Anthony Bourdain, so sad....

[Caballero]

Just heard the news. What a great inspiration.
Rip

[joosttx]

Just reading the headlines. This is so sad. Take care of one another. Help each other. There is always light .

[AngryScientist]

very sad. he leaves quite a legacy of great film behind. really cool guy. he'll be missed.

https://cdn.cnn.com/cnnnext/dam/assets/170905122613-anthony-bourdain-parts-unknown-trinidad-exlarge-169.jpg

[enr1co]

Rest in aloha Anthony- thank you for sharing your talent, humor and inspiration.

[R3awak3n]

Yeah it is very sad. I once saw him in the upper east side, someone shouted Antony Bordain and he raised his hand and waved. RIP

[andeww]

Truly unbelievable. He had an understanding and way with words to really captivate culture. Never met the guy but really appreciated him, rip

[MattTuck]

That's a shame.

Whenever I flipped on one of his shows, he always seemed to be having an interesting adventure.

[providence]

Tremendous loss. Such an intriguing person.

One of the few shows on TV that sought to encourage Americans to seek out and enjoy other cultures and people.

[nalax]

Sad to hear. I admired his no BS style. I still see him sliding on the ice...

[OtayBW]

Very sorry to see him gone. I always enjoyed his shows and his perspective which struck me as having a lot in common with the Beats. The food was just a vehicle, I think....
In Gassho...

[redir]

I really had no idea who this guy was but obviously he meant a lot to many people. I'm sure most of our Facebook feeds have lit up with this news. So I read about him in an article that mentioned he was the one who wrote the essay, 'Don't Eat Before Reading This.' I read that essay probably 10 years ago but it rang a bell, Oh he's the guy who wrote that!

Apparently it's what launched his career. What a god damned shame.

If you have not read this it's great.

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/1999/04/19/dont-eat-before-reading-this

[dbnm]

I'm kind of gutted by this one.

[zrossiter]

I'm kind of gutted by this one.

yeah this one hit me a lot more than other celebrity deaths

[FlashUNC]

Worth mentioning as a reminder, regardless of what anyone is going through:

If you would like to speak with someone, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.

[PQJ]

I really had no idea who this guy was but obviously he meant a lot to many people. I'm sure most of our Facebook feeds have lit up with this news. So I read about him in an article that mentioned he was the one who wrote the essay, 'Don't Eat Before Reading This.' I read that essay probably 10 years ago but it rang a bell, Oh he's the guy who wrote that!

Apparently it's what launched his career. What a god damned shame.

If you have not read this it's great.

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/1999/04/19/dont-eat-before-reading-this

That's an excellent read - thanks for sharing. In my bachelor years a friend and I used to dine often at Les Halles. Damn that was one good blood sausage!

[weaponsgrade]

So very sad. I loved his show and actually watched a rerun last night.

[AngryScientist]

I really had no idea who this guy was but obviously he meant a lot to many people. I'm sure most of our Facebook feeds have lit up with this news. So I read about him in an article that mentioned he was the one who wrote the essay, 'Don't Eat Before Reading This.' I read that essay probably 10 years ago but it rang a bell, Oh he's the guy who wrote that!

Apparently it's what launched his career. What a god damned shame.

If you have not read this it's great.

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/1999/04/19/dont-eat-before-reading-this

good read, thanks for that.

[Salty]

This one hurts. If he died in his sleep after a good meal with his friend in France, it wouldn’t be nearly as upsetting.

I feel terrible for his young daughter (and Kate Spade’s).

[bobswire]

Humans are perplexing, the best of us seem to die way too soon.

[huck*this]

Very sad to see him go. If you have not caught his Youtube series give it a watch. Always looked forward to seeing his film work.

RawCraft (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZJps_l4u2aqHdBuzYSLufA)

[azrider]

His book Kitchen Confidential is a fantastic read.

Really a damn shame he's gone.

