I had a "Star Wars" moment...

[Kevan]

So this morning's ride to work, I swallowed a bug. Damn thing made me cough in reflex it was so…so…buggy. So annoying it is, washing it down with a chug of energy drink. My mind immediately went a stray, thinking about the many bugs I had been swallowing this summer, paying not a whole lot of attention to my safe-being on the narrow-shouldered roadway or progress in route, but consumed by potentiality that I just might be under attack! My mind having little else to do while I was getting myself through my commute continued. What if that bug wasn't a bug at all, but some sort of micro rebel fighter, purposely flying down my hatch intent on destroying a member of the evil empire? Us! From within?

Was it laying my inners to waste as I cranked? Or am I to be obliterated at any moment by a subatomic explosion like the alien mother ship from the film "Independence Day"?

Honestly guys, when I belched in contentment, my sudden breakfast, I could’a sworn I heard the Jolly Rodger cackle from within.

So what do you think about on your bike rides?

[Bob Ross]

So what do you think about on your bike rides?

It's not so much a question of *what* I think about, but I've noticed that if I think about ANYTHING, anything at all, I immediately slow down.

The moment my mind wanders to anything other than cycling-related activities -- maintaining my cadence, watching out for hazards, hanging on to someone's wheel, consulting a cue sheet, whatever -- I fall of the established pace. Boom, instantly. It's the weirdest thing.

When I'm riding alone and not so concerned with maintaining a paceline, then I'll let my mind wander

...and then I'll usually wind up thinking about sex.

[itsflantastic]

So what do you think about on your bike rides?



"Get Out of My way Cab!"

"Use your Signal Mother *******!!"

"Look at that A*** parked in the Bike Lane!!!"

"Should I take the Brooklyn or Manhattan bridge. . . hmm, the cute girl on the bike went that way. . . ." (time elapses) "Hi, I'm Dan"

:beer:

On long road rides, I think about life, nature, all those peaceful things. A time and a place for everything.

[Firenze]

Kevan, how do we know that is still you and not a body snatcher?
I think about what guys always think about when left to their own devices...upgrades to the bike. :)

[BumbleBeeDave]

Kevan replaced by the pod people? How exactly would we tell the difference? :rolleyes:

I remember reading somewhere that the average person swallows half a dozen spiders in their lifetime while they're asleep . . . :eek:

BBD

[David Kirk]

Pizza...........that's what I think about.

Dave

[itsflantastic]

I remember reading somewhere that the average person swallows half a dozen spiders in their lifetime while they're asleep . . .


I thought it was 3 per year. . .

But, I just looked into it. Apparently it's a myth! I'm actually a little disappointed. I guess it has something to do with where you sleep though eh? :banana:

[Ginger]

Then there's the old trick of putting a 1" piece of double sticky tape on the front edge of your helmet...check it after the ride. What's stuck is what you swallowed with or without noticing it...

I don't think it works if you're mountain biking though...I've only had one horsefly hit the back of my throat...and those suckers don't go down. The tape told another story...I think bugs dodge a little. But you'd think with all those eyes they'd be better at avoiding getting swallowed.




Kevan,
Everyone knows that hummingbirds are little aliens. Bugs not so much.

What do I think of when I inhale a bug??

COUGH HACK HACK ....I hope that one wasn't an egg layer... COUGH ...hmmm, guess my lungs needed cleaning out anyhow...HACK ...ick...I have a wing caught at the back of my throat...COUGH COUGH...

What do I think of when I ride? My pedal stroke.
Spinnnn spin spin spin spinnnn
mmmmmm ice cream
Spinnnn spin spin spin spinnnn
good doggie
spin spin spin
good driver Thank YOU!
spin spin spin
HEY NOW
spin spin spin
shift
spin spin spinnnn
nice bikey
spin spin
fenders?
spinn spin spin spin
and so it goes

[BBB]

So this morning's ride to work, I swallowed a bug. Damn thing made me cough in reflex it was so…so…buggy. So annoying it is, washing it down with a chug of energy drink. My mind immediately went a stray, thinking about the many bugs I had been swallowing this summer, paying not a whole lot of attention to my safe-being on the narrow-shouldered roadway or progress in route, but consumed by potentiality that I just might be under attack! My mind having little else to do while I was getting myself through my commute continued. What if that bug wasn't a bug at all, but some sort of micro rebel fighter, purposely flying down my hatch intent on destroying a member of the evil empire? Us! From within?

