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onekgguy
09-11-2007, 08:38 PM
...I occasionally watch Dr. Phil...but it's usually only while I'm getting my water bottles filled and getting suited up to go on a ride.

Yesterday's show was disturbing. They were talking about people driving and texting with their cellphones. It's not news to me that this goes on...I was nearly taken out earlier in the year by a young woman who drifted onto the shoulder nearly hitting me while she appeared to be texting with her cellphone extended in her right hand.

Anyway, the woman on the show yesterday was a 17 year old HS student. She didn't see anything wrong with texting even as she admitted to having had several incidents...a combination of hitting things and getting a speeding ticket...80 in a 55 zone in the four months since she got her license. All this because she was distracted due to her need to read and answer text messages.

The show also had a 19 year old guy who had killed a bicyclist with his car because he had his head down not paying attention while texting. He was devastated by what he'd done and came on the show to try and encourage other people to not text and drive.

After listening to him tell his sobering experience of killing another person for something so stupid, Dr Phil asked the young woman if listening the man's story would cause her to rethink her behavior. "Maybe a little" she said. Yeah right. You could tell it wasn't going to have any effect on her whatsoever. The mother appeared reluctant to take the cellphone away from her although when pressed she said that she would.

The mother was concerned that her daughter have the cellphone for safety reasons in case she urgently needed help. I don't think there's anything 'safe' about having a cellphone in the hands of most drivers much less a newly licensed driver.

What's disturbing is that I don't think there is any getting through to most of those texting while driving. Unfortunately it's likely going to take an accident before some of them stop.

Our daughter will be getting her license in the next year and she is addicted to texting as are her friends. We've talked about it and she promises she won't use her cellphone while driving but I'm not convinced.

I'd be interested in hearing how others of you in my situation handled this or any thoughts people have related to this. She a good kid and I want to trust her but I don't want to see her get in over her head. My wife thought it would be great if there was some sort of jamming device which would disable the cellphone while the engine of the car was turned on. It sounds like a great invention in need of inventing.

Kevin g

Peter P.
09-11-2007, 08:47 PM
You can't police your daughter's every move. However, if she gets a ticket or arrested because of something that occurs while she's driving and using a cellphone, the best thing you can do is not pay her ticket or bail her out of jail.

csm
09-11-2007, 08:50 PM
How about you tell her not to do use her cellphone while driving? seems simple but....

BumbleBeeDave
09-11-2007, 09:12 PM
. . . as motorists harassing or hitting cyclists in general. Until there are enough people killed because of it to create enough general outrage--like with DUI because of MADD some years ago--the laws will not be toughened up and the authorities will not enforce them.

Looking at cases reported in our paper, even now with tougher DUI laws on the books, the enforcement by the courts--following through with really tough sentences to establish a true deterrent--is still lagging. As another example--we have a law here in NY state outlawing using a cell phone while driving unless you have a headset or other hand-free aid. But everyone ignores it and the police don't enforce it.

Drivers are going to keep right on texting away until enough of them hit and kill enough relatives of senators and congressmen to get something changed.

BBD

imp25rs
09-11-2007, 09:43 PM
As another example--we have a law here in NY state outlawing using a cell phone while driving unless you have a headset or other hand-free aid. But everyone ignores it and the police don't enforce it.

BBD

They are talking about passing a similiar law in Washington State but I am not convinced it will help. The way I see it, it isn't that there hand is tied up by holding the phone, it is that they are concentrating on the phone call more than they are concentrating on the road. That doesn't change with a handsfree device. People just need to PUT THE CELL PHONES DOWN while driving.

Bud_E
09-11-2007, 10:51 PM
Personally I'd rather eat glass than listen to Dr. Phil and I definitely wouldn't admit watching him ( even if I did :rolleyes: ). I've witnessed my 18 year old daughter texting at least 10 of her friends simultaneously on our home computer so I was as concerned as you are about the prospect of her behind the wheel. She just got her driver's license at the beginning of summer.

