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PanTerra
04-19-2005, 04:40 PM
"You Might be a Cyclist if."....

1. You tell a family of 5 in a crowded mall to 'hold their line.'
2. Your spouse says 'If you buy another bike I'm going to leave you'
and you think 'I guess I'm going to miss him/her.'
3. You have more water bottles than you have drinking glasses.
4. You have more cycling jerseys than work shirts.
5. Your cycling jersey IS your work shirt.
6. Your legs are smoother than your wifes.
7. The nicest pair of shoes you own have cleats in the soles.
8. You have defined the 8 stages of roadkill decomposition through
daily observation.
9. You are walking along a street and you signal left.
10.You go to your local store on a bike.
11.You sulk when in cars, on hot days.
12.You sulk when in cars, on cold, windy, snowy days.
13.You get withdrawal symptoms if off the bike for more than a day.
14.When anybody mentions distance you immediately think of how long
it would take to cycle it.
15.You point at pot holes, but you ! are driving in your car alone.
16.While driving your car you yell at your passenger 'Car back' as a
vehicle approaches from behind.
17.Your bike is worth more than your car and the 2 tires on your
bike costyou more than the 4 tires on your car.
18.You put more miles on your bike than your car.
19.Your hands have a strange tan that looks remarkably similar to
thepattern on your cycling gloves.
20.Weather forecasts can be broken down into 2 categories: good
biking weather, bad biking weather.
21.You put your bicycle in your car, and the value of the total
package increases by a factor of 4 (or better).
22.As you are driving down the road in your car, you find yourself
'sprinting' for city limit signs and taking note of them so that on
the next group ride, you will be one up on everyone else.
23.You spend 2X the money on cycling wear that you do work clothes.
24.You can tell your partner with a straight face that it's too
hot to mow the lawn , then bike off for a century.
25.You dream of winning the lottery and the first thing you think of
is how many/which bikes can I buy?
26.You buy a car based on whether or not a bike will fit in the
trunk/back, with the rear seat folded down.
27.You open your car window and yell out 'On your left' when passing
cars on the freeway.
28.You have not one, not two, but three permanent chain ring scars
on your right calf.
29.Your bike sleeps with you in the living or bedroom.
30.You wear a heart rate monitor during sex.
31.You check out all other guys/girls legs to see if they are better
than yours.
32.Your spouse can't take it anymore and takes up cycling.
33.You wonder why a $500 bike has 24 gears, while a $20,000
car or truck only has 4.
34.You crash...and insist on getting to the bike shop to have your
bike checked out BEFORE going to the hospital.
35.You can't seem to get to work before 8:30am, but you don't have
a problem meeting your buddies at 5:30am for a ride.

M_A_Martin
04-19-2005, 04:46 PM
What's a "mall"?


I can find everything I need at my local bike shop.

RichMc
04-19-2005, 05:43 PM
Do you have to answer every qualifier in the affirmative to pass? :banana:

RABikes2
04-19-2005, 07:31 PM
[QUOTE=PanTerra]"You Might be a Cyclist if."....

Funny...I understood, agreed, and have done every one on the list; except #30 :no: :no:

I agree w/ Mary Ann...what's a mall? And #29, well, hell yes my bike lives in my living room; where else would it stay?!?!

Brons2
04-19-2005, 07:42 PM
35 is funny, I was just thinking the other day, that I can't be bothered to get to work before 9 or so, but getting to a club ride before 7 gets me into action.

How about:

36. You stop going out on Friday and Saturday nights with your friends because you have/want to get up and ride in the morning.

M_A_Martin
04-19-2005, 08:39 PM
And I don't understand #20, I think it must be incorrect...

All weather is good biking weather


I can't say I haven't done #30...it wasn't intentional...honest.