RIP

[johnmdesigner]

We have had many wonderful food and travel experiences over the years because of him. Places I had never considered visiting and wonderful places to eat.
Sometimes we would plan an entire holiday around his recommendations. They did not disappoint.
Lots of food bloggers now but none I've encountered have his unique perspective.
My wife sees Eric Ripert in Central Park some mornings on her way to work. That was a "bromance " for sure. He must be devistated.

[mudhead]

I'm kind of gutted by this one.

Same here. RIP Anthony...

[fignon's barber]

When I read about this, it hurt. I've been saying for years, if I could sit down and have a beer with anyone, it would be a table of three with Anthony Bourdain and Greg Lemond.

[fa63]

This comes at a weird time for me... I have been having some issues at home and work, and it has been taking a toll on my mental health. This got me thinking; what makes someone go off the deep end and decide to take their own life? Maybe that threshold isn’t as high as I sometimes think it must be. I never thought someone like Bourdain would commit suicide. Which reminds me, I think it is time for me to make that therapist appointment I have been putting off...

RIP Anthony Bourdain

[rallizes]

awful news

i don't know what's going on but it's not good

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/us-suicide-rate-has-increased-almost-30-since-1990s-cdc-finds-2018-06-07

"Suicide death rates have risen significantly in most states since the late 1990s, with 25 states recording increases of more than 30%, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said."

https://www.nytimes.com/2016/04/22/health/us-suicide-rate-surges-to-a-30-year-high.html

"The suicide rate for middle-aged women, ages 45 to 64, jumped by 63 percent over the period of the study, while it rose by 43 percent for men in that age range, the sharpest increase for males of any age. The overall suicide rate rose by 24 percent from 1999 to 2014, according to the National Center for Health Statistics, which released the study on Friday."

[AngryScientist]

awful news

i don't know what's going on but it's not good

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/us-suicide-rate-has-increased-almost-30-since-1990s-cdc-finds-2018-06-07

"Suicide death rates have risen significantly in most states since the late 1990s, with 25 states recording increases of more than 30%, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said."

i wonder if it has anything to do with the widespread use of social media?

before the internet, you could go home after a crappy day and be alone. today with your smart phone - you're "on" all the time, if you let yourself be.

anyway - that's a startling and troubling statistic.

[DCilliams]

i wonder if it has anything to do with the widespread use of social media?

before the internet, you could go home after a crappy day and be alone. today with your smart phone - you're "on" all the time, if you let yourself be.

anyway - that's a startling and troubling statistic.

I certainly think both the disconnecting and addled comparison effect of social media are not helpful.

[sailorboy]

Also very much shocked and saddened to hear this today...his typical dark/sardonic humor was frequently on display (like so many of the chefs and cooks I worked with when I was younger) but at the same time he seemed to have it under control with sort of a healthy and calm recognition of that side of himself.

Though we can only know the persona he presented on TV or in books, he always seemed genuine enough to assume he wasn't so close to such a dark place.

In conjunction with this story on CNN today they presented a very shocking graphic map showing that since like 1990 or something, suicide rates in every state but one (Nevada) have gone up. In several states it's up 50% or more!! Seeing it presented in one graphic like that was pretty stark. What is happening with us?

[FlashUNC]

i wonder if it has anything to do with the widespread use of social media?

before the internet, you could go home after a crappy day and be alone. today with your smart phone - you're "on" all the time, if you let yourself be.

anyway - that's a startling and troubling statistic.

Just stating some facts here as to a more pertinent (and unique) cause in the United States:

Over half of US suicides annually (about 22,000 of the 40,000 suicides in this country) are by firearm, primarily handgun, with an over 90% success rate for those who attempt suicide by handgun. By contrast those who attempt suicide with other methods have a 90% failure rate.

What's been relaxed over the last two decades?

I'm not arguing correlation is causation, but it would be a place I'd start further investigation than any social media causes.

[cadence90]

This comes at a weird time for me... I have been having some issues at home and work, and it has been taking a toll on my mental health. This got me thinking; what makes someone go off the deep end and decide to take their own life? Maybe that threshold isn’t as high as I sometimes think it must be. I never thought someone like Bourdain would commit suicide. Which reminds me, I think it is time for me to make that therapist appointment I have been putting off...

