Top 11 reasons Dubya fell from his bicycle... again.

[oracle]

Top 11 reasons Dubya fell from his bicycle... again.

11. Departing Clinton staffers tampered with it.

10. Wanted to test the new helmet and mouth guard provided by the Secret Service after he fell during his last vacation, in May.

9. When you're a dry-drunk, every day is earth day.

8. Still trying to make people forget about how he was thrown by a Segway Scooter.

7. Training wheels removed for photo-op.

6. Needed pretext to declare "War on Gravity!"

5. Lost in Lance Armstrong fantasy (Condoleezza Rice as Sheryl Crow).

4. Derailleur = French treachery!

3. (D)ick Cheney keeps telling him to live on the edge.

2. The Texas Air National Guard spent a million dollars to train him as a fighter pilot, not to ride a bicycle.

1. He's still too afraid of horses to ride one.

courtesy of:www.toostupidtobepresident.com

[kenyee]

sounds like it's written by someone who's never tried MTB'ing...rocks & branches = falling :-)

[Climb01742]

could he have been trying to ride and chew gum at the same time?

[oracle]

maybe he was reminiscing about his multiple drunk driving convictions that were wiped off of his record, or thinking about his days of coke and bawdy women.....

[shinomaster]

I bet he was trying to remember where he left his last War.?

[shinomaster]

because he was trying to remember the alphabet? Or how to count to 10?

Oh wait that was Dan Quail....Oh wait, Potatoe was his achilles heel, not Arabic numbers.

so sorry to confuse W, with Quail...

both were, are-- men of sound failings.

[zap]

Kerry keeps falling on his road bike!

Thats right, he can't make up his mind.

[Climb01742]

maybe george fell because **** cheney wasn't there telling him what to do?

[Kevin]

Maybe George fell because while riding on his own ranch he lost his balance when he ran over the weapons of mass destruction that he has been searching for in Iraq.

Kevin

[slowgoing]

Because George Sr. almost fell but didn't finish the job.

[shinomaster]

Kerry fell because he slipped on some wet $100 bills in his drive way.

[oracle]

a glimpse into dubya's addled mind as he negotiated the trail:

syria or i-ran, which one next? ha! bomb i-ran! nucular....nucleear? damn! oops, sorry lord....must pedal harder! whoa- a rock! ha ha !! i-raq! #$%*@&%rocks! #$%*@&%*@&% i-raqis! that'll teach them towel-heads! whoa! i'm losing control..... how come i kin control the whole world but not this god damned $%@#*&^ bike? oops.....sorry again lord....can you really hear me swear? why won't you answer me, damn it!? oops, sorry again....you won't let that a-hole john kerry win will ya lord?? just give me a sign....any sign.... oh no...oh *****.........(*CRASH*) god damn it!! lord, do you mind if i have just one drink?? to ease the pain??

[shinomaster]

I always wondered what went through his mind. :crap:

[flydhest]

OK, all in good fun. However--and I am somewhat shocked to think that I'm in any way coming to the defense of the current President--I know I for one would have much, much more contempt for him if he went mountain biking fairly frequently and DIDN'T fall. While mountain biking, if you don't fall, you're not riding hard enough.

In any event, I know it's all in good fun, but let's never lose sight of the fact that there are many, many newspaper articles now about the two presidential candidates riding bikes. That gives me a modicum of hope for the future.

[bags27]

When Kerry was told about the first time Bush fell, he remarked that maybe someone had removed the training wheels.

[Bill Bove]

When Kerry was told about the first time Bush fell, he remarked that maybe someone had removed the training wheels.

Well, Kerry really shouldn't be dissen W for biffen, his jersey seems to have asphalt seeking technology too.

Oracle, I like you man! You may be the only one other than Climb who is as "unpleased" with BushCo as me.

[oracle]

that's why i love racing on the track, bill.

[Dekonick]

Cmon guys... we dont want to lose the forum again.

