OT: Your 5 "Now I Get It" Moments

[Fat Robert]

The "Now I Get It" -- when you see it done so well and so perfectly it blows you away and gives instant, comprehesive understanding....


5) Seeing Husker Du in December '84 (actually being on the same bill): "so that is how you play this punk rock stuff...."

4) Getting lapped by Volker Diehl and Bob Mionskie in a crit...passed me like I was standing still: "so that's what a bike racer is...."

3) Talking to Alisdair McIntyre: "so this is a smart guy...I'm no smart guy...."


2) That point when I finally figured out that students are people before they are students.

1) When I finally figured out how to be decent to my wife. still don't know how that happened....one day she says "you've become the sweetest person." I have? ***? But now I'm thinking...how do I keep this up?



Honorable mention: seeing a brand-new Sachs frame...and riding a Peg....

[Samster]

. :beer:

[davids]

...d@mn you, FR. I spent my measly lunch hour thinking about this:
1974: Kissing a girl, for real. One moment I was a nervous, peer-pressured kid. The next, I understood that there was another, broader world of desire and passion. 1979: Failing French 102. It showed me that my life went on, even when I failed. I needed that experience of failure, so I could put myself at risk. 1983: Reading Thomas Khun’s “The Structure of Scientific Revolution.” This work lead me to understand that science is a process, not a set of facts, and that nature is a mystery that we struggle to describe. 1985: Hearing the same record, played through the same electronics and speakers, from two different turntables (one a mid-priced direct drive, one a belt-driven entry-level high end model.) I knew I wasn’t going to hear a bit of difference, and proceeded to have my world turned inside-out. OMFG, design and construction matters! This began my career as a connoisseur. 2001: Riding my Gary Fisher Tassajara up a suburban street, and suddenly realizing that I couldn’t just cruise around. I needed to push myself physically – I literally thought the words, “If I’m not getting stronger, I’m getting weaker.” I was on my way to becoming a cyclist.
Three to add, ‘cuz I can’t quite shake this topic:
1979: The first time I listened to London Calling: A sophomore in college, I was such an effen Punk, and here came the newest from the Kings of Punk. My friend Regina got one of a handful of the freshly-minted imported versions, first to arrive stateside and hit Ann Arbor. We had to get to class, and only had time to listen to one track. I quickly scanned the titles, and suggested the last song on side 4, “Revolution Rock”. I’m thinking, this should kick @ss… If you know the vinyl version, you know what we heard – “Train in Vain”, the bonus track, with Mick Jones channeling Jackie Wilson over the funkiest hook I’d ever heard. That record changed my life, opening my eyes to history of rock ‘n roll, and to the value of things that had happened before my time and outside my experience. Made me more humble, made me wiser, opened my eyes.
1994: The first day my infant daughter went to daycare: It had been lurking outside my consciousness, and all of a sudden I was aware of it: She is never out of my mind – some part of me is always keeping tabs on her, always thinking about her welfare. Standing on the Park Street Red Line platform, I suddenly knew what it meant to be a parent.
2002: Sitting on my couch, reading something really fascinating and thinking, “Dad will really think this is cool…” and suddenly being hit with the full, terrible impact of his death four weeks earlier. He was gone, and I would never talk to him, never see him again. I sat and cried, and knew true, irrevocable loss.
I can’t say I had a “moment” with the love of my life – When I first felt her pull, I was a 16 year old dimwit. I couldn’t have conceived that the bubbly, cute girl who spirited me away to go shopping for her cousin’s birthday would end up sharing my life. What eventually happened unfolded over years. Hey, it’s still unfolding.

[Bradford]

1) The first time I played hockey with a couple of guys who eventually made the NHL...and realized I was not going to make the NHL.

2) When I realized I was smart enough to get into college without needing a hockey scholarship if I would just study a little.

3) My first long bike ride--MS ride to Woodstock-- and I realized A) how much I loved riding distance, and B) there is something on a bike my body is actually built for.

4) The coverstation I had with my father a few hours before he died, when I realized how important it is to look back on your death bed and say that you have no regrets.

5) The first time I held my son.

[Kevan]

1. It's better to know how to swim when you play around in a swimming pool.

2. Give pizza a few minutes to cool before shoving the molten cheese into your yap.

3. Turn on the bathroom light when standing to pee.

4. Books can feed you the sex, profanity and violence your parents wouldn't allow you to enjoy in films.

5. Having passion is important, very important. But having money is MORE important.

[swoop]

1) seeing Nirvana in a small venue and having the hair on the back of my neck stand on end the whole time. thinks to self: oh, real rock and roll is dangerous. literally. i felt like i was watching a bomb with it's fuse lit....

2) riding with karsten kroon and having him take an inside line underneath me on a high speed sharp mountain turn, with one hand on his bars, looking at me and still mid conversation asking me what i did for a living. his body was against mine, there was no space to bail, i was scared to death, we were going 40 something through the turn, and he was underneath me at an impossible angle and it was nothing to him. just small talk with gesticulations and laughs.

3) having harm jenson sit on my wheel in a sprint to give me advice and realizing that while i was going as hard as i could.. he was just sitting there spinning (43 miles an hour) and he hadn't even jumped yet.