Was it laying my inners to waste as I cranked? Or am I to be obliterated at any moment by a subatomic explosion like the alien mother ship from the film "Independence Day"?

Honestly guys, when I belched in contentment, my sudden breakfast, I could’a sworn I heard the Jolly Rodger cackle from within.

So what do you think about on your bike rides?

So your ride was a bit like this:

EXTERIOR: DEATH STAR TRENCH.

Vader's wingman panics at the sight of the oncoming pirate
starship and veers radically to one side, colliding with
Vader's TIE fighter in the process. Vader's wingman crashes
into the side wall of the trench and explodes. Vader's damaged
ship spins out of the trench with a damaged wing.

EXTERIOR: SPACE AROUND THE DEATH STAR.

Vader's ship spins out of control with a bent solar fin,
heading for deep space.

INTERIOR: DARTH VADER'S COCKPIT.

Vader turns round and round in circles as his ship spins
into space.

EXTERIOR: SURFACE OF THE DEATH STAR.

Solo's ship moves in toward the Death Star trench.

INTERIOR: MILLENNIUM FALCON -- COCKPIT.

Solo, smiling, speaks to Luke over his headset mike.

HAN: (into mike) You're all clear, kid.

INTERIOR: MASSASSI OUTPOST -- WAR ROOM.

Leia and the others listen to Solo's transmission.

HAN: (over speaker) Now let's blow this thing and go home!

INTERIOR: LUKE'S X-WING FIGHTER -- COCKPIT.

Luke looks up and smiles. He concentrates on the exhaust port,
then fires his laser torpedoes.

EXTERIOR: SURFACE OF THE DEATH STAR.

Luke's torpedoes shoot toward the port and seems to simply
disappear into the surface and not explode. But the shots do
find their mark and have gone into the exhaust port and are
heading for the main reactor.

INTERIOR: LUKE'S X-WING FIGHTER -- COCKPIT.

Luke throws his head back in relief.

INTERIOR: DEATH STAR.

An Imperial soldier runs to the control panel board and pulls
the attack lever as the board behind him lights up.

INTERCOM VOICE: Stand by to fire at Rebel base.

EXTERIOR: SPACE AROUND THE DEATH STAR.

Two X-wings, a Y-wing, and the pirateship race toward Yavin in
the distance.

INTERIOR: DEATH STAR.

Several Imperial soldiers, flanking a pensive Grand Moff
Tarkin, busily push control levers and buttons.

INTERCOM VOICE: Standing by.

The rumble of a distant explosion begins.

EXTERIOR: SPACE AROUND THE DEATH STAR.

The Rebel ships race out of sight, leaving the moon-like Death
Star alone against a blanket of stars. Several small flashes
appear on the surface. The Death Star bursts into a supernova,
creating a spectacular heavenly display.

[Kevan]

So your ride was a bit like this:

EXTERIOR: DEATH STAR TRENCH.

Vader's wingman panics at the sight of the oncoming pirate
starship and veers radically to one side, colliding with
Vader's TIE fighter in the process. Vader's wingman crashes
into the side wall of the trench and explodes. Vader's damaged
ship spins out of the trench with a damaged wing.

EXTERIOR: SPACE AROUND THE DEATH STAR.

Vader's ship spins out of control with a bent solar fin,
heading for deep space.

INTERIOR: DARTH VADER'S COCKPIT.

Vader turns round and round in circles as his ship spins
into space.

EXTERIOR: SURFACE OF THE DEATH STAR.

Solo's ship moves in toward the Death Star trench.

INTERIOR: MILLENNIUM FALCON -- COCKPIT.

Solo, smiling, speaks to Luke over his headset mike.

