oblivious to that.
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