4) sitting on rahsaan bahati's wheel as he took a ten minute pull at 33 mph and never for a second looked like he was pushing it. it was like riding behind a morocycle. i kept trying to figure out where the power was coming from because he's so damn skinny.

5) watching max sciandri spin a 53x 11 on pch with no effort. from behind he looked like a mountain lion on a bike. lean, low, long and built to kill you.

6) seeing cary ford's position on his new peg and realizing.. that although dario's bikes look gorgeous.. it's really about how he makes the bike sit under you that makes things that special. the frame is just a means to a position. hell of a nice means though.

stuff like that.

[spiderlake]

I'll give this a stab.....

5. Realizing that my Dad was right on so many levels and topics. An example - rank has its privileges.... learned when I was in the Army and made Sergeant. He was career Navy and always said that when I was growing up.

4. Using a computer with a modem for the very first time. Logging into Compuserve and then launching into a whole new world. I got it and still live it.

3. Waking up one morning in Lloret de Mar, Spain (after nearly two years traipsing around Europe after high school) and knowing at that very moment that I needed to come back to the States and start my life. A very vivid moment of clarity. Joined the Army two days later.

2. Figuring out a fairly complex problem in college regarding network infrastructure and design. It was one of those "student becomes the master" moments. Seriously.

1. This is an easy one. Looking at my wife on our wedding day and knowing I have a great life that is only going to get better. This "I get it moment" happens on a daily basis.

[Archibald]

1. In 1986 as I lay badly injured on the ground, I realized for the first time that life was a party you could get evicted from. Until then I considered myself bulletproof with fairly good reason.

2. In 1989 I was living & working in North Africa and I realized how lucky I was, and the priveledges I experienced, based simply on where I was born and the color of my skin. The inverse was that I also learned how it felt to be a minority and to be hated based simply on the where I was born, the color of my skin, and my assumed religious preferences. It changed my behavior and my way of considering my fellow humans. People are the same everywhere you go. Don't be afraid of them.

3. In 1993 I, along with 210 other souls, were cut off from the rest of the world, and experienced a storm where we had hurricane force winds for more than 3-days with winds gusting over 100-knots. We had people lost, we had fires, we lost power, we had buildings blown away and literally disappear, we had extreme cold, and yet we all pulled together and made it through with no loss of life though risks were taken at every turn. That experience changed how I looked at other people and it changed my politics. Everybody IS important no matter how much money, education, or social status you have or don't have. Everybody matters.

4. In 1998, after living a life that oddly paralleled that of my father's at every turn, simply a generation apart, I had realized that I had finally become him. If you respect and admire your parents, you will become them.

5. In 2006 while watching my son race, I realized that though I'm a good rider, I have no talent for it. Some people are born to things. Hard work and dedication pale next to natural talent.

I could go on, but I don't want to drag my wife into this den of inequity! :banana:

Picture reference for #5

[shinomaster]

5 Leaning how to make a korean style vase on a potters wheel (it's hard yo)
4 Meeting a living treasure for pottery (Shimaoka Tatsuzo) He laughed at me!
3 (doin) it with my first girlfriend and the second....etc...
2 moving to Portland oregon from Boston (girls are nice? ***)
1 buying a Cannondale caad 4 for $275...bikes can be fast I thought

[1centaur]

1) The moment in college in my sophomore year when a minor acquaintance said, "But you could get all As if you wanted to, right?" I asked myself if I wanted to, and then I did, in every class for the rest of my college career. Number one in my major. Got me into graduate school. Got me a job in my chosen field. Changed my life.

2) When a woman I knew I really loved, a first for me, told me it was not right for her, and one brutal, introspective day later I said "Well I'm going to love you anyway, because I have no choice." That honesty, strength and conviction impressed her, she told me later. I married her. I am still married to her, 23 years later. The truth counts.

(Funny and true story, to tell you how lucky I am to have her - she and I were walking through a parking lot in Fremont, CA in 1986 and a yahoo in a pick-up drives by and his voice comes out the window, "What are you doing with HIM?" She just laughed.)

3) Not long after my son was born, I realized nature, not nurture, is the prime determinant.

4) My father, a non-exerciser, died and my co-worker said I should ride a bike with him as he re-habbed his knee. I rode my bike for the first time in 20 years. I kept riding, because I wanted to live a longer and healthier life than my father. Changed my body, changed my determination, changed my understanding of the payoff of process, made me stronger in many ways. Changed my life. Did not ride with the co-worker until 2 weeks ago, five years after he asked, because I so quickly moved beyond his goals and he was intimidated.

5 a and b

a) Saw a drama on the BBC in England when I was 10 that showed someone dying of a heroin overdose after choking on her own vomit. Swore that would never be me. Never did drugs.

b) The day I read some pamphlet in high school that said alcohol kills thousands of brain cells. I figured I had none to spare. Have not touched alcohol since then.

[Archibald]

b) The day I read some pamphlet in high school that said alcohol kills thousands of brain cells. I figured I had none to spare. Have not touched alcohol since then.
"Well, ya see Norm, it's like this....A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kill brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

[manet]

times up

[ti_boi]

1....when my 4th grade teacher Mr. Hathaway took me aside after class one day and said...in regards to the early developer/rich Dr.s son in my class...you have 'everything' he does and don't forget that.....(that one took years to understand)....but at the time it meant a lot.

