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weaponsgrade
08-24-2007, 02:56 PM
any speech writers here? what do I say? Groom is my brother. He's a cycling nut, likes the outdoors. Bride isn't much of an outdoor person, but she's got an open mind and good attitude. I haven't known her very long - a group dinner here and there. My brother convinced her to go on a 16 mi hike in the Sierras with us once - it happened to rain that day, it was cold and windy, she slipped and feel on her ***, but she kept a smile - even though she later revealed to my brother that she wanted to cry. So I'm thinking I should say something about that (not the crying since I'm not supposed to know).

DRZRM
08-24-2007, 03:11 PM
Not for nuthin', I've had to do a few of these, and I've seen a bunch. Everyone notices when you go out of your way to address the positive attributes of the bride, too many best men go on about their relationship with the groom (your brother) and barely mention the bride. Just by what you have written it's obvious you won't fall into that camp, and it sounds like you already have a great anecdote about her positive attitude in the face of a rough dose of mother nature already.

The only other thing I think is important is to remember to remind everyone is how good it was for him to have met her. I think every best man's toast should end with the fact that the groom is a better person for/since being with his bride, in your eyes the thing she's done that is most praiseworthy is making your brother the happiest he's ever been.

Shouldn't be a dry eye in the house. Even better if it's true.

PS This does not mean you should skip over the touching anecdote about you and your brother, just be sure to add to it.

svoop
08-24-2007, 03:16 PM
short and sweet

smile

say nice things about the couple

say thankyou to everyone for coming

the story about the rainy hike could be nice if you are tactful...or she might cry

wedding speeches should be about them, not you. don't try to impress people with what a great comedian you are. i've seen too many f***ed up speeches that were obviously auditions for something.

BumbleBeeDave
08-24-2007, 03:21 PM
. . . just don't get no respect! :rolleyes:

http://www.rodney.com/rodney/home/home.asp

BBD

fierte_poser
08-24-2007, 03:23 PM
don't say anything bad/demeaning about her. imo, the story about her falling is a no go.

you are allowed to say something slightly embarrasing about the groom, but it should not involve: alcohol, women, etc.

describe the situation whereby you realized that this was the perfect woman for your brother. tell him in front of everyone how lucky he is to have her for his bride.

toast to their future together.

<3 minutes.

BumbleBeeDave
08-24-2007, 03:27 PM
don't say anything bad/demeaning about her. imo, the story about her falling is a no go.

you are allowed to say something slightly embarrasing about the groom, but it should not involve: alcohol, women, etc.

describe the situation whereby you realized that this was the perfect woman for your brother. tell him in front of everyone how lucky he is to have her for his bride.

toast to their future together.

<3 minutes.

+1

swoop
08-24-2007, 03:31 PM
um...
yeah .. don't be a comedy writer.. just be genuine and keep it thoughtful, and warm.

do a little google search on wedding speeches....

...

Svoop? wow... well done.

TimD
08-24-2007, 03:38 PM
Speak from the heart, welcome her to the family, and put any petty differences aside

Consider mention of the courage and enthusiasm they are bringing to the union, which they'll need in the inevitable tough times ahead (plenty of public examples right here on this board, unfortunately :( ) You could digress here to make mention of the hiking story.

If you think they want kids make some mention of family and the future.

If it is all about your bro bc. you don't know her well then consider making a statement that you are looking forward to getting to know your new sister...

Or you could just quote from Springsteen's Tunnel of Love:

Then the lights go out and its just the three of us
You me and all that stuff were so scared of
Gotta ride down baby into this tunnel of love

Theres a crazy mirror showing us both in 5-d
I'm laughing at you you're laughing at me
There's a room of shadows that gets so dark brother
It's easy for two people to lose each other in this tunnel of love

It ought to be easy ought to be simple enough
Man meets woman and they fall in love
But the house is haunted and the ride gets rough
And youve got to learn to live with what you cant rise above if you want to ride on down in through this tunnel of love

Have fun! :beer:

gt6267a
08-24-2007, 03:50 PM
A litmus test, in the church / synagogue / a silent corn field Ö wherever this is happening. You fart loudly. What happens? 1) Outright laughter. 2) People giggle to themselves. 3) Everyone acts like it didnít happen. 4) People talk bad about you under their breath. 4) People talk about your lack of couth loud enough for you to hear.

I say think about and know your audience. If the answer is 1-3 you are good to go with the hiking story and other comments. Speak from the heart Ö if you feel so inclined say something about your brotherís childhood and him growing up into a man marrying a wonderful woman, may he one day prove himself worthy Ö if the answer is 4-5, skip the stories. Say a nice sentence or two and sit down rapidly.

edited to add, i agree with the < 3min. time yourself.

bozman
08-24-2007, 03:55 PM
don't say anything bad/demeaning about her. imo, the story about her falling is a no go.

you are allowed to say something slightly embarrasing about the groom, but it should not involve: alcohol, women, etc.

describe the situation whereby you realized that this was the perfect woman for your brother. tell him in front of everyone how lucky he is to have her for his bride.

toast to their future together.

<3 minutes.

+ 2
I was Crossjunkee's best man last year. Short and sweet. Thank the guests for coming, praise the bride, get one good laugh at the groom's expense :rolleyes:

weaponsgrade
08-24-2007, 04:17 PM
Good thanks. I got a better direction on where to go. Yes, I definitely don't want this to end up being a tribute to my brother kind of speech. I was at a wedding once where the best man did a 10 min. speech about what a great fella the groom was and didn't mention the bride once.

