Repair ‘enabler’ - cure or continue?

[TBLS]

What to do....so I will vent a bit

How do you handle/support riders who don’t know basic repair skills, etc?

Riding partner of 30 years had a flat yesterday. He put in new tube after he ‘checked’ the tire, his pump didn’t work so I used my co2. 100 yards later second flat from missing item imbedded in tire, no second tube or patch kit (he just bought a patch kit but it is at home....)

Not the first episode (second this year with same scenario) and I have supported for years so unlikely to change but ever acceptable to leave to own skills to solve?

He falls into the thrifty category so will not invest in quality tools, pump, etc. I’ve gifted him a co2 cartridge and head but cartridges too expensive......

[AngryScientist]

Riding partner of 30 years

a friendship like that is worth a million bucks IMO.

i wouldnt sweat it about the incidental roadside repairs. some guys just dont have that portion of the brain enabled. same way as i will never be able to play the piano or paint a portrait. we all have things we are good at, and things we just can not do, and can not learn.

the few minutes you spend repairing his bike occasionally and the few bucks for a spare tube here and there are well worth a pal you've probably shared thousand of miles with.

[weisan]

I am thinking along the same line as angry.

30 years is 30 years. You can't just throw away a marriage like this!

[oldpotatoe]

What to do....so I will vent a bit

How do you handle/support riders who don’t know basic repair skills, etc?

Riding partner of 30 years had a flat yesterday. He put in new tube after he ‘checked’ the tire, his pump didn’t work so I used my co2. 100 yards later second flat from missing item imbedded in tire, no second tube or patch kit (he just bought a patch kit but it is at home....)

Not the first episode (second this year with same scenario) and I have supported for years so unlikely to change but ever acceptable to leave to own skills to solve?

He falls into the thrifty category so will not invest in quality tools, pump, etc. I’ve gifted him a co2 cartridge and head but cartridges too expensive......

Just abandon? "CYA Charlie, good luck" and ride away?

NEVER acceptable, change his tire, get back on bike..

Carry a pump, use that. Some just either can't figure simple stuff out or don't want to..bike ride, get back on the bike..30 years..

[peanutgallery]

Since I pretty much MTB all the time, it depends on who drove:)

Some folks are a walking disaster mechanically and I always help out if needed, but the cheap thing gets old in a hurry and is an entirely different category. Cheapskates get like a chance or 2 to wreck my ride with clapped out forks/wheels/brakes etc. and then you stop getting invited until you up your game and take care of your equipment. Unfortunately, when dirt is involved used XT off of Ebay is not much of an answer

For the record: tubes, quicklinks and air...but you're buying the beer and I will give you a hard time. No time for lax/cheap maintenance

What to do....so I will vent a bit

How do you handle/support riders who don’t know basic repair skills, etc?

Riding partner of 30 years had a flat yesterday. He put in new tube after he ‘checked’ the tire, his pump didn’t work so I used my co2. 100 yards later second flat from missing item imbedded in tire, no second tube or patch kit (he just bought a patch kit but it is at home....)

Not the first episode (second this year with same scenario) and I have supported for years so unlikely to change but ever acceptable to leave to own skills to solve?

He falls into the thrifty category so will not invest in quality tools, pump, etc. I’ve gifted him a co2 cartridge and head but cartridges too expensive......

[Ozz]

just make him pay for the CO2 cartridges....don't start the ride unless he has a $5 bill in his pocket

he will get the message

I figure that after 30 yrs you can tell him this without it being a problem

Or make him buy the beer/espresso after the ride....

[thwart]

Or make him buy the beer/espresso after the ride....

This.

I assume your friendship of 30 yrs outweighs some inconvenience along with a tube and CO2 cartridge on occasion.

But sometimes you just need to vent... and we're here for ya.

;)

[jr59]

It’s five bucks, so what! If it bothers you that much, find another to ride with.

Giving up a wingmate of 30years, over something so small, even if it happens three times a month is petty. The question is if it does happen that much, then why have you continued to ride with that person.