2....when I didn't letter my freshman year in high school because I skipped the city swim meet at the end of the year (when everyone 'wins') and attended a Bruce Springsteen Concert in the Checkerdome in St. Louis. When the coach berated me I told him that I 'needed Bruce more than that letter'....

3....when I was in a very lucid state late one night in Bowling Green, Kentucky staring at the neck of my guitar and my roomate/band mate asked me if I knew the guitar had two necks....and contained octaves at each end...my playing improved exponentially over night....later that year riding though the Barren River area on my Super Le tour with my rugby teamates...stopping by the fraternity house where everyone looked like they had 40 year-old bodies...with huge beer guts...only to have someone remark...so that's how you keep yourself so fit....it's what you do in the off hours that matter, no?

4....When my wife (date at the time) came back to see me at my apartment in Florida after a night of rollicking fun...and she brought me a cold bottle of water....it was a little gesture but showed me something great about her that to this day persists in a wonderful way.


5....When my little girl looked into the room after he emerged from the womb with those big blue eyes ablaze...and then proceeded to scream at the top of her lungs! I knew then that someone very important had just landed on the planet!

[saab2000]

More than 5....

In no particular order....

- kissing a girl, maybe other stuff too....

- Riding with my buds in Switzerland. There are them and there are the rest of us, at least when it comes to the 'hills'.

- Watching Beat Breu ride away from some names in 94 or 95 in the Swiss National Championships for cyclocross. A real rider. Passionat and it did not matter if he was a little climber or not. Most definitely the 'People's Choice' in Swiss cycling.

- Riding with Bob Mionske and watching him yell at everyone. What a p***k. But fast.

- Riding a dude right off the old wheel of the Grandis in 89 or 90 who kept laughing at me and peeing me off. Feels good.

- Getting dropped by Wust at 1991 Super Duper Week and deciding that was not going to be how it all ended and catching back up.

- Racing for real in Switzerland and realizing that Super Duper Week was the minor leagues and that the Amateurs there are faster than the 1s and 2s at Super Duper Week. It's a wakeup if you think you are cool

- Watching Gaggioli from the back wheel. I liked him. He was fast and a good guy. Knew where his bread was buttered.

- Landing in a huge crosswind in Stuttgart one day and the captain said, "yeah, I guess you know how to do that".

- Scaring the crap out of myself a couple times in the airplane. Maybe or maybe not with paying passengers on board............ :D

- Getting divorced. Not cool, but surely eye-opening. I would never wish it upon my worst enemy. (PS - The ex-Mrs. Saab2000 and Mr. Saab2000 are still very good friends. Thankfully.)

- Realizing that cycling and bikes in the grand scheme of life just don't matter. This is big.

- Watching one of my best friends from college, who could not be more opposed to the current situation, do his duty and go to Iraq 'cuz that's what he signed up for 15 years ago. He does it 'cuz it is his duty to follow the civilian leadership, not 'cuz he agrees with it. I hope he comes home OK. PS - He owns a set of tubular wheels because I told him they are better. He is also a father of two and a husband, making the tubular wheels seem pretty effin' absurd in the grand scheme of things. See previous point. It sucks watching a real bud go off to something like this.

- Living in France and finally realizing we are not alone here on this ball of dirt, even after having grown up with that my whole life in the 'enlightened, international' family.

- Losing 30 lbs in 1987 and running and lifting weights and riding races like they were rides to the park in 1988. Body fat matters. A lot.

- Maybe more......

[obtuse]

i don't get it.....but i'll give it a shot. in no particular order.

-joining a bike club because my family had just moved to belgium and i didn't speak the languages, didn't have any friends and my folks had ruined my summer and ruined my life. fast forward six years and my folks left belgium without me and i stuck around and tried to see how far the bike thing would take me....top thirty in alot of races you've never heard of. finished some you may have....learned the frucking language though.

-that first time i really suffered on a bike; and felt like just throwing the bike into a ditch; my lungs were about to be puked out of my mouth and i couldn't feel my legs....i was holding the wheel of a 50km/h single file pace line on a shi'itey cow path in hoelliert belgium with my father on the side of the road cheering for me....all i wanted to do was fall into him and cry...i attacked instead. my brain felt like it just clicked and stopped working and it felt great.

-reading minima morali; reflections from a damaged life- somehow the most depressing book in the world put alot of things in perspective and made me feel super smart....which made me feel good. "no more innocence just sycophants to kiss us oh i really miss them..." to quote these animal men.


-meeting the future missus.....love at first sight; for real yo.

-buying a bass guitar...it gave me a fall back occupation after giving up the bike race thing where tall, lanky and stupid looking was also a sought after visage. same amount of drugs-more ladies-better outfits.

-getting back on a road bike after four years of not touching the goddamn thing after coming back from europe to america and going to school two years older than the rest of my freshman class and swearing never to ride the godam(n) contraption again.....it's still difficult to convince myself to race for real but eh, we all have our own mental illness at some level.

obtuse

[wwtsui]

- The moment I realized that I couldn't imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone other than the one I was with at the time, and going off to get get an engagement ring the next day. That was almost exactly 18 years ago. Best decision I ever made.