HAN: (into mike) You're all clear, kid.

INTERIOR: MASSASSI OUTPOST -- WAR ROOM.

Leia and the others listen to Solo's transmission.

HAN: (over speaker) Now let's blow this thing and go home!

INTERIOR: LUKE'S X-WING FIGHTER -- COCKPIT.

Luke looks up and smiles. He concentrates on the exhaust port,
then fires his laser torpedoes.

EXTERIOR: SURFACE OF THE DEATH STAR.

Luke's torpedoes shoot toward the port and seems to simply
disappear into the surface and not explode. But the shots do
find their mark and have gone into the exhaust port and are
heading for the main reactor.

INTERIOR: LUKE'S X-WING FIGHTER -- COCKPIT.

Luke throws his head back in relief.

INTERIOR: DEATH STAR.

An Imperial soldier runs to the control panel board and pulls
the attack lever as the board behind him lights up.

INTERCOM VOICE: Stand by to fire at Rebel base.

EXTERIOR: SPACE AROUND THE DEATH STAR.

Two X-wings, a Y-wing, and the pirateship race toward Yavin in
the distance.

INTERIOR: DEATH STAR.

Several Imperial soldiers, flanking a pensive Grand Moff
Tarkin, busily push control levers and buttons.

INTERCOM VOICE: Standing by.

The rumble of a distant explosion begins.

EXTERIOR: SPACE AROUND THE DEATH STAR.

The Rebel ships race out of sight, leaving the moon-like Death
Star alone against a blanket of stars. Several small flashes
appear on the surface. The Death Star bursts into a supernova,
creating a spectacular heavenly display.


Happens to you too?!

[hybridbellbaske]

Actually Kevan, How do you know the "bug" was'nt a baby Alien? How's your stomach feeling? You better hope Sigourney Weaver is in town, otherwise you're in trouble!

P.S. Sorry Ginger- I see you've already made the Alien connection...

[Ginger]

Actually Kevan, How do you know the "bug" was'nt a baby Alien? How's your stomach feeling? You better hope Sigourney Weaver is in town, otherwise you're in trouble!

P.S. Sorry Ginger- I see you've already made the Alien connection...

S'alright, I was subtle.

[chuckroast]

This could not be more pathetic but I think about work frequently on solo bike rides. I've found I do my best strategic thinking out on the road. Insight seems to come best when all the other distractions fall away.

[Fixed]

"Get Out of My way Cab!"

"Use your Signal Mother *******!!"

"Look at that A*** parked in the Bike Lane!!!"

"Should I take the Brooklyn or Manhattan bridge. . . hmm, the cute girl on the bike went that way. . . ." (time elapses) "Hi, I'm Dan"

:beer:

On long road rides, I think about life, nature, all those peaceful things. A time and a place for everything.
bro you sound like me ..imho
cheers

[BBB]

Actually Kevan, How do you know the "bug" was'nt a baby Alien? How's your stomach feeling? You better hope Sigourney Weaver is in town, otherwise you're in trouble!

P.S. Sorry Ginger- I see you've already made the Alien connection...

Now you see if the bug was an Alien, Kevan is in big trouble and Sigourney Weaver is not going to be able to help him.

INT. MESS

The entire crew is seated.
Hungrily swallowing huge portions of artificial food.
The cat eats from a dish on the table.

KANE
First thing I'm going to do when
we get back is eat some decent
food.

PARKER
I've had worse than this, but
I've had better too, if you know
what I mean.

LAMBERT
Christ, you're pounding down this
stuff like there's no tomorrow.

Pause.

PARKER
I mean I like it.

KANE
No kidding.

PARKER
Yeah. It grows on you.

KANE
It should. You know what they
make this stuff out of...

PARKER
I know what they make it out of.
So what. It's food now. You're
eating it.

Suddenly Kane grimaces.

RIPLEY
What's wrong.

Kane's voice strains.

LAMBERT
What's the matter.

KANE
I don't know... I'm getting cramps.

The others stare at him in alarm.
Suddenly he makes a loud groaning noise.
Clutches the edge of the table with his hands.
Knuckles whitening.