I ask everyone I see stoped on the side of the road if they are alright, and have given away so many tubes over the years, I have lost count. But that is the way I was taught to ride. Heck, even when I rode motorcycles, I stoped and made sure.

YMMV

[makoti]

I'll be honest...if he'd been doing that for 30 years to me, we wouldn't still be riding together. If you've made it this far, accept it & make him buy at the rest stop.

[Tony T]

Took ya 30 years to "vent" :)

[OldCrank]

I'd add this: try to add ideas to his"common sense quiver".

I wouldn't compare checking a flat tire for glass/nails/etc. to painting a portrait. I'd compare it to looking at your sandwich, and throwing it away if the bread is moldy.
Otherwise you're sick (walking home in the tire case).

But, yeah, a good riding bud is worth a spare tube or three.
Maybe a cheap multi-tool for his birthday...

[cfox]

If he is a good enough friend, the two of you should be comfortable enough for a "Dude...come on...you're killing me.." conversation.

I encounter this at the racetrack all the time. I draw the line at guys who are clueless, need help but have a willingness to learn versus the serial lazy/let someone else deal with it guys. The latter types are almost invariably cheap, too. Cheap is a character trait I have a hard time accepting.

[tv_vt]

Hopefully you are giving him sh-t while fixing his crap bike and telling him what a cheapf-ck he is, and yeah, he's buying you a muffin along with the coffee today, etc... :)
Don't let it get to you in a serious way. You know who you're dealing with if this has been going on for 30 years. There must be something else you enjoy about his company (good to draft behind, good with route finding, or whatever).

[prototoast]

I am lucky enough to have a wife who will ride with me. part of the deal is that I handle everything. She can replace a tube on her own if she has to, but I'll still do it when we're riding together. It's a small price to pay for having such good company on a ride.

So yes, I very explicitly consider myself to be "enabling" - but I think of that as a good thing. She wouldn't be riding at all if it weren't for me.

[zap]

One of my best buddies was known to ummm, carry spare tubes past prime. One century he had 4-5 flats. Long day. He's had flats on other rides. Also known to break bits, big strong fellow/weight weenie parts.

As noted he's a best buddy and one hell of a cyclist so the thought of leaving him behind never entered my mind. We talked about it (inner tubes) and he did a better job keeping his inventory fresher. He also progressed to sturdier bits.

[Spaghetti Legs]

I cook, my wife (of 22 years) “cleans” and on a regular basis I will get a pan out of the cabinet that was put in there after at best, a paper towel wipe down. I will grumble, some times out loud, then wash the pan and start cooking.

A long time riding partner is like a marriage and if it is otherwise enjoyable then you overlook the faults. BTW my wife doesn’t repair flats either, she doesn’t even take spares with her, but I don’t ride with her.

[verticaldoug]

I agree with peanutgallery. Cheap gets old in a hurry. I have no issues giving someone stranded a cartridge or a spare tube. I don't take money, just tell them to pay it forward.

I'd be tempted to tell him to call a car, but why not return the favor. Next time you have a flat with him, instead of using your stuff, just ask him for a spare tube for the one he took from you last time. See what he says....he'll give it to you, or else he is a real dick deep down and cut bait.

Even after 30 years. Never too late to make a change

My view is be generous to people in need but not to free loaders.

[josephr]

I've got a friend like this...hardcore political values too which differ from mine...soooo cheap, he'd ride $15 tires that have no protective layer and would tire liners instead. Got tired of dealing with the flats as road debris is pretty bad here, so I put on a couple of gatorskins on his bike and also stuffed his seatbag with tire/tube stuff, a multi-tool, and a quick-link. I've ridden with him 8 years now...its just part of it. :)

[cinco]

Please forgive my assumption, but since you brought it to a public forum...sounds to me like there is more to your sudden need to vent. This is someone whom you cannot just say to him that his behavior is inappropriate? You have to come to us to say it? Why? Are you afraid that he will not be able to handle your honesty? Sounds like a talk is all it would take. Might find that explaining first that your intent is not to insult or hurt his feelings can help prevent him from reacting irrationally. 30 years invested in a relationship is a lot to lose over what seems a misunderstanding about your expectations of him. Good luck.