RIP Anthony Bourdain

Yes, please make that appointment. Take care of yourself.

The threshold is indeed never as high as we think it must be.
The outreach/communication is never as clear as it needs to be.
The support/help is never as close/available as we hope it to be.

So, yes, please make that appointment; take care of yourself.
.

[marsh]

i wonder if it has anything to do with the widespread use of social media?
before the internet, you could go home after a crappy day and be alone. today with your smart phone - you're "on" all the time, if you let yourself be.
anyway - that's a startling and troubling statistic.

Not sure about Bourdain in particular, I think it is definately contributing on the whole. This piece about youtuber burnout is troubling:
https://www.polygon.com/2018/6/1/17413542/burnout-mental-health-awareness-youtube-elle-mills-el-rubius-bobby-burns-pewdiepie

[Jaybee]

snip...

In conjunction with this story on CNN today they presented a very shocking graphic map showing that since like 1990 or something, suicide rates in every state but one (Nevada) have gone up. In several states it's up 50% or more!! Seeing it presented in one graphic like that was pretty stark. What is happening with us?

There is a theory packaged from some other social researcher by Malcolm Gladwell (yeah, I know, sorry) that has to do with riots. He relates it to school shootings, but I think we could also draw a correlation to increasing rates of any social ill (and maybe the visibility of social media)

The first person to act in a riot is a degenerate. He wants to start something and is just looking for a cheap excuse to throw a rock threw a window. The next person would never be the first person to throw a rock, but if he sees someone else, then maybe he would participate. The third person would never do this, but if she sees two other doing it, and so on, until some guy who wouldn't hurt a fly is ok with looting a TV because he's just seen 99 other people do it.

Maybe the barriers to/social stigma of suicide have just dropped over the years. Because of increased social media exposure of suicides, especially famous person suicides, it starts to become normalized. People who normally wouldn't go down that hole see 50 people before them go and it becomes "more OK."

Just throwing ideas out. Feel free to trash them.

[djg]

RIP, Anthony. I enjoyed his show and was fortunate to follow-up on a few of his finds while traveling.

[Joel]

This is so sad on so many levels. Literally screamed when saw this. Being in the restaurant business for so many years this is like having - well - I'm not even sure I have the words.

Had the opportunity to actually dine at many of the places he took all of us to on the shows.

Never thought...

[Bostic]

I read the first few paragraphs of that link in his writing. It reads just like how he would talk on Parts Unknown. Gonna miss that show, I enjoyed it a lot.

The Youtube burnout, I can totally see that. Always having to create content, keeping videos at least 10 minutes for the ad revenue. Before Youtube I used to create and host drum videos on my own domain. Even back then it was sooo much time and effort. Checking sync issues, sound, video quality, etc. I got fed up and said to myself "is this worth the amount of time I'm spending??" and ultimately it wasn't. I still have a channel on YT but free time isn't there and I'd rather be riding my bike.

[buddybikes]

His use of language to describe food, and more importantly culture, was exquisite.

[ntb1001]

Wow...


My favourite tv show...really enjoy his personality. This is a real sad story. I always new he had a troubled past, but never thought this would happen.




Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[benb]

I really enjoyed Kitchen Confidential. I really haven't had cable TV since he came to have TV shows so I've seen minimal amounts of his TV shows.

He had some major demons.. recovering alcoholic & heroin addict if I remember correctly from the book.

Fame doesn't seem to help many people and he had a tough time even before he became famous.

I mostly laugh at the fashion/handbag stuff but Kate Spade's story was also pretty interesting and sad. She had lost the right to use her own name in business through some poor business decisions, same way John Fogerty lost the rights to play his own songs.

[OtayBW]

All the published data we see today seems to be that map data by state through 2016. I'd say that the 2008 recession with the spate of foreclosures and high unemployment probably saw a spike in suicide rates corresponding to ~that period. I am not optimistice about what the data for the most recent 2 year period might show......

