RIP Kelly Catlin

[Bruce K]

23 year old member of USA Cycling track team - also Rally Cycling Road team.

Multi medalist.

Apparent suicide.

Very sad

BK

[jpritchet74]

What the heck!!!

So sad!

[echappist]

she rode a helluva race to win the rainbow bands in the team pursuit

sadness...

RIP

[fiamme red]

She was also a graduate student at Stanford. Lots of potential cut short.

[makoti]

Oh, man. Way too young to have that kind of pain.

[OtayBW]

Aw geez - Presumably depression.....
Very sorry.

[rnhood]

Almost certainly depression, though it's still speculation at this point. Very sad news.

[nooneline]

I knew her from Minnesota racing.
She was incredibly gifted, on and off the bike.

For all: the National Suicide Prevention Hotline is 1-800-273-8255. Somebody will always answer.

[Matthew]

Dang, that's terrible.

[Blue Jays]

Wow, that is unfortunate news.

[ultraman6970]

THis sucks, hope they figured it out what was troubling her... if they not already know and dont want to make it public but at this point IMO wont hurt anybody to know. Actually it could help a lot of other people to read the signs...

[Tandem Rider]

Nearly every successful racer I have ever known has been riding away from their demons. Most of us make the escape, so sad hers were too big and too fast.

[fa63]

Being so good at so many things (Olympian cyclist, graduate student at Stanford, violinist, etc.) is a gift, but it can also be a curse due to the pressure/expectations that come along with it...

RIP, Kelly.

[Climb01742]

If only excellence brought happiness, too. Reading her interview in Velonews, it really seems she felt the pressure. So sad. Hope she’s found some sort of peace.

[XXtwindad]

So many lost to a disease that dare not speak its name. Time to make the mental health epidemic a priority.

[Bruce K]

According to a comment from one of her sisters, she suffered a concussion a few months ago and had not full recovered, suffering from some mental issues.

She also said she was feeling rather overwhelmed with everything she was involved and n.

I am sure we will learn more in the coming days.

BK

[Burnette]

Just read this:

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.washingtonpost.com/amphtml/sports/2019/03/10/us-olympic-cycling-medalist-kelly-catlin-dies/#scso=_Ip-FXPa7IoXm_QaQnZ6QCA24:0

About Kelly
"A graduate student at Stanford, Catlin was pursuing a degree in computational and mathematical engineering while training for track as a member of the national team and racing as a professional road cyclist."

From Jelly
“As athletes, we are all socially programmed to be stoic with our pain, to bear our burdens and not complain, even when such stoicism reaches the point of stupidity and those burdens begin to damage us. These are hard habits to break."




The signs are hidden sometimes but if you look hard enough you can see the pain. Just because the salmon is swimming hard against the current doesn't mean it isn't at the end if it's capacity to keep going against it.

Ask for help if you need it, it's not weakness, it'is to be human. Give help if you're asked for it and offer it freely if you even suspect there's a need for it. My heart goes out to all she left behind.

[Hawker]

So sad, prayers and thoughts to her family.

[fa63]

The article also mentions that she attempted suicide back in January, and that she was getting support from friends and family. But sometimes that is just not enough.

I have never had such dark thoughts, but my PhD took me to the brink of depression and it is no joke. Sometimes the support doesn't really help either; the brain is interesting in how it works. I imagine a concussion didn't help the matters either.

Just read this:

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.washingtonpost.com/amphtml/sports/2019/03/10/us-olympic-cycling-medalist-kelly-catlin-dies/#scso=_Ip-FXPa7IoXm_QaQnZ6QCA24:0

[nooneline]

goddamn.
that's some other information for sure.
i've known other people, too, for whom a TBI has led to suicidal depression.
really difficult.

[el cheapo]

Self inflicted stress and unable to cope. It's our way of life that contributes to this. Being a success can be bad for your health. How sad.

[fa63]

I am not sure it is fair to call it "self inflicted stress". Societal/external pressure can bear down hard, even on those strongest of mind. And like the linked article mentioned, I am sure her concussion/TBI did not help either.

I agree that we as a society often place too much value on "success". Sometimes a best life is one that is lived simply, and we need to make ourselves happy before we can make others happy. Easier said than done, of course...

Self inflicted stress and unable to cope. It's our way of life that contributes to this. Being a success can be bad for your health. How sad.

[soulspinner]

My heart goes out to the family of Kelly having lost my brother this way. The questions they are asking will never fully be answered, at least in this life...……...