Andy in Houston

[TBLS]

Thanks for all the comments. For the record, I would never abandon anyone on a ride.

Serenity now.....just needed to vent


Have tried the shaming and his wallet needs a crowbar to open....but our 30years of conversations riding have ranged from births, divorce, death of parents and would never trade.

[Tony T]

You'll always know what to get him on his B'day :)

[OtayBW]

I think that guilt and shame can be very (crude, but) effective behavior modification tools. :eek:
Maybe point out how silly and feckless he appears when he is solely reliant on you just to get home - and what would he expect to do in your absence....

Have tried the shaming and his wallet needs a crowbar to open....
Whoop! I just saw that you did. Well done! ;)

[colker]

Why would anyone go to an internet forum to decide if a 30yr friendship is worth over $5 or a flat tire help?
There is something wrong w/ the internet.

[dave thompson]

To the OP, I’ve got a friend very much like yours. Has ZERO mechanical skills, doesn’t know which end of a screwdriver points north. A helluva rider though, this weekend he’s in Port Elizabeth South Africa for the Ironman World Championships.

I’m tasked with setting up, repairing and maintaining his Ironman bike and his regular road bike. They’re in my garage shop semi-frequently getting fettled. For this he brings me a Starbucks cappuccino. And his friendship.

[Spaghetti Legs]

You'll always know what to get him on his B'day :)

A long, long time close friend of mine, who happens to be pretty well off, insists on using institutional level cheap single ply toilet paper in his house. I got him a 24 pack of Cottonelle super duper paper for his birthday once.

[chiasticon]

just fix it for him in the future, while lecturing him that "either I do it now or I do it later, after you've screwed it up..."

as someone mentioned above, it's like a marriage. I suck at cooking and my wife's awesome at it. I'm pickier with the dishes. to the point that I do as described above: "don't do the dishes. I will so that I don't have to re-do your job later." ;)

[Ralph]

There are people like that in every group. I just carry extra stuff for folks like that. Been riding with them too long to complain. We mostly just make jokes about it.

One of our long term riding buddies recently had a stroke. Hasn't really affected his riding, but Doc says no driving until side vision comes back....if it ever does. So we take turns picking him up for rides...and helping him thru intersections. No one really minds. Any of us could need help in some way some day.

[C40_guy]

A long, long time close friend of mine, who happens to be pretty well off, insists on using institutional level cheap single ply toilet paper in his house. I got him a 24 pack of Cottonelle super duper paper for his birthday once.

Yea, but which way is the roll installed? That's the deal breaker for me! :)

[charliedid]

To the OP, I’ve got a friend very much like yours. Has ZERO mechanical skills, doesn’t know which end of a screwdriver points north. A helluva rider though, this weekend he’s in Port Elizabeth South Africa for the Ironman World Championships.

I’m tasked with setting up, repairing and maintaining his Ironman bike and his regular road bike. They’re in my garage shop semi-frequently getting fettled. For this he brings me a Starbucks cappuccino. And his friendship.

Like

[saab2000]

I have friends, some of whom are actual friends and others who are more loose riding acquaintances, with whom I'd rather not ride because their bikes are always in poor repair and I've been on rides with these folks where we had 15+ minute stops to fix stuff that's totally preventable. It's super irritating and very selfish on their part.

Some of these folks don't even really know how a quick release lever works based on what I've observed. One didn't know what a front derailleur was. She rode exclusively in her small ring and the rubbing when riding in her 34x11 didn't bother her but it drove everyone else nuts. Shockingly, her Sram Rival front der was more or less frozen in place...... :rolleyes:

No, I'm not a dick to ride with but just like any group activity that is somewhat interdependent, there's a minimum requirement to participate. Nobody would think of showing up for a long, group hike with sandals and no water right? Showing up unprepared for a group ride, or with one other person, is the same thing. And being prepared means having a basic understanding of a few mechanical things on a bike like derailleur adjustment and how to fix a flat tire and keeping a chain oiled. It's not hard.

Don't be that person.