- The moment 18 months ago when my wife paged me in the middle of a business meeting when things had been kinda crappy at work, to tell me the doctor had just called to tell her the results from the biopsy a few days earlier: breast cancer. I know it's cliche, but if you really think the most precious thing in your life might not be around as long as you had always dreamed about, it puts a lot of things in perspective in a hurry. I work hard every day to try not to forget that lesson, to savor the moments we have as a family, get and give a few extra hugs, and yes, leave work a bit earlier to squeeze one more ride in before the weather turns...

- The moment one of our kids first reminded me of my wife (our son's laugh when you really tickle him), or of my mother (our daughter's rebellious streak), or of me or any of the other grandparents. Dunno what's nature and what's nurture, but wow.

- Cleaning out my parents' apartment and finding the things they had saved and were sentimental about -- their letters to each other fifty years and two continents ago, all sorts of reminders about how hard they had worked and saved, etc., etc. -- and realizing just how lucky I am to have had them as parents.

- Last but not least, waking up Memorial Day weekend ten years ago, realizing that with my wife's water had just broken in her first pregnancy, and realizing that life was about to change, for better and for worse, forever (or however long we have around here...)


P.S.: FR, great topic!

[J.Greene]

5. 130 gram silk dugast track tubs, the pinnacle of what a bike can roll on.

4. when my 7 year old son says "Dad, I can take it from here".

3. The birth of my 1st son. I knew instantly why my dad never slept when I was out of the house on weekend nights.

2. The pain of watching a family member slowly die, and doing it till the end with grace and concern for those around him.

1. When my wife laughs uncontrollably. It's a reminder why we are together, why we are a family, and why I look forward to sunrise. To laugh like that is one of the true gifts of life.

[Elefantino]

Just wanted to say that I have read, with great interest, all of your posts and am really moved and impressed.

This is a group of excellent people, not just excellent bike riders (present company excluded), and I hope to be able to meet more of you.

Mike

[trophyoftexas]

NOW I GET IT!....first saw the post and thought "more crap" but NOW I get it.....so many posts here that have parallels in my own life that I can hardly believe it, guess I just didn't have the awareness to recognize them or the skills to express them in words, thanks to all that have posted here and shared their/our experiences!

[soulspinner]

What big E said. This is an exceptional place. Be thankful.

[William]

Growing up watching how hard my mom struggled to support my sister and I financially, spiritually, and morally when my dad walked out.

Deciding to go on to college when life seemed to be heading nowhere.

Meeting my wife in college.

My son being born.

My daughter being born.

Though I've had some hairy experiences in life, these are the things that I think of most.



Thank you for sharing every one.


William

[ti_boi]

This has become my online sanctuary...and a motivational place where my riding goals always sit in the back of my mind...... :beer: :cool:

One more 'moment' to share: I was at a typical sales convention for a fortune 500 company. After 10 years of stuff like this it was getting very old. Motivational Speakers, Group Exercises in Strategy of the Sale...testimonals from others about the firm. Dinners with strangers.

I was sitting in a hot tub on a cool January night in Scottsdale, AZ watching an airliner move from one side of the black, starry desert sky to the other.

I realized at that precise moment that the plane was my life moving across the sky. The path of the jet was movement through life. And if I ever wanted to 'teach' I would have to do so soon...within 3 years I would be teaching and this year I earned tenure. I have never been happier. Ever.

[Tom]

This is weird. I read this yesterday, mused about it on the ride today, read it again today and realized I have never had a now I get it moment.

To a lesser or greater extent everything that ever happens leaves me puzzled.

I always am left asking is it real, what was it, how did it happen, how does it work, and always: why?

If I ever get the answer to one single thing I guess I'll be happy but if I ever stop asking myself questions I'm going to get worried.

[Len J]

5.) Running thru the pain for the first time & realizing that there was a place between Pain & Collapse where I could function at a high level......& that finding this place was the difference between winning & just finishing.

4.) Reading a book (12 Characteristics of Adult Children of Alchaholics) that described my innermost, most protected feelings and realizing for the very first time in my life that I was not unique, defective or most importantly alone in the world.

3.) One day with my father realizing in a blinding insight, that he was not capable of being the father that I wanted/needed him to be....he just wasn't capable!.......and realizing that my expectations of him were as big a problem in our relationship as his inability.

2.) Looking into my newly born daughters eyes......and realizing how deep love could be & how poweful the protective instict is.

1.) Looking into my wife's eyes at our wedding and realizing....really understanding, that I was no longer alone in the world......that someone really loved me for who I was, warts and all.

Len

[bcm119]

I guess tragedy impresses me more than talent because I can only think of one "I get it moment"... and unfortunately it has to do with 9/11. I'm a new yorker at heart and love that city more than any other, but I hadn't been directly affected by it and I wasn't "feeling" what happened after a few weeks; I was still numb to it. So I visited the city, and right after I got off the train in Grand Central, I saw the hundreds of hand written messages from people looking for their loved ones... and the pictures of them during happier times. And then it all hit me at once... suddenly I "got it". It amazes me that I couldn't "get it" until that point.