[djg]

This is terribly sad -- my thoughts are with her family.

[echappist]

I am not sure it is fair to call it "self inflicted stress". Societal/external pressure can bear down hard, even on those strongest of mind. And like the linked article mentioned, I am sure her concussion/TBI did not help either.

I agree that we as a society often place too much value on "success". Sometimes a best life is one that is lived simply, and we need to make ourselves happy before we can make others happy. Easier said than done, of course...

while i wouldn't call it self inflicted either, one has to wonder how wise it is to be simultaneously enrolled in a difficult degree program at one of the most prestigious institutions while competing professionally as a cyclist. Each of the two is a full-time profession in its own rights.

My bet is that at any time, at least a quarter of the domestic students in math/science doctoral programs at the prestigious institutions are depressed. These institutions treat students as human resources, with the focus on the resource part. In more callous terms, it's an extraction and refining operation. The added stress from a professional job (while maintaining excellence on the track) is always going to be difficult.

[FlashUNC]

while i wouldn't call it self inflicted either, one has to wonder how wise it is to be simultaneously enrolled in a difficult degree program at one of the most prestigious institutions while competing professionally as a cyclist. Each of the two is a full-time profession in its own rights.

My bet is that at any time, at least a quarter of the domestic students in math/science doctoral programs at the prestigious institutions are depressed. These institutions treat students as human resources, with the focus on the resource part. In more callous terms, it's an extraction and refining operation. The added stress from a professional job (while maintaining excellence on the track) is always going to be difficult.

Calling into question the Life choices of someone who just killed themselves, with just the right amount of implied victim blaming.

Man, Paceline sometimes.

My condolences to her family and I'm sorry she didnt get the help she needed.

[echappist]

commenting that someone possibly made a commitment that is overwhelming does not detract from the tragedy of the situation. Saying the former does not imply that the departed deserved the latter. Each merits its own considerations.

For many (as in, at least 1/4), just being enrolled in a rigorous program is sufficient to induce mental disorder. Here was someone trying to excel in another job on top of that program.

[XXtwindad]

I'm not sure it's applicable to this young cyclists death, but there's a growing body of evidence that social media takes a toll on mental health, particularly in young people. The pressure to present a carefully curated existence can be very alienating.

[redir]

Such a tragedy for someone who was so bright and talented all around. I can't help but wonder how or if concussion played a roll in this. Just terrible.

[tctyres]

So sorry to read this. It's a tragedy.
May she rest in peace, and may her family and loved ones find comfort.

[fiamme red]

while i wouldn't call it self inflicted either, one has to wonder how wise it is to be simultaneously enrolled in a difficult degree program at one of the most prestigious institutions while competing professionally as a cyclist. Each of the two is a full-time profession in its own rights.Kelly Catlin journal: Trying to balance grad school and pro racing (VeloNews) (https://www.velonews.com/2019/02/rider-journal/kelly-catlin-journal-trying-to-balance-grad-school-and-pro-racing_483774)

Being a graduate student in Computational Mathematics is easy. Being a graduate student while simultaneously competing for the National Team on the track is often more difficult. It’s most difficult when you have to retake a three-hour final exam the moment you step out of the final round of a team pursuit. Being a graduate student, track cyclist, and professional road cyclist can instead feel like I need to time-travel to get everything done. And things still slip through the cracks.I don't know if she was going to school full time.

[josephr]

Calling into question the Life choices of someone who just killed themselves, with just the right amount of implied victim blaming.

Man, Paceline sometimes.



Hey Flash -- you're one of my favorite folks on here, but gotta say we're trying to open the conversation to ideas about what leads people to complete their self-initiated life ending events. Young adults put a lot of stress on themselves towards success --- to be the bicycle riding champ, to excel in STEM academics, to being the leader in their social organizations, etc. We cheer them on from the sidelines and 'support them in their push for self-improvement' etc...but unfortunately mental fatigue seems to beget a stress-induced hidden depression. Its hard in life to say "I'm done with this chapter." The whole fear of throwing it all away when you've come so far? Don't know what to do next? Is stopping something an admission of failure? Or just maybe the chemicals in their brain just don't know how to balance themselves? Psychiatry/psychology isn't an exact science, ya know. We're all just trying to feel our way around just like everyone else. ;)

[notsew]

The washington post article painted a pretty sad picture of her life when it came to cycling - between the lines anyways... A woman who was blessed to be good at everything, her brother harangued her into cycling, which she didn't love but excelled at, but created mounting stress and gave her a brain injury that her family implies led to this outcome. Just sad, sad for everybody. I can't imagine how triplets losing one of their own must feel. She probably would have been much better off in life if she'd not crossed passed with cycling.