I think the key is to appeal to her intelligence in a non-condescending way. I talked to my daughter and tried to get her to come to the conclusion: 1) If she even has a drop of alcohol, absolutely no getting behind the wheel. 2) Driving is serious business -- no texting or talking on the phone noway nohow while driving. I want her to realize that the consequences of getting pulled over in that situation ( much less having an accident ) would make her life so miserable, it's not worth the risk.

At some point you just have to accept the fact that she'll be out of your direct control -- there's always the possibility she'll screw up. But I think the key is to discuss it with her as if she's an adult. She'll be more apt to treat driving as a serious endeavor.

Ray
09-11-2007, 10:58 PM
They are talking about passing a similiar law in Washington State but I am not convinced it will help. The way I see it, it isn't that there hand is tied up by holding the phone, it is that they are concentrating on the phone call more than they are concentrating on the road. That doesn't change with a handsfree device. People just need to PUT THE CELL PHONES DOWN while driving.Is talking on a cell phone hands free really that different than talking to someone else IN the car? I'm not saying it isn't, but I'm not convinced it is either. This came up in another recent thread - there are all sorts of distractions to drivers, some of which we find perfectly acceptable. What about listening to a CD? Or talk radio? People have been listening to the radio in the car forever. Is that less distracting? What about books on tape? Those can take you mentally to a whole 'nother place.

I think texting is an extreme example and should DEFINITELY be outlawed, given that it would be tough to enforce. But I'm not sure about cell-phones at all, and even less so when they're hands free. I very rarely talk on the phone while driving, but I've done it and haven't noticed any real distraction from it except while dialing. Which is no worse than looking down to get a new CD or search for a new radio station.

Just my impressions,

-Ray

tiger
09-12-2007, 06:10 AM
...
Our daughter will be getting her license in the next year and she is addicted to texting as are her friends. We've talked about it and she promises she won't use her cellphone while driving but I'm not convinced.
Kevin g

My 16 year old daughter has a cell phone and has her learner's permit and is ready for her road test. We got her a cellphone last Christmas, but made the decision to disable text messaging (Verizon has this option). We didn't think of the driving issue then, we just object to the addiction to text messaging that we see in kids. This summer 5 teenage girls were killed less than ten miles from my house in an accident that was associated with text messaging while driving.

It will be hard to "take away" something your daughter now sees as a birthright. I know my daughter was disappointed that we disabled text messaging. But I also know that after that horrific accident this summer she understood and appreciated that her parents cared enough about her to do what they thought was right even if it disappointed her at the time.

Your idea of a cell phone blocking signal within cars is perfect.

Too Tall
09-12-2007, 06:22 AM
OneKGuy - I am heartened by your approach and concern for your daughter. G-d forbid anything should happen as result from her inattention. What would happen if you took her on a tour of the ER on saturday night? A bit of "this is this and that is that" can have a sobering effect. To know that kids her age are involved in risky behaviour and consequences which are real and devastating. She can't ignore the looks on families faces sitting in the waiting room. Just a thought. You are right, she needs to make decisions. Give her something to work with.

stevep
09-12-2007, 06:27 AM
cel phone ...a curse and a blessing..like so much stuff.
funniest picture i wish i had a camera...4 teenagers together walking down the street...all 4 talking to someone else on a cel phone.
hey, maybe they awere talking to each other... who knows.

Ray
09-12-2007, 06:54 AM
cel phone ...a curse and a blessing..like so much stuff.
funniest picture i wish i had a camera...4 teenagers together walking down the street...all 4 talking to someone else on a cel phone.
hey, maybe they awere talking to each other... who knows.
Yeah, they were probably all talking together on a conference call - almost as much fun as hanging out!

-Ray

onekgguy
09-12-2007, 07:47 AM
I think the idea of showing her the results of inattentiveness as TT suggested is a good one...the scared straight approach. I'm trying at the same time to get her to take to heart my/our concerns and not take a defensive posture and stop listening to us. I suppose that's the fine line we parents walk every day as we try and prod our kids in the right direction.

She's never in the past given us a reason not to trust her but it goes without saying that her cellphone will be taken away if we come to find out that she's using it while driving. This is too important an issue to 'hope' she gets it right but in the end that's really where we're at.