:mad:

[Climb01742]

look at my second post, where i mentioned the vice president. i wrote the nickname for "richard" as his first name. there must be software on the phorum that searches for "forbidden" words and does the **** thing. how odd. i guess context isn't considered. ok...kids, let's try to find words containing "forbidden" words and see if the software catches them... how about "assignation"? "buttress"? "dictation" almost works...but let's keep it clean. :banana:

[OnceFast]

Check out the Kerry/Bush bike pics in today's NYTimes(Sec. 4) and tell me which one of these guys Osama would want coming after him. Ben, please send Kerry a Serotta jersey and tell him to ditch the baggy Tshirts.

[oracle]

"Cmon guys... we dont want to lose the forum again. "

huh? what are you talking about, si vous plait? a) this is most assuredly bike related and b) good clean fun.

i wasn't aware that the thought police were monitoring the forum.

[Dekonick]

:)

I dont mind, but I would hate to lose the forum. :bike:

[oracle]

why would that happen, deke? is there a rule about political discourse or banter about which i am not aware?

[Ozz]

why would that happen, deke? is there a rule about political discourse or banter about which i am not aware?

From the Forum User Agreement:

This Forum is:

For viewing and browsing or for posting civil discussions by Serotta owners and non-owners alike.

To discuss Serotta products and anything relating to Serotta products, history, lore, events, etc.

A place for potential Serotta owners to pose questions relating to Serotta products and to gain information from current Serotta owners about their Serotta(s).

For discussion of cycling-related topics

For discussion of bicycle fit-related topics

A marketplace for the sale of cycling products by forum members (not by retailers and manufacturers)

For fun!

Keep it civil and I think we're O.K.

:banana:

[oracle]

hooray!

thanks ozz

[shinomaster]

But Kerry has a Serotta, and W doesn't, so clearly this is a relevant discussion, as Kerry is the more bright person?

[Dekonick]

:)

Anyone who has a Serotta is ok in my book!

I wasnt trying to make waves...and besides, I dont like Mr Bush's politics. Nader gets my vote!

Dont worry bout me - I am not bothered at all. I just thought that politics were kinda - frowned upon - by the staff.

:fight:

[shinomaster]

Sadly, a vote For Bush.

[Dekonick]

Not true! Nader, while extreme, holds many of the same values I have. I am a tree hugger... and my vote goes where I believe it should. Nader gets my vote.

Now if he only rode a Serotta... :p

[oracle]

that's why all of the bush-o-holics are running around the nation trying to ensure that nader will be on the ballot in as many states as possible, even helping poor ralph collect signatures... you could share values with mickey mouse, jim morrison, or vanna white and voting for them will yield similar results to voting for nader. right now it is a two-party system, like it or not, love it or leave it. a vote outside of that system is effectively a protest vote, no mater how sincere or well intended it may be. it is ironic that nader's campaign last year did more to polarize the two party system and decrease the legitimacy and viabiliy of third party candidates in the near future. a real tripartite system would be great- then we wouldn't have to hear nader say 'duopoloy' every time he went before a television camera.

[zap]

Realllllyyyy don't want to get into it, but hey, they both ride bikes :)

Now what would be really nice is if they (Bush, Kerry-whoever wins) could tie federal transport money to some bike friendly laws. For example, somehow force states to inact laws that motorists are automaticaly at fault with real penalties for not avoiding pedestrians and cyclists who obey traffic laws. Something along the line of whats done in Germany. Wishfull thinking maybe but hey, its gotta start somewhere.

Now Oracle-From what I understand, aren't dems trying to prevent Nader from getting on said ballots. Unless there are real laws to prevent Nader from running, why shouldn't he. It's a free country. In some countries, granted with different politico systems, 3rd parties started from nothing to becoming strong enough to get some laws pushed through. Greens for example.

But, IMO, this time around, many of those that voted for Nader in '00 probably won't do so again for the reason you have given. The republicans that are helping Nader might be wasting valuable time supporting Naders ballot drive. While it might be hard to do some times, give voters more credit.

But anyhow, how about some bike friendly laws for a change :banana: :banana:

[flydhest]

Realllllyyyy don't want to get into it, but hey, they both ride bikes :)

Three cheers for zap . . . he hit it on the head!