[FlashUNC]

Hey Flash -- you're one of my favorite folks on here, but gotta say we're trying to open the conversation to ideas about what leads people to complete their self-initiated life ending events. Young adults put a lot of stress on themselves towards success --- to be the bicycle riding champ, to excel in STEM academics, to being the leader in their social organizations, etc. We cheer them on from the sidelines and 'support them in their push for self-improvement' etc...but unfortunately mental fatigue seems to beget a stress-induced hidden depression. Its hard in life to say "I'm done with this chapter." The whole fear of throwing it all away when you've come so far? Don't know what to do next? Is stopping something an admission of failure? Or just maybe the chemicals in their brain just don't know how to balance themselves? Psychiatry/psychology isn't an exact science, ya know. We're all just trying to feel our way around just like everyone else. ;)

I couldn't agree more. But there's also a way to bring up this issue that doesn't call into question whether someone who just committed suicide was "making a wise choice" when they decided what grad program to pursue, or what world-class track discipline they'd specialize in.

Academia as a meat grinder for mental health? Absolutely. High level sports pursuits? Need look no further than DeMar DeRozan and Kevin Love in the NBA to talk about what that means these days.

Maybe I am being pedantic, but I find it sloppily reductive to even inadvertently victim blame with some tired version of "Well, if only she didn't do X or Y, she wouldn't have killed herself."

Talking about the larger issue is absolutely worth having the discussion, but throwing it all in her lap is what grinds my gears. Mental health is absolutely worth a vigorous discussion about why stigma and policy in this country are terrible about it. But the discussion should be why the system fails Kelly and so many like her, not some implication that she screwed up because she was really into getting a grad degree.

[Joxster]

But the discussion should be why the system fails Kelly

Because as an Athlete you don't show failure ever, weakness is frowned upon and you're off the program. I was having a similar discussion with an ex-team mate, now coach on why most top riders are mentally in the bucket by the time they retire. Suicide rates are high, he was saying that training was akin to self harm and the endorphins created is the drug you crave. When you push yourself to strive to win, you are always hurting yourself and you put yoursel in a dark, dark place. But you get up the next day and do it again the next day, your high is standing on the top step of the podium, the second step is for the first loser. I've been there, I've struggled and at times I still do. The system will always fail the riders because the riders will never admit to there being a problem and will always mask the telltale signs.

[572cv]

A poignant take on this tragedy on RKP:

http://redkiteprayer.com/2019/03/for-kelly-catlin/

Other stories report two head injuries this past Fall, with concussions. A concussion is bad (experience, there) but the subsequent one, in short order, is very, very bad. Recovery from even one concussion can be difficult and lengthy. I don’t know what one can do to convince someone in that condition that things can improve if they are sufficiently patient. It’s your mind. For a while, it doesn’t feel as though it will ever be the same. Sincere condolences to her family and friends.

[nooneline]

My teammate left flowers at the NSC velodrome for Kelly.

[redir]

Professional cyclists don't make much of a living and even when they do it's a short one at that. Engineers however are easily employed with excellent salaries. I think she had made some fine choices.

You never know what people are going through. That's why this is so tricky. The outward appearance of jsut about anyone, all of us included, is often masked for whatever reasons. Some people live their entire lives this way.

But concussion can break loose a lot of problems. From personal experience a young women I used to ride with got one and her personality changed quite considerable. She has since recovered but still it was dark period in her life.

There are lots of things we don't understand even the ones who study this stuff.

[Lewis Moon]

RIP Kelly. So young, so full of promise, taken away too soon.

We're just exploring the tip of the iceberg on concussions. For too long it was a hidden injury. Symptoms can be all over the map. You often can't just "walk it off".
It's good that more riders have been coming forward with stories of their struggles. I wish we had a safety net that could have caught Kelly.

[OperaLover]

Kelly, I hope you found the peace you needed. To your family and friends, I hope you are able to find peace with this someday. Depression and suicide are epidemic.

If you find yourself in this dark place, reach out. You're not weak - you're strong. It takes strength to recognize and understand you need help and there is no shame or weakness in reaching out to others for that help. In your vulnerability there is power to accept and heal.