[SponsorsWanted]

I'm only 19 so my only I get it now moments are going to pale in comparison to the others' but here goes. One is cycling related and one is just life.

-Getting bullied around a crit course by a 6'7'', 250pd. guy that would be more at home drinking protien shakes and looking at himself in the mirror at a gym than punishing that poor bike. Lap after lap he pushed me to the outside of corners and grabbed the best spots in the pace line with brute force. At the end of the crit I beat him in the sprint by more than four bike lengths. Never has victory been so brutaly complete in my eyes.

-Reading the eulogy my aunt wrote before she died of lung cancer to her family and friends at her funeral. Watching her husband and children bawl when I read the messages she left for them made me realize how inconsequential so many things that I make a big deal about are...

[znfdl]

1. When my mother died suddenly when I was 9 years old, I realized that the world can be a painful place.

2. The day that I kissed my wife for the first time, I realized that the world can be a wonderful place, now 18 years later and 2 great children it is still wonderful.

3. When I moved from Virginia to California, I realized that moving away from good friends is not good. I was much happier after I moved back to Virginia

4. That few things compare to an incredibly complex bottle of wine.

5. That riding in the zone is incredible and being able to ride in the zone for 400 miles is an experience that I will never forget.

[slowgoing]

I lost all seven scholarship offers when I suffered a season ending injury my senior year of high school. Made me appreciate the “what have you done for me lately” saying at an early age. Gave up the sport and worked my way through the local university instead.

Realizing that I’m a crammer and don’t need to waste my time reading or studying weeks in advance. Truly liberating. Felt like learning how to breathe underwater.

[Climb01742]

reading "of mice and men" and crying and realizing that great writing didn't have to be complicated, tortured or arty.

having my mother die and honestly not feel that much and have my dog die and feel a great deal more and realize that our hearts are very complicated, tortured and not that arty.

riding on a warm summer night at twilight and realizing that nature may be the most beautiful thing in life.

seeing my daughter and realizing that parenthood can make us feel better and worse than we have ever felt.

getting married, getting divorced, then falling in love again and realizing that liking your beloved counts for more than loving your beloved.

[TimB]

in no order

- realizing that my parents, though not how I wanted them to be, were simply doing the best they knew how. Now, later, I realize they actually did pretty well at most things, and must have made untolled sacrifices to provide my siblings and me with the best home they could.

- having my HS swimming coach call me his "Captain's Captain" during our awards banquet my senior year. My parents, despite my most adamant pleas, were not in attendance. I'd had a disappointing year, beset with illness and injury, and was the only of our quad-captains not to make the state meet. He arranged for me to get a deck pass as his assistant coach to make the trip. I still have it. Enough said.

- the first time I said something to one of my children and heard my father's voice come out.

- my dad telling me, "Sometimes a man has to do things he doesn't really want to do," as I reluctantly considered a move from MN to MD for a job after being unemployed for six months. This is the only real 'advice' he has ever offered in me in my life, and was his way of gently guiding me to accept the job and challenge of moving alone across country to start a new life.

- the first time I rescued a drowning swimmer. Me, between life and death.

- holding my older daughter for the first time was a truly out-of-body experience. The mingling of joy, fear and pride is something impossible to explain.

[neverraced]

...enduring just another endlessly boring day in the bakery---and then the pilot's wife walked in.

[pale scotsman]

Seeing the wee pale scotsman coming out of the delivery room.

[goldyjackson]

In no particular order...

- having childeren, though not right at the beginning. It took some real time and experience to have it sink in how big a change it is, and how special it is to watch someone grow up.

- reading something that makes me realize how common our experience as humans can be. (This includes reading other people's lists on this topic). I'm always blown away at how consistent the questions we ask are, how they keep coming back time and time again. We just find new ways of asking and answering the same questions. I find great comfort in finding someone else who has struggled through the same ambiguities of life I have.

- being told that my oldest son (at 18 months old) had mild autism and would be lucky to go to a normal school and possibly even live on his own. It made me realize how much of what I wanted for him was for me myself.
--only 4 and a half years later, watching him get on the bus for school. He's made amazing progress. So much so that he has no diagnosis whatsoever--(he's a smart, charming young boy!)

- living with my beautiful wife long enough to watch her deal completely with the loss of both of her parents. Her dad died almost 10 years ago now, and her grief, though farther under the surface, is still there today. It never really leaves.

- meeting my birth mother when I was 27 (I was adopted when I was 2 weeks old). I finally had answers to questions I thought I would die not knowing the answer to, including, but not limited to, "what are you?" (answer, half Italian, half Ukranian). It also put my relationship with my parents into great perspective. Hands down, the most overwhealming experience of my life.



I humbly submit these, mostly out of a sense of lurking obligation. I've been so interested in reading other people's, that it's only fair to post mine...

