Doc Austin
10-30-2004, 08:32 PM
You can find comedy anywhere if you look hard enough, but some things are just so obviously funny that it is painful.
OK, there is a story currently circulating the south eastern US high end bicycle shops that originated right here in my home town. It is an urban legend that everyone likes to tell and insert themselves into the story, but it really happened to me . Don't believe anyone who tells you this story, and if you go into a bike shop, someone will.
I ride Serottas. I love the way they feel, they way they turn into a corner, take a set a dig in. I love how I can feel the road and the front tire losing grip in my hands. I love feeling the rear getting ready to break away in the seat of my shorts. I love the way the petals feed back the vibration of the rear tire scratching for grip when I grunt up a hill. My Serottas talk to me when I ride them. I love them. I don't have very many fine things because I am a simple man, but I could not live without these bicycles.
The company is so rock solid that they have treated me like gold. I was lucky on my first one because I got it with only 100 miles on it and paid about half price, Otherwise I couldn't have afforded it. It has 26,000 miles on it and it has been the finest thing I have ever owned. I love Porsches and have longed to own another one for years, but once I got this bike, I don't even care anymore.
My wonderful Aunt Gerry knew of my passion for cycling and when she passed on she left me some money with specific instructions to buy the best bike the shop had, so there was just no choice. I ordered a Serotta legend TI. It takes about six weeks to get it because they custom build it to fit your body. A Serotta is about the very finest bike you can get.
IMHO, of course.
My neighbor from two doors down had a horrible motocross accident that left him with nerve damage and some partial paralysis. Leonard is a tough cookie, so he fought his way through the recovery process and is now leading a pretty normal life except he deals with alot of pain all the time. He is so good natured that you can't tell though.
I encouraged him to try cycling as soon as he was able to re-establish a normal walk. He still has a little limp, but all things considered, he gets around really well and is independant as could be.
Leonard sometimes says he hates being a "cripple," but I tell him he is just slow and clumsy. He always gets a giggle out of that because he is a good sport. Everyone who knows Leonard is extremely proud of him because he was told he would never walk again at all. But any weekend you can see Leonard pulling the transmittion out of a friend's car or doing a valve job. He never stops moving.
Eventually, I got him riding. He had a tough time at first, but dealing with tough problems is routine for Leonard. Considering he really only has one good leg, he rides really well, and loves it. There are times I have to push hard to keep up with him.
Leonard's bike was junk though. He didn't want to spend alot of money until he was sure he could ride, but he was going great and deserved something really fast. Eventually we found him a nice used one and he reconditioned it to where it works really well. Leonard likes projects, so a new one would have been too easy for him.
And here is where everyone picks up the story and tries to make it their own. Once again, never believe anyone who tells you this story. This happened to me.
We were in a bike shop during the manufacture's "Super Sale" when all the manufacturers blow out all the end of year and overstock stuff. The shop was absolutely packed and one of the guys who worked at the shop (who sold me my bikes) was having to work Leonard and another guy at the same time.
And this other guy was an obnoxious blowhard.
He went on and on and on about how his Brand X was the greatest thing like it was the Taj Mahal or something. And his Brand X was this and his Brand X was that and the other. I don't know why he was shopping for a bike if the Brand X was that wonderful, but there he was, and making a pain out of himself.
Unlike my internet personna, I am a jovial, gentle and joyful man, so I just nodded and agreed that Brand X are indeed very nice, because they are. But to get real, there is nothing like a Serotta, at least not in my book. I don't think a Brand X is even close. It's like comparing a Ferrari to a Yugo. IMHO, of course.
He finally asks me what I ride and I really didn't want to say anything. I'm sort of cornered, really. He kept on until I just couldn't get out of answering the question. I tried to say it as contritely as possible because I don't like to burst people's bubble, but I was trapped. "'Right now I have a Serotta CSI."
And leonard adds "Yeah, until your Legend TI comes in."
The guy looked like someone had kicked him in the nads. He took a couple of deep, deep breaths, turned red and sneers at me saying "Yeah, sure you do."
Leonard just looked at me and erupted in hysterical laughter. He had to sit down on the floor right where he was standing. The salesman literally had tears streaming down his face and finally excused himself, went to the repair department and told the story. We could hear them all the way across the building and they were howling. All of this with about fifty oblivious people standing around and wondering why everyone else was acting so insane.
The blowhard had made his own bed, so all that was left for him to do was slink out. I heard the guy eventually came back and actually bought a Serotta. I imagine he is in some bike shop now saying "My Serotta......."
Now I can't go into the bike shop and make a statement of any kind without someone saying to me "Yeah, sure you do."
Anyway, the story is legendary and has worked it's way around all the bike shops down here. Pinarella owners tell the story like it happened to them and so do LeMond owners. Almost every shop that has high end bicycles has a rider telling this story like it happened to him. I'm sure it will work it's way up to where you are soon.