Been there did not do it.

[Red Tornado]

Very tragic indeed. Not on the same level, but seeing the stress my daughter has just with a double major and being VP of the transfer council at college makes me cringe at how she would have dealt with the added things Kelly was involved in. My daughter agreed last year to seeing a counselor for anxiety attacks and it helped quite a bit.
I personally know of several other college aged and young adult people who are just plain over committed. They have all experienced difficulty managing and required help to cope. Looks like Kelly had a ton and then some on her plate.
Maybe seeing the whole picture can be a benefit to others who are currently suffering the same thing, or who are maybe setting themselves up for that down the road. Also could be good for parents/friends to see and be able to recognize.
We finally had to tell our daughter she couldn't be all things to all people, and all things to herself, as well. A person can only do what they can do. The pressure to succeed at all levels and be very driven is intense on a lot of young people today. Could be self-imposed, pressure from parents or a combination. I hope this is a good wake-up call to a lot of people out there; and too bad it had to end like this.
Condolences to her family and close friends.

[oldpotatoe]

goddamn.
that's some other information for sure.
i've known other people, too, for whom a TBI has led to suicidal depression.
really difficult.

And often effective medication makes one 'feel good enough' to follow through with suicide. 'Effective medication', often gets the person out of bed but often does nothing to curtail thoughts of suicide. People who commit suicide are probably all "depressed" but not all depressed people have suicidal thoughts..
2 different, but related, issues.

Very sad tho...

-(BiPolar son)...

[-dustin]

A poignant take on this tragedy on RKP:

http://redkiteprayer.com/2019/03/for-kelly-catlin/

that was a fantastic article.

[Jaybee]

that was a fantastic article.

You get Padraig in the zone (which, sadly this is for him), and he is a fantastic writer.

[dddd]

I've often wondered about the pro athletes who suffer concussions, and who then have to get back to top-level performance a week or two later.
I figure that, at least, they have the all-around support of a pro team and the financial and other resources like really good doctors doing everything they can to make the athlete well again in the shortest possible time.

But, for the athlete who has two career lives going on, perhaps racing and schooling, both at a high level, where does the responsibility fall for the athlete's overall health when they already show the autonomy to split their efforts between the two careers?

Also, with a head injury likely requiring the injured to make adjustments to their "progress schedule", it can be a huge step down in terms of career just to make that small step down sufficient to allow a bit of extra recovery rest. One has to maintain a pro level of fitness training to be a pro racer after all, so it surely can be a really tough decision to have to make (to step down to the next level for a while).
And if the tbi is affecting one's judgement about such decisions (as it probably does in most such cases), there would seem to be a need for a support network in place to help guide the injured through the recovery period (and with such support system having good understanding of both of the athlete's careers).

This all should help people appreciate (rules) progress toward limiting the athlete's ability to resume competition following head injury. Having more time go by before resuming competition not only spares the brain from increased vulnerability before healing is complete, but might also keep an injured athlete from having another accident due to their temporarily-reduced physical coordination or soundness of judgement.

Editing here:
I've known a couple of road racers who "suddenly" started having concussive crashes on their bikes during events over a period of perhaps a few or several months. Both of them left cycling entirely for at least a few years after what I remember as being their third such accident.

[paredown]

Washington Post has the story that the family is donating her brain for research--they are quite convinced that her recent crashes (and concussion) led to behaviour changes:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/2019/03/12/cyclist-kelly-catlins-family-donates-her-brain-concussion-research/?utm_term=.f3c449822f21

[sailorboy]

I couldn't agree more. But there's also a way to bring up this issue that doesn't call into question whether someone who just committed suicide was "making a wise choice" when they decided what grad program to pursue, or what world-class track discipline they'd specialize in.

Academia as a meat grinder for mental health? Absolutely. High level sports pursuits? Need look no further than DeMar DeRozan and Kevin Love in the NBA to talk about what that means these days.

Maybe I am being pedantic, but I find it sloppily reductive to even inadvertently victim blame with some tired version of "Well, if only she didn't do X or Y, she wouldn't have killed herself."

Talking about the larger issue is absolutely worth having the discussion, but throwing it all in her lap is what grinds my gears. Mental health is absolutely worth a vigorous discussion about why stigma and policy in this country are terrible about it. But the discussion should be why the system fails Kelly and so many like her, not some implication that she screwed up because she was really into getting a grad degree.