[redir]

There is a theory packaged from some other social researcher by Malcolm Gladwell (yeah, I know, sorry) that has to do with riots. He relates it to school shootings, but I think we could also draw a correlation to increasing rates of any social ill (and maybe the visibility of social media)

The first person to act in a riot is a degenerate. He wants to start something and is just looking for a cheap excuse to throw a rock threw a window. The next person would never be the first person to throw a rock, but if he sees someone else, then maybe he would participate. The third person would never do this, but if she sees two other doing it, and so on, until some guy who wouldn't hurt a fly is ok with looting a TV because he's just seen 99 other people do it.

Maybe the barriers to/social stigma of suicide have just dropped over the years. Because of increased social media exposure of suicides, especially famous person suicides, it starts to become normalized. People who normally wouldn't go down that hole see 50 people before them go and it becomes "more OK."

Just throwing ideas out. Feel free to trash them.

I remember reading about that and found it absolutely fascinating. Hopefully more work is being done on this hypothesis.

[Mark McM]

awful news

i don't know what's going on but it's not good

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/us-suicide-rate-has-increased-almost-30-since-1990s-cdc-finds-2018-06-07

"Suicide death rates have risen significantly in most states since the late 1990s, with 25 states recording increases of more than 30%, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said."

https://www.nytimes.com/2016/04/22/health/us-suicide-rate-surges-to-a-30-year-high.html

"The suicide rate for middle-aged women, ages 45 to 64, jumped by 63 percent over the period of the study, while it rose by 43 percent for men in that age range, the sharpest increase for males of any age. The overall suicide rate rose by 24 percent from 1999 to 2014, according to the National Center for Health Statistics, which released the study on Friday."

If you look at the statistics, the rise in the suicide rate is mostly a white, middle-aged (and usually middle class) issue. The suicide rate among the minorities and the poor are actually much lower. Noting the above, although there has been a rise in the rate of middle aged women committing suicides, the majority of suicides are actually men.

The rise in suicides appears to track the rise in the feelings of discontent and desperation among the white, middle aged middle class in America.

[mkbk]

RIP, a great entertainer, I'm sorry for those directly affected. Was the quote below intended to be rude, insensitive, self serving and politicizing?Just stating some facts here as to a more pertinent (and unique) cause in the United States:

Over half of US suicides annually (about 22,000 of the 40,000 suicides in this country) are by firearm, primarily handgun, with an over 90% success rate for those who attempt suicide by handgun. By contrast those who attempt suicide with other methods have a 90% failure rate.

What's been relaxed over the last two decades?

I'm not arguing correlation is causation, but it would be a place I'd start further investigation than any social media causes.

[tuxbailey]

RIP. Very sad.

Not a good way to wake up, check phone and there is an update from NPR that he passed away.

[FlashUNC]

RIP, a great entertainer, I'm sorry for those directly affected. Was the quote below intended to be rude, insensitive, self serving and politicizing?

No more rude or insensitive than someone suggesting that the rise of social media is leading to a rise in suicide. At least I had a smidge of evidence to present in making any kind of addition to the conversation.

I made my thoughts clear about Mr Bourdain earlier in the thread and this loss.

But hey, virtue signal away.

[Clean39T]

This one hurts. Anthony was a big fan of Mark Lanegan (he sang the intro song to Parts Unknown). It's something we shared. Mark's early solo albums - The Winding Sheet and Whiskey for the Holy Ghost - loomed large in my life at some pretty pivotal times...stories I can't share openly on the interwebs...and would have a hard time putting into words anyway. I saw Mark perform in San Diego at the Casbah in 2003 and had a few drinks with him. An amazing character, though I was in a very different place then than I am now. Anyway I came here to share the song and lyrics of "Some Strange Religion" off the Bubblegum album, which seemed like the right one for today and what a lot of us are feeling.

But when I went to find the clip on YouTube, instead I found this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RyUVNFBZ_X4

I didn't know Anthony did that show and hadn't seen the clip before (gave up cable at least a few years ago). F.king flooring. It captures everything. And the fact that he's sitting on a balcony in a hotel room I think I actually stayed in around three years ago. D.mmit.