Speech will be at some banquet place (not church - they're not religious), friends (my brother's) though well-educated are pretty laid back and enjoy scatological humor. Not too sure about the bride's.

loewer
08-24-2007, 05:18 PM
Maybe you don't want to be funny, but...

a friend had given every woman at the reception a key, and at the beginning of the speech, said he had to collect all of the outstanding keys that the groom had given to girlfriends over the years. Every woman, young and old, proceeded to stand up, go forward, and hand in a key.

Funny?

rwsaunders
08-24-2007, 05:44 PM
Try this...."In days of old, when knights were bold, and ladies weren't particular.....". Wait, that's from my book of dirty Irish Limericks. Try this site instead.

www.weddingtoasts.com

jimcav
08-24-2007, 05:59 PM
Maybe you don't want to be funny, but...

a friend had given every woman at the reception a key, and at the beginning of the speech, said he had to collect all of the outstanding keys that the groom had given to girlfriends over the years. Every woman, young and old, proceeded to stand up, go forward, and hand in a key.

Funny?
i was best man where that was forced on me by the father of the groom--who thought it a hoot. i made it a little less blatant by saying teh groom had been nice enough to let me stay with him when i'd been on hard times over the years, but i wanted the bride to know i'd not be crashing there again so here is my key. then the planted girls in the audience stood up one by one and said--well, i have a key to return too, etc.
the bride had a great sense of humor by the way--i know her well still, and i know by her expression she did not find it funny, but she was a good sport about it.

weddings for most women i know are a huge thing--for some the thing. funny in a really sweet way is good, being vulgar, sophmoric, crass, etc is not what i think most want for that day.
I agree that something that emphasises what all hope--that the whole is better than the parts, that the love is inspiring, etc

andy mac
08-24-2007, 06:04 PM
short.

touching.

funny bits.

don't use any jokes or gags you have heard at other weddings.

make the bride feel a bazillion dollars.

rehearse, rehease, rehease. rewrite. rehearse. rewrite. rehearse.

even the most seemingly off-the-cuff comedy routines have been tweaked extensively. delivery, pauses, facial expresions all help sell it.

if you've never seem the documentary on seinfeld called 'comedian' it's a great look at the anguish and hard work that goes into coming up with good original material.

jack + coke seems to help too.

:beer:

Len J
08-24-2007, 07:18 PM
1.) Swoop is right....remember it is not about you.....it's about them.

2.) Remember, Truth Resonates. Sit back and think of the 10 attributes that you thinkof when you think of your Brother. Do the same thing for his bride. Pick the top 3 to 5 Positives for each of them. Describe them fom your heart. Truth Resonates.

3.) Why are you happy they are getting married? Truth resonates.

4.) Honor them.

Short...sweet and honest.

Len

Fixed
08-24-2007, 07:31 PM
bro is the bike going on the honeymoon ? mine did
cheers
just have a few drinks and have fun and talk about the kid you know and his new wife cos she's family now ..imho

swoop
08-24-2007, 07:54 PM
1.) Swoop is right....remember it is not about you.....it's about them.

2.) Remember, Truth Resonates. Sit back and think of the 10 attributes that you thinkof when you think of your Brother. Do the same thing for his bride. Pick the top 3 to 5 Positives for each of them. Describe them fom your heart. Truth Resonates.

3.) Why are you happy they are getting married? Truth resonates.

4.) Honor them.

Short...sweet and honest.

Len

that was Svoop that was right. I'm Swoop... someone is having fun with names. which is admittedly pretty funny.

norman neville
08-24-2007, 08:16 PM
the drunker, the better. make sure you are the most hammered living being in the county. use anatomical descriptions and slang that would nauseate a pirate or pervert tv minister. remember past slights and insults, and not just from your brother. and punch anyone who tries to stop you before you are good and done.

Len J
08-24-2007, 08:21 PM
that was Svoop that was right. I'm Swoop... someone is having fun with names. which is admittedly pretty funny.

Damn.....that was clever.

It sounded like you too...........pretty good.

Len

DarrenCT
08-24-2007, 08:45 PM
good ideas. espicially the jack + coke part...

if everyone is hammered, they'll all forget.

time for a beer...
-d

short.

touching.

funny bits.

don't use any jokes or gags you have heard at other weddings.

make the bride feel a bazillion dollars.

rehearse, rehease, rehease. rewrite. rehearse. rewrite. rehearse.

even the most seemingly off-the-cuff comedy routines have been tweaked extensively. delivery, pauses, facial expresions all help sell it.

if you've never seem the documentary on seinfeld called 'comedian' it's a great look at the anguish and hard work that goes into coming up with good original material.

jack + coke seems to help too.

:beer:

svoop
08-24-2007, 09:01 PM
Damn.....that was clever.

It sounded like you too...........pretty good.

Len

which was all that i needed to hear, thanks.

svoop is done now.

swoop
08-24-2007, 09:09 PM
i don't mind you taking the plss outta me. its funny. but yeah.. it has gotten confusing.

Noonan
08-24-2007, 09:26 PM
Above all, make sure to have eye contact with the bride and groom, and as you complete the toast, be looking at the groom. That small touch makes for a classy toast...