And maybe there's also a way for you to raise this concern without sounding so trollish sometimes, is I think what people are saying to you. You often come off as trying to sound like the smartest guy in the room and being very dismissive and patronizing. Give it a rest.

[CunegoFan]

And maybe there's also a way for you to raise this concern without sounding so trollish sometimes, is I think what people are saying to you. You often come off as trying to sound like the smartest guy in the room and being very dismissive and patronizing. Give it a rest.

Yup. He'll misconstrue anyone's words to virtue signal.

[Bruce K]

Let’s try to stay on point and avoid the personal stuff.

BK

[fa63]

https://www.velonews.com/2019/03/news/inside-kelly-catlins-amazing-rise-and-tragic-fall_488383

[XXtwindad]

An excellent article on famous (male) athletes speaking out on the "stigma" of depression: https://headsupguys.org/22-male-athletes-speaking-depression/

[2LeftCleats]

https://www.velonews.com/2019/03/news/inside-kelly-catlins-amazing-rise-and-tragic-fall_488383

Good follow up article in VN. Some of it's pretty hard to read.

[fiamme red]

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/04/08/sports/kelly-catlin-death.html

[m_sasso]

Maybe not as well known as Kelly however we lost another one, former Canadian national team member Charlotte Creswicke, just 19?


https://cyclingmagazine.ca/sections/news/former-canadian-national-team-member-charlotte-creswicke-passes-away/?fbclid=IwAR3FzQSaK2Nq9i1vV0HDWMJXCn4J1m_w_yIlnTJ7 aUyXKggoe_Cr4ESjHA0

https://cyclingmagazine.ca/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/Charlotte.jpg

[OperaLover]

So sad . . . it's becoming epidemic.

[Hawker]

I wish we had a better understanding of what is going on. I'm older and we just never had this kind of thing when I was growing up in the sixties. So sad for families and loved ones.

[veloduffer]

Suicide is often more complicated than can be "debated" here on the forum. I have had family and friends that have experienced this. Mental illness is on the rise and under-resourced.

We need a better way for folks to access help early.

[XXtwindad]

I think one half of the equation is that depression, or "sadness" is stigmatized instead of being viewed as a perfectly normal part of life.

The other half of the equation is that "happiness" is viewed as the ultimate (and elusive) goal. Dozens of books are dedicated to this premise. It's the "Cult of Happiness."

Social media exacerbates this, to an extreme degree.

[-dustin]

I wish we had a better understanding of what is going on. I'm older and we just never had this kind of thing when I was growing up in the sixties. So sad for families and loved ones.
...

Social media exacerbates this, to an extreme degree.
it's a different world. in my humble opinion.

[hokoman]

I wish we had a better understanding of what is going on. I'm older and we just never had this kind of thing when I was growing up in the sixties. So sad for families and loved ones.

...

it's a different world. in my humble opinion.

I think it's a different world, but I'm going to guess that some of it has to do with the speed of news these days, and how readily available it is. 50 years ago, you wouldn't hear about things like this because it ended with the local news. Now, things go viral and everyone on the planet has access to it immediately. It is very depressing reading these stories, but that is also why I don't watch the local news, it is depressing.

[DRietz]

The article in the New York Times reads to me as though Kelly Catlin could have had some underlying mental illness besides depression, which was likely present far before her more recent head injuries.

Given the highly intelligent parents and the fact that she was a triplet, I would not be surprised if there was some sort of genetic component to this tragedy.

[fiamme red]

The article in the New York Times reads to me as though Kelly Catlin could have had some underlying mental illness besides depression, which was likely present far before her more recent head injuries.

Given the highly intelligent parents and the fact that she was a triplet, I would not be surprised if there was some sort of genetic component to this tragedy.The Times article mentioned some interesting things about her relationships with other people and her obsession with memorization:

Kelly Catlin also began to limit her social interactions to “robotic social motions,” as Catlin herself put it in the January note to family and friends. Around third grade, Catlin established her lifelong code to live by and included some of it in the note, which was shared with The New York Times:

Fear not physical discomfort. Never love. Never engage in a relationship that could be defined as having a significant other. (In my case, a so-called “boyfriend.”) Never allow yourself to become close enough to another that their actions or inactions might cause you (any amount of) distress or pain. If kindness and gentleness are at all an option, they are the only option.