Now what would be really nice is if they (Bush, Kerry-whoever wins) could tie federal transport money to some bike friendly laws. For example, somehow force states to inact laws that motorists are automaticaly at fault with real penalties for not avoiding pedestrians and cyclists who obey traffic laws. Something along the line of whats done in Germany. Wishfull thinking maybe but hey, its gotta start somewhere.

. . . but that might encourage people to bike more, which would reduce pollution and dependency on foreign oil. Can't have that, can we??? :no:

Now Oracle-From what I understand, aren't dems trying to prevent Nader from getting on said ballots. Unless there are real laws to prevent Nader from running, why shouldn't he. It's a free country. In some countries, granted with different politico systems, 3rd parties started from nothing to becoming strong enough to get some laws pushed through. Greens for example.
actually, the US has examples of 3rd parties becoming dominant party. Notice how the Whig party can't seem to field a candidate this year? In all honesty, in response to Oracle's point, I'm somewhat sympathetic to some (but not all--he's clearly disengenuous at times) of Nader's arguments, but looking back at 2000, I think Ralphie boy is right to point out that there are many other "but for" cases, and the Dems all but rolled up and died. The analogy that works for me is in sports when in the last 30 seconds someone scores and the assertion is they lost in the last seconds. Well, you had the whole freakin' rest of the game to outscore your opponent as well. The loss in Florida set aside, there were other states and electoral votes that Gore lost that had nothing to do with chads, ralphs, or state troopers.

But, IMO, this time around, many of those that voted for Nader in '00 probably won't do so again for the reason you have given. The republicans that are helping Nader might be wasting valuable time supporting Naders ballot drive. While it might be hard to do some times, give voters more credit.

But anyhow, how about some bike friendly laws for a change :banana: :banana:
again, three cheers for zap. If the right-wing nut and the liberal kook both ride bikes, things could be a lot worse.

[oracle]

Unless there are real laws to prevent Nader from running, why shouldn't he. It's a free country

i agree completely. i would never discourage anyone from running for president, i just discourage people from voting for them. i have a great deal of respect for nader and his views; however, i feel that there is only a modicum of truth in the old maxim that there is no such thing as a wasted vote.

[Ozz]

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/5591533/

"Two party system marches towards oblivion"

The author was part of Dean's campaign, but he raises some interesting points about third party candidates.

I do not know if he rides a bike.

[SBash]

Sorry, i couldn't help myself!

[Dekonick]

It may be a two party system, but it will NOT change unless we are willing to vote for a third party. It has to start somewhere.

Nader gets my vote, and it wont matter anyway as Maryland is clearly going to go Kerry.

I just wish more people would vote - and vote informed!

Often its not the big ticket candidate who makes the biggest changes... its the little guy. How many of you voted for your school board? or county council? or DA? etc...

Its improtant to vote for the Gov, Mayor, congressman, senator, prez... but the little guys make the local policy! Especially policy that impacts cyclists. I never heard of a president passing anything to do with rails to trails... etc...

I gotta ask - why did Kerry paint that Ottrott??? I like the natural look with tints...

Hey you Marylanders - anyone ride weekdays??? Looking to ride more from 9am-noon and want company!

Go Terps!!! :D

[jerk]

the jerk is writing in King George the Third. American independence was a complete and utter failure. If King George were alive and a bicycle rider he would ride a C50 and never crash. The jerk doesn't know why he knows this to be true but it probably is.

[flydhest]

http://www.theonion.com/infograph/index.php?issue=4031

[Dekonick]

ROFLMAO - hehe.

[oracle]

wouldn't king george ride a terry dolan?

[oracle]

attention hippies (http://www.heavy.com/bush/)

[pbbob]

wouldn't king george ride a terry dolan?
a raleigh with a b-17 brooks

[PanTerra]

the jerk is writing in King George the Third. American independence was a complete and utter failure. If King George were alive and a bicycle rider he would ride a C50 and never crash. The jerk doesn't know why he knows this to be true but it probably is.

How's that funny tobacco?

[oracle]

cycling video game (http://www.thespeciousreport.com/2004/04040529bushbikeride.html)

[Kevin]

Oracle,

Very nice link.

Kevin