I'm sorry that the world failed him; that life became too much and the darkness that dogged him for decades couldn't be released. And that in the end he felt there were no options left that would allow him to live through the pain.

RIP.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mr-Q_QQE5dM&index=11&list=PL3E940223624C1007

Pendulum, by Mark Lanegan

Jesus Christ been here and gone
What a painful price to pay
He's left his life in a thunderstorm
Tears cold dark eyes upon
Swing pendulum, swing low
Got no place to call my own
Oh my Lord don't you bother me
I'm as tired as a man can be
I'm as tired as a man can be

Jesus Christ been here and gone
What a painful place to leave
With frost on the limbs of a cherry tree
This cold, cold wind is buryin' me
Swing pendulum, swing slow
Got no time to call my own
Oh my Lord don't you bother me
I'm as tired as a man can be
I'm as tired as a man can be

[Fishbike]

Yeah this one hurts.

I guess in large part because in his imperfect package, he did what and said what we all want do: travel to interesting places; connect with people; ask the tough questions; find what people have in common, instead of dwelling on our differences; say what we think; turn a phrase that is both pithy and piercing; strip away pretense; eat good food.

Be nice to people. Take care of each other. Ride your bike(s).

[Burnette]

There's very few shows that I can tolerate to watch in series back to back or even more than once but Anthony had that thing that made you look and listen.

He was the common man, self deprecating but most importantly he could write and story and tell it even better.

You knew exactly where he stood, he was quick to show the folly of man made systems that bring division and he showed the hypocrisy and blindness of elitism, ignorance and intolerance. He did this by sitting down with another person in their environment, eating their food and talking to them. And through that understanding of another, baseless notions disappeared and the mind expanded to allow the possibility that the unknown may not be a scary thing.

My heart hurts for the family and friends because their suffering did not end today, it is cut fresh and will never heal completely.

I won't try to assign a cause or reason, we may never know. There could be over a million people in America walking around with suicidal thoughts in their heads right now. What tips the hand to action can be so varied and personal that a simplified cause and remedy may not be possible at this point.

I will say that we should all actively try and remove the stigma of mental illness. It's OK if you break down, it's OK if you're not strong enough to take it, it's OK if you have to take time off, it's OK to need help and to get it

And if we suspect something we should say something. If someone we know is doing something that can physically do them harm, we say something, "you're riding too much without recovery, be careful, get rest and sleep". The mental well being of a person should be just as approachable. Someone going through stress at work, has money issues, going through divorce, a "be careful, get rest and sleep and call someone if you need to talk", should be part of our dialogue.

Because though we may never know what really made someone do it, all we are left with is "I wish I would have said something".

[shinomaster]

yeah this one hit me a lot more than other celebrity deaths

Maybe it’s because he seemed like a real travel buddy? This really effin blows.

[livingminimal]

I cant think of a single person that I do not know personally whose death would affect me as much as this one.

Guy taught me so much. Not just about food and culture, but about a lot of other things. Being a square peg in a round hole, coming together with yourself and figuring out where you fit later in the life, and yes dealing with depression and thinking about how I deal with mine.

I'll miss the guy massively, and I never met or knew him personally.

This one sucks.

If you're thinking about this world without you in it, if you think someone around you is contemplating suicide, please please talk to someone. People love you. People want you around.

**** today.

[Clean39T]

There could be over a million people in America walking around with suicidal thoughts in their heads right now.

One of the promising things I see trending in the world today is the exposure to mindfulness meditation, which is helping many see that they are not responsible for their thoughts and can't control their thoughts...and therefore do not have to act on them. We are not what is seen, we are what sees. The space that exists between the seer and the seen is what allows higher-order choice to interrupt the thought>action chain.

In the case of someone who is experiencing suicidal (or homicidal) thoughts, this couldn't be more important. We live in a society that exposes our consciousness to all types of harmful beta - the movies, music, television, and recurring violence everywhere. This sinks in and returns to us through