“We all knew that she didn’t like to express her emotions,” Christine Catlin said. “She never really told anyone how she ever felt, until the very end, that is.”She was drawn to the science of cycling. She wasn’t comfortable with the social aspect of it. In the notes she wrote in her final weeks, she acknowledged not having many friends.

“It’s not that she didn’t want friends,” her brother said. “It was just a matter of priorities. And her priority was to be successful and respected.”

Like her siblings, Catlin could not stand to be hugged, family members said. She would rather bury herself in a book than chat with peers. She had a playful sense of humor — often dark humor — within her family circle, but rarely showed it to outsiders.She would remember dozens of license plates of cars passing her and would recite the number pi to hundreds of decimals, Colin Catlin said. She mapped out training routes in her head.I'm no expert, but it sounds to me like Asperger’s Syndrome.

[nooneline]

I think it might be a respectful move to stop speculative retroactive diagnosing Kelly over the internet.

[DRietz]

I think it might be a respectful move to stop speculative retroactive diagnosing Kelly over the internet.

Given your personal connection to Catlin, I understand where you're coming from. If you would allow me the same understanding, please realize that I mean no disrespect.

As someone who is in a continuing pursuit of a more thorough understanding of my own depression, and who has thought long and hard about the implications of mental illness in my family (alzheimer's, epilepsy, schizophrenia, addiction, and more), I brought up my speculation because I certainly wish that someone would have given more notice to the environment and the ways in which I grew up. I feel like had I found a word or a level of support for my inner turmoil at such a young age, I would have had more of an ability to overcome the dark moments when they mattered.

There is so much about us that is so telling. And it's unfortunate, in my mind, that people only start to connect those dots (as her parents tried to do, in autopsying her brain) once it's too late.

So, yes, while it might seem uncouth of me to try and figure out what was "wrong," I'm ultimately just trying to advocate for being present in the lives of people you care about.

[buddybikes]

>>I'm no expert, but it sounds to me like Asperger’s Syndrome.

I agree as parent of Asperger's adult. We can't determine anything now, other than we lost a great cyclist, mathematician and sure many other attributes.

I have worried about my daughter a bit, but fortunately she has found another brilliant Aspergers partner who understands how her brain functions. Frustrating as parents, not to know.

[fiamme red]

I think it might be a respectful move to stop speculative retroactive diagnosing Kelly over the internet.I didn't mean to diagnose her. But I have a hard time believing as her parents do, that all was well with her until she had a concussion, after which she became depressed and suicidal.

People who are socially isolated, as she was, are at a much higher risk of depression. Also, if she did have Asperger's, there was a study in The Lancet a few years ago that pointed to a significantly higher suicide risk in people with Asperger's.

https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lanpsy/article/PIIS2215-0366(14)70248-2/fulltext

"Our findings lend support to anecdotal reports of increased rates of suicidal ideation in adults with Asperger's syndrome, and depression as an important potential risk factor for suicidality in adults with this condition. Because adults with Asperger's syndrome often have many risk factors for secondary depression (e.g., social isolation or exclusion, and unemployment), our findings emphasise the need for appropriate service planning and support to reduce risk in this clinical group."

[fiamme red]

Interesting article: https://www.washingtonpost.com/sports/2019/07/29/kelly-catlin-death-cyclist/?utm_term=.2ae9680a65ff. She might have been helped by therapy, but she refused to go.

She suspected that she had major depressive disorder, though to her seeking therapy was another show of weakness. “I would rather suffer than ask for help,” she wrote, going on to describe her delight in the problems her death would cause Team USA and some thoughts about her upbringing.At one point, she filled four pages with her thoughts.
“Principle: If I am not an athlete, I am nothing,” she wrote at the end. “Principle: If I am in therapy, I have failed.”

[Hawker]

So very sad. As parents, siblings, friends....what do we do?

RIP Kelly.

[kiwisimon]

What do we do? I guess look at Kelly's life and use the lessons learned in it's sad conclusion to help others. Sincere condolences to her loved ones and I truly hope she is resting in peace.

[glepore]

Thanks for sharing the link. Perhaps the saddest thing I've read in a long time.

Reach out and hug the ones you love.

[SlowPokePete]

Just so sad.

SPP

[marciero]

Incredible story. Incredibly sad.

[mcteague]

Reading this line from her suicide note nearly broke me. After years of pushing people away and avoiding close human contact she wrote:

“I do desire to be valued, to be special, to have great power and responsibility. But, beyond all else, I desire ‘love and connection.’ ”

Tim