ASH
Breathe deeply.

Kane screams.

KANE
Oh God, it hurts so bad.
It hurts. It hurts.
(stands up)
Ooooooh.

BRETT
What is it. What hurts.

Kane's face screws into a mask of agony.
He falls back into his chair.

KANE
Ohmygooaaaahh.

A red stain.
Then a smear of blood blossoms on his chest.
The fabric of his shirt is ripped apart.
A small head the size of a man's fist pushes out.
The crew shouts in panic.
Leap back from the table.
The cat spits, bolts away.
The tiny head lunges forward.
Comes spurting out of Kane's chest trailing a thick body.
Splatters fluids and blood in its wake.
Lands in the middle of the dishes and food.
Wriggles away while the crew scatters.
Then the Alien being disappears from sight.
Kane lies slumped in his chair.
Very dead.
A huge hole in his chest.
The dishes are scattered.
Food covered with blood.

LAMBERT
No, no, no, no, no.

[BBB]

Happens to you too?!

Well, I find the bugs end up in my eyes and seeing becomes a problem and then it is a case of (to continue the Star Wars theme):

BEN: I suggest you try it again, Luke.

Ben places a large helmet on Luke's head which covers his
eyes.

BEN: This time, let go your conscious self and act on instinct.

LUKE: (laughing) With the blast shield down, I can't even see. How am
I supposed to fight?

BEN: Your eyes can deceive you. Don't trust them.

Han skeptically shakes his head as Ben throws the seeker
into the air. The ball shoots straight up in the air, then
drops like a rock. Luke swings the lightsaber around blindly
missing the seeker, which fires off a laserbolt which hits
Luke square on the seat of the pants. He lets out a painful
yell and attempts to hit the seeker.

BEN: Stretch out with your feelings.

Luke stands in one place, seemingly frozen. The seeker
makes a dive at Luke and, incredibly, he managed to deflect
the bolt. The ball ceases fire and moves back to its original
position.

BEN: You see, you can do it.

HAN: I call it luck.

[BURCH]

I am a numbers guy so I mostly obsess about average speed, miles, estimating what the final trip speed will be when the ride finishes.

[Jeff Weir]

Kevan,

May the force be with you

[Sandy]

So this morning's ride to work, I swallowed a bug. Damn thing made me cough in reflex it was so…so…buggy. So annoying it is, washing it down with a chug of energy drink. My mind immediately went a stray, thinking about the many bugs I had been swallowing this summer, paying not a whole lot of attention to my safe-being on the narrow-shouldered roadway or progress in route, but consumed by potentiality that I just might be under attack! My mind having little else to do while I was getting myself through my commute continued. What if that bug wasn't a bug at all, but some sort of micro rebel fighter, purposely flying down my hatch intent on destroying a member of the evil empire? Us! From within?

Was it laying my inners to waste as I cranked? Or am I to be obliterated at any moment by a subatomic explosion like the alien mother ship from the film "Independence Day"?

Honestly guys, when I belched in contentment, my sudden breakfast, I could’a sworn I heard the Jolly Rodger cackle from within.

So what do you think about on your bike rides?


I think only about you!! :rolleyes: :rolleyes:



Smiling Sandy

[Fixed]

bro i think your on to something check this out
http://www.manataka.org/page160.html
cheers :beer:

[LesMiner]

Was it laying my inners to waste as I cranked? Or am I to be obliterated at any moment by a subatomic explosion like the alien mother ship from the film "Independence Day"?

Honestly guys, when I belched in contentment, my sudden breakfast, I could’a sworn I heard the Jolly Rodger cackle from within.

Maybe not a "Star Wars" experience more of an "Aliens" experience. Any strange pounding in your stomach?

[itsflantastic]

bro i think your on to something check this out
http://www.manataka.org/page160.html
cheers :beer:


I'm in!

[Samster]

A red stain.
Then a smear of blood blossoms on his chest.
The fabric of his shirt is ripped apart.
A small head the size of a man's fist pushes out.
The crew shouts in panic.
that was a good scene.