I suppose a lot of this is me remember the stuff I did at her age. yikes.

Kevin g

Tom
09-12-2007, 08:04 AM
Is talking on a cell phone hands free really that different than talking to someone else IN the car?
-Ray

Unless the other person is blind, yes it is.

Realize that we can get ourselves all bunched up about cars splattering bicyclists like overripe melons but absolutely nothing is going to happen until we start pointing out that cars run into other cars because of it. Then you'll see action, especially when you can get the Daddys and Mommys of the Commuter's Paradise worked up over it because their shiny happy little children might get bruised somehow.

For example locally: some lady drove past her husband's place of work. He called her cell phone to tease her about not waving and as the local paper's headline read: "A ring, and then silence." She crossed the yellow line, head on, two dead. And the paper reported that it was a mystery why she would cross over into oncoming traffic.

Um.... I think I might know. And I'm not even a trained law enforcement professional or an inquisitive journalist accustomed to connecting the dots.

Birddog
09-12-2007, 08:16 AM
When my daughter was first driving, I told her NO CELL PHONE, if she was seen driving while on phone NO CAR.

I agree that at least on the surface of it, talking on the phone while driving is no different than having a conversation with someone in the car. I know that from my own experience, I will suspend any conversation if the driving requires it.
The problem lies in "dialing" up someone while driving, that requires attention on many phones and is not as simple as punching a new radio station. When people drive and hold a phone to their ear, they usually neglect to use turn indicators and this is a major piss off to me.

Not too long ago, I approached one of the hundreds of 4 way STOPs that are used in my area. There was a car at every STOP each with a driver holding a cell phone to the ear, and each trying to negotiate a left turn, and each wondering whose turn it was to go. Only one of the cars signaled their intent to turn. I was on a bicycle going straight. I just shook my head as I cleared that intersection.

It is my opinion, that cell phone use definitely impairs driving. It's not so much the talking, it's holding the phone, "dialing", texting, fumbling for it, etc that cause the bulk of the problems. I think "hands free" is a huge step in the right direction, and NOBODY should be texting while driving, that's right up their with DUI IMO.

Birddog

Kirk007
09-12-2007, 10:05 AM
Soon to be facing the same situation. We disabled text capability on my son's phone from the get-go. He's never complained - at least not to me!

In Eugene, being a small town, there are a lot of eyes, so depending on your community another option would be a no cell phone while the car is moving rule and police it through reports from friends etc. It works well with wearing a bicycle helmet - our son is good about wearing his helmet; his friends are not and we get regular reports regarding this from the bike shops, other riders, neighbors etc.

One issue is do you talk on the cell phone while driving? Hard to enforce a policy that you violate. I may have to curb my own bad habit once Ian gets his permit and then license.

Another option might be a good drivers class - something well beyond the typical drivers ed. I know I'll be investigating these soon.

And finally, even scarier to me - how do you keep them out of friends cars when the friend is texting/chatting away behind the wheel?

Greg

davids
09-12-2007, 10:08 AM
[old fart mode]

I don't get text messaging. WHY DON'T THEY JUST TALK TO EACH OTHER???

[/old fart mode]

...I know, I know. There are some times (sitting in the back of a classroom or meeting) that you just can't talk out loud. It still kills me.

MilanoTom
09-12-2007, 10:52 AM
I heard a news story on the radio that because of an increase in fatal accidents, the Massachusetts legislature is considering a bill to require that bicyclists and motorcyclists wear helmets. It's sort of like addressing the problem of armed criminals by requiring that everybody wear body armor.

At least most bills (most likely including this one) don't make it out of committee.

Regards.
Tom

djcrimmins
09-12-2007, 11:11 AM
It sure does seem like there have been more fatal car-bicycle accidents lately. Here's one today where a young woman was killed by a garbage truck while she was riding and talking on her cell phone.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chi-070912cyclist-killed,0,7887468.story

It seems like there's a new tragedy every day. Be careful out there.

--Dan.

Kevan
09-12-2007, 12:01 PM
we disabled our kid's phones. When they protested, I told them they could continue to type away as much as they liked; I wasn't going to stop them from doing that.