OK, there is a story currently circulating the south eastern US high end bicycle shops that originated right here in my home town. It is an urban legend that everyone likes to tell and insert themselves into the story, but it really happened to me . Don't believe anyone who tells you this story, and if you go into a bike shop, someone will.
I ride Serottas. I love the way they feel, they way they turn into a corner, take a set a dig in. I love how I can feel the road and the front tire losing grip in my hands. I love feeling the rear getting ready to break away in the seat of my shorts. I love the way the petals feed back the vibration of the rear tire scratching for grip when I grunt up a hill. My Serottas talk to me when I ride them. I love them. I don't have very many fine things because I am a simple man, but I could not live without these bicycles.
The company is so rock solid that they have treated me like gold. I was lucky on my first one because I got it with only 100 miles on it and paid about half price, Otherwise I couldn't have afforded it. It has 26,000 miles on it and it has been the finest thing I have ever owned. I love Porsches and have longed to own another one for years, but once I got this bike, I don't even care anymore.
My wonderful Aunt Gerry knew of my passion for cycling and when she passed on she left me some money with specific instructions to buy the best bike the shop had, so there was just no choice. I ordered a Serotta legend TI. It takes about six weeks to get it because they custom build it to fit your body. A Serotta is about the very finest bike you can get.
IMHO, of course.
My neighbor from two doors down had a horrible motocross accident that left him with nerve damage and some partial paralysis. Leonard is a tough cookie, so he fought his way through the recovery process and is now leading a pretty normal life except he deals with alot of pain all the time. He is so good natured that you can't tell though.
I encouraged him to try cycling as soon as he was able to re-establish a normal walk. He still has a little limp, but all things considered, he gets around really well and is independant as could be.
Leonard sometimes says he hates being a "cripple," but I tell him he is just slow and clumsy. He always gets a giggle out of that because he is a good sport. Everyone who knows Leonard is extremely proud of him because he was told he would never walk again at all. But any weekend you can see Leonard pulling the transmittion out of a friend's car or doing a valve job. He never stops moving.
Eventually, I got him riding. He had a tough time at first, but dealing with tough problems is routine for Leonard. Considering he really only has one good leg, he rides really well, and loves it. There are times I have to push hard to keep up with him.
Leonard's bike was junk though. He didn't want to spend alot of money until he was sure he could ride, but he was going great and deserved something really fast. Eventually we found him a nice used one and he reconditioned it to where it works really well. Leonard likes projects, so a new one would have been too easy for him.
And here is where everyone picks up the story and tries to make it their own. Once again, never believe anyone who tells you this story. This happened to me.
We were in a bike shop during the manufacture's "Super Sale" when all the manufacturers blow out all the end of year and overstock stuff. The shop was absolutely packed and one of the guys who worked at the shop (who sold me my bikes) was having to work Leonard and another guy at the same time.
And this other guy was an obnoxious blowhard.
He went on and on and on about how his Brand X was the greatest thing like it was the Taj Mahal or something. And his Brand X was this and his Brand X was that and the other. I don't know why he was shopping for a bike if the Brand X was that wonderful, but there he was, and making a pain out of himself.
Unlike my internet personna, I am a jovial, gentle and joyful man, so I just nodded and agreed that Brand X are indeed very nice, because they are. But to get real, there is nothing like a Serotta, at least not in my book. I don't think a Brand X is even close. It's like comparing a Ferrari to a Yugo. IMHO, of course.
He finally asks me what I ride and I really didn't want to say anything. I'm sort of cornered, really. He kept on until I just couldn't get out of answering the question. I tried to say it as contritely as possible because I don't like to burst people's bubble, but I was trapped. "'Right now I have a Serotta CSI."
And leonard adds "Yeah, until your Legend TI comes in."
The guy looked like someone had kicked him in the nads. He took a couple of deep, deep breaths, turned red and sneers at me saying "Yeah, sure you do."
Leonard just looked at me and erupted in hysterical laughter. He had to sit down on the floor right where he was standing. The salesman literally had tears streaming down his face and finally excused himself, went to the repair department and told the story. We could hear them all the way across the building and they were howling. All of this with about fifty oblivious people standing around and wondering why everyone else was acting so insane.
The blowhard had made his own bed, so all that was left for him to do was slink out. I heard the guy eventually came back and actually bought a Serotta. I imagine he is in some bike shop now saying "My Serotta......."
Now I can't go into the bike shop and make a statement of any kind without someone saying to me "Yeah, sure you do."
Anyway, the story is legendary and has worked it's way around all the bike shops down here. Pinarella owners tell the story like it happened to them and so do LeMond owners. Almost every shop that has high end bicycles has a rider telling this story like it happened to him. I'm sure it will work it's way up to where you are soon.