[djg]

Interesting posts. But back to me: One thing I like about this post is that it’s caused me to realize, upon reflection, and contrary to my off-the-cuff guess, that I have learned at least five things. Here are six (sorry) in roughly chronological order:

(1) Good at sports and great at sports are not the same thing: I was a decent regional caliber tennis player growing up. One year of college tennis easily could have been four under slightly different circumstances. So this one time, at ba... no, at a tennis tournament, I went into the field house (at Dbrk's University of Rochester actually--they were hosting a qualifying tourney for the nationals) where some kids were killing time between matches out of the sun. A few guys were tossing a ball around and, after a bit, there was a seriously errant throw. This one kid turned and flew at the netting separating the field area from the track. The move seemed instantaneous, inhuman--mutual of Omaha, gazelles spooked by the scent of a lion kind of thing. He took several strides toward, and then up the netting, pivoted and caught the ball over his shoulder, and came back down to the field surface--smooth, easy, nary a misstep. I was a bit streaky and maybe something of an underachiever. Up until then, I wondered how good I might get if I got it together. But at that moment I knew: I was never, ever going to move like that.

The kid in question was a couple of years older than I was. I asked my friend Marty who it was and he was surprised I didn't recognize the guy: "That's Johnny McEnroe."

(2) Teenage campout just after my 16th b'day. Girl named Sue. Details unimportant, but, in terms of affect, think of Madeline Kahn, in Young Frankenstein, singing "Oh, Sweet Mystery of Life ...."

(3) Sheesh but I’m lucky—a lesson reinforced numerous times: some old photos dad kept in a cigar box I found when I was three; a trip to Haiti twenty years later; etc.

(4) Sometimes second best stinks: A long time ago in a relationship far away … so after six years together there’s a phone call from Florida. She doesn’t love me anymore, she wants out, and by-the-way, and this isn’t part of it because it wasn’t that good, she slept with another guy. Long distance may or may not be the next best thing to being there, but if it is, next best doesn’t always cut it. It’s alright now. Way in the past and we’ve both moved on and everybody’s better off. And at least she didn’t call collect.

(5) The miracle of life: The first kid, and then again two and three. The shock of the birth. The sheer importance of the critters. Amazing.

(6) End of the line: Dad’s decline and death five years ago is a lesson I still struggle with. I’m not sure what I learned. Many things and nothing. There’s the pity and the sorry and the guilt and the loss, and then the rest of it.

Ok, just to end with something less grim, 7: Even folkies can be guitar gods way above my head: the first time I saw Richard Thompson play live ...

[old_school]

Being told by a team of doctors that there was nothing more they could do for me and that I was to be transferred to a facility that would try to keep me as comfortable as possible.

Being released from the hospital after having spent a total of 13 months as an inpatient only to be given 99:1 odds that I would be back. (More of an FU moment, but it kept me going)

Seeing my dad die of cancer and realizing that I had exactly .07 seconds to grow up and get my act together.

The day I no longer felt shame or embarrassment for possessing nothing more than a high school education.

Standing before a minister on a beach in Hawaii, reliving my life in a moment, and feeling positively blessed for the opportunity to be alive and present with the woman beside me.

[Too Tall]

1983 Location NYC near 42nd street me AKA "Rube" intensely watching 3 card Monte played by what later I'd realize were actors...losing $20 and just I am about to beat these dimwits realize...."Oh now I get it" ;)

As m'boy would say "HOW SWEET IT IS" It was than I came to the conclusion I could make more money as a butcher.

[Ginger]

Math: The first time I solved a differential equation correctly without any assistance from books, peers, or instructors. Math is beautiful and oh-so-right. That was a small thing that gave me confidence my upbringing never did.
Years later trying to do simple addition after a closed head injury and realizing that something was wrong, but I had no faculties to figure out what it was, or to care. I had dropped 20-50 points off my IQ in places in an instant... Sometimes there is no victim, things just happen/Do your best with whatever is left, but do try/Accept and push the boundaries of your limitations/ You’re not given anything you can’t handle/Three years recovery is a long price to pay for doing something you enjoy, choose carefully

Two farm stories.
a. One of my ewes who had lost her first lamb, but had a beautiful tiny perfect white lamb on her second try. All was right in the ewe and lamb world so I climbed out of the pen and walked away. As I moved away from the barn I heard the sound of a sheep ramming a fence. I ran back and she was still at it when I jumped in with her. The damage was done. Just because something can be a mother, doesn’t mean it should be/Cull heavily/Nature isn’t kind

b. One cold spring day I helped a heifer deliver her first calf out in the woods. She had been working hard before I got there and had given up. All that was visible was the calf’s nose and tongue turned blue. When I finally got it out it was a beautiful calf, but to all appearances: dead. I was covered in mud and blood and goo and the cow was so exhausted that she couldn’t get up. I went through the standard drill cleaning airways and massaging the calf. No dice. Calf was still dead. No heart beat, no air. Finally threw the calf across a root like I’d seen an old vet do years before (110 lbs...ulf). Two hours later we’re out walking near the woods and we hear a loud calf mooooooo. When I arrived at the scene, the cow was up and protective and the calf was tottering about doing calf things. Like everything we’d gone through never happened. Ungrateful cow charged me.
Small miracles happen/some times it’s best to continue even if a situation seems pointless/ask questions, you can learn useful things/I never want to be a vet or a midwife (previous goals)

Sitting in a bar in Houghton during my second term at Michigan Tech counting money for the tab after I drank all of my heavy-drinking friends under the table and could still walk straight, talk straight, and wasn’t even feeling buzzed after what amounted to 12 shots over 5 hours and realizing that in my family, extremely high tolerance to the affects of alcohol could be developed and addictive behaviors are hereditary and I really didn’t want to follow my maternal grandfather's, my dad’s, nor my brother’s path down that road. It’s too expensive in so many ways.

I forgot one...
Standing on steps in the church after realizing my fiance has visibly gone back on his word to me to please a girl and hearing a clear voice in my head "Stop, this is the biggest mistake of your life." and dismissing it as "nerves."
Three years later:
Phone rings. Me: Hello? Girl's voice: "Hi, is Mark there?" Me: He's not available at the moment, would you like to leave a message? Girl's voice: "Yeah, this is Kara, I work at the gas station. I was calling to see if he wanted to go out tonight. Who's this?"
Me: His wife.

Kara: "OH, I'm SORRY I din't know he was married, he never mentioned it."
Evidently they had gone out several times already. Yeah...Some of the nights away on work, some of the too late-late work days, extreme familiarity with secretaries and female coworkers, dinners after work that I wasn't told about until after he came home, calls over the years from Sandy, Laura, Denise, etc.
Yeah. Now I get it.

[Lincoln]

Um, Ginger, that was 5. :)

[shinomaster]

Um, Ginger, that was 5. :)

No, Ginger is smart, she wouldn't make a mistake.

[Ray]

May as well throw my hats into the ring:

1. By myself, laying on the beach at Big Sur with a head full of peyote back in March of '77 and finally realizing that I knew the "meaning of life" well enough and it was time to get on with it and stop investigating my navel so intently. Then realizing that the tide had come in and I had to climb the 40 foot rock walls out of this frickin' cove or else die and then REALLY understanding the meaning of life. No rules, no safety, no ideas, no preconceptions - it all comes down to me, right here, right now. Not sure if this counts as one moment or two but the whole thing was profound and I'll never forget it.

2. First Grateful Dead show, later that year, and the full realization of just how powerful music could be when musicians and audience really connected.

3. Sitting in the outfield bleachers at a baseball game on my first 'date' with my wife and knowing immediately that it had never been this easy or nice just to be with someone else. It's far better than that now, almost 25 years later - I'm blessed.

4. Birth of my first daughter, carrying her out of the delivery room and having this infant little dynamo looking up at me with her mother's EXACT eyes and already with the full force of the whole personality that I just sent off to college last month and realizing, WOW - this heredity ***** is REAL!

5. Sitting with both of my parents as they peacefully slid out of this world and, though very very sad, realizing that death is just death and it's nothing to fear. Gonna happen regardless and there's no point in screwing up being alive just by worrying about when you won't be.

EDIT - One more: On a crowded bus in Jerusalem in 1981, standing behind a couple of old women who were happily talking and laughing. The bus lurched to a halt and they reached up to grab the handrail, exposing the numbers tatooed on their arms. Instant reminder of how insanely good and easy I'd had it my whole life and how remarkably people can come back from unspeakable horrors to find something to live for.

Obligatory bike moments - first time going uphill really felt easy and smooth, first time I felt totally in the flow on a mountain bike ride, my second or third fixed gear ride, when I realized how totally unlike anything else on a bike THAT was.

-Ray

[keno]

My first Path train ride from the Grove Street Station in Jersey City to the World Trade Center station in lower Manhattan after 9/11 through a shocking gaping, lifeless, stories-deep hole where the World Trade Center formerly stood. I then realized just how evil, vicious, and souless the animals who perpetrated the attacks and those who support them are, and that they really want to kill both you and me and everything we believe in.

keno

[DreaminJohn]

Great thread.

1. The first time being told , as a 19 year old college student, "remember John, it's righty - tighty and lefty - loosey". Honest.

2. Driving home after 9/11 and watching the Towers fall from across the river and promising myself that my soon-to-be-born child would never learn that kind of hatred from me.

3. The recent realization that despite of the fact that I log the majority of my mileage on a MUT riding a hybrid, it's not what I ride but the things that I feel while riding are what make me a cyclist.

[Ginger]

Um, Ginger, that was 5. :)
I had 7 to start...I've had a lot of "now I get it" moments...

[fstrthnu]

Fstrthnu

[AgilisMerlin]

2 fond memories.


First: Binda Straps/Detto Pietro Shoes...............my feet were happily NUMB for years. I remember riding for years with pumping, burning legs with dead, needle and pin feet.



Second: My first junior race, in an industrial park, in New England, i lasted half the race. My legs cramped like twisted wood, and i remember the sensation of blood in my mouth, as my chest heaved and hoed.

I couldn't give those memories to anyone.

oops forgot

third: gluing my first tubular to a GP4. What a frickin' mess. :crap:

fourth: working on my super record/nuovo, thinking 6 spd freewheels were the ultimate.

fifth: telling my boss in 1998 that Armstrong was going to win the tour, and he told me "your full of shyt" , i quit and got a computer job :banana: - third and last shop i ever worked in. Now that was a good memory

[gt6267a]

The ecstasy of kissing, or more than kissing, my high school girlfriend. Feeling the mental and physical pain of breaking up with her. Figuring out that I am able to learn about my emotions from my body … Wow.

In high school, I played water polo. One guy at the east coast championships was beyond fast. When wrestling for the ball, I could out muscle him every time. Swimming down the pool on a fast break, I could body surf his wake, but catching him was laughable. It was one of those, wow, that is just another level moments. I forget the name now, but three years later, that guy swam in the Olympics on the 4 x 100 relay.

The photography editor for the college newspaper / yearbook assigns me to get some early season photos of the basketball team. I am NOT a basketball fan. I get down to the arena and watch the guys warm up for a game against UNC. One player is clearly better than everyone else. The difference is so great, my untrained eye sees it. I mostly shoot that guy. When the contact sheets come back, the editor says, “Hey good work, we needed some shots of AI, Allen Iverson.” He was a freshman and made everyone else on the court look like school girls. There is no replacing talent.

9/11 – my sister, who worked at the world trade center, calls and wakes me up. She says, “I slept in this morning and am ok” I say, “why are you calling me to say that?” she says, “Go turn the TV on and call me back” I turn on the TV and see the first tower on fire, see the second plane hit and see them fall down. I try and call my sister back to thank her for calling and thank her for sleeping in. As anyone who tried to call NYC at that time knows, “All circuits are busy.” My sister and I don’t talk much. If she picks up the phone to call someone, I am not in the top 100, but she called me first. Some things trump others.

A few summers ago, I rode 4-5 times per week with two guys who were much better than me. We rode 3-4 hrs per day and I was reasonably fit. I went riding with a friend who is big into motorcycles but not fit. We went up a 2 mile climb. I rode to the top, dropped down to the bottom and finished the ride up with him at his pace, 3mph. We rode down the same hill on the way back, he beat me to the bottom by at least a minute. Fitness is one thing, Bike handling skills are another.

[Archibald]

In high school, I played water polo. One guy at the east coast championships was beyond fast. When wrestling for the ball, I could out muscle him every time. Swimming down the pool on a fast break, I could body surf his wake, but catching him was laughable. It was one of those, wow, that is just another level moments. I forget the name now, but three years later, that guy swam in the Olympics on the 4 x 100 relay.

Exactly.

At one point I used to think I was fast. About 10 years ago, I was climbing a steep grade with a riding partner who was a 2 the year before and just got picked up for a national level team. While he could drop me like a bad habit on the climb, it was early season for me, and I felt his speed was "achievable" with a lot of hard work. While we were climbing he was riding beside me kind of holding a one person conversation, when suddenly Mike Carter rolls up on us and starts chatting us up. The pace picks up a little. I speak in grunts and groans. Mike says something to the effect of, "you guys want to get back to training? Let's pick up the pace!" I said to my buddy to go ahead, I'm fine, and he just looked at me with a "NFW!" look and told Mike he'd stick with me. Mike said he'd see us at the top and with seemingly no effort took off. I was going as hard as I could and coming out of each switchback I was riding way over my limit and Carter just flew away from us. I could watch him disappear around the corner only to see him minutes away from us already at the next outside switchback.

It just didn't quite seem real or possible and I knew, I phocking knew that I'd never be able to ride like that no matter how hard I trained. It would of been demoralizing if it hadn't been so beautiful to watch.

[Ginger]

Ah, a sports one...speedskating. I was fairly into casual speed skating (no competition, just go fast turn left at the 1/2 mile concourse at the silverdome and outdoors) and at times I could keep up with the local speedsters if they weren't pushing it too hard. I started dating a guy named Tom...turns out he's some Master's National age group champ...we were skating along and he said he was going to do some fast laps...I had not before, nor since ever seen a human being fly. Amazing skill, amazing speed, amazing grace at speed.

And I realized just how casual I was. I don't have those genes.

[stuttgart6]

Dear Liebschen Keno,

I am hopink zat your kitneys and udder toobing is workig vell anymore. Dadoo sents hiss regards to yours.

I neet to comment to your excoriating remarks about "the animals". Zey are humans being like you and me.

Zey haff zer "root" cawses for doink vatt zey do. How wood you be feelink if many uff your family were camels? I feel for zem. You shud heff some more understandink of dem. Zey are cretins of Gott, like you and I.

By ze vay, do you heff a used pair of underwear from after an 80 mile race you cut sent to me? I vill be paying for ze shippink cost, ok?

Regards,

Doris




My first Path train ride from the Grove Street Station in Jersey City to the World Trade Center station in lower Manhattan after 9/11 through a shocking gaping, lifeless, stories-deep hole where the World Trade Center formerly stood. I then realized just how evil, vicious, and souless the animals who perpetrated the attacks and those who support them are, and that they really want to kill both you and me and everything we believe in.

keno

[Ken Robb]

half way through Advanced Infantry Training in 1967 when I realized that "THEY" were not running the war entirely to my satisfaction so I quit volunteering and accepted the cushy jobs offered to me after OCS with gratitude and humility. Well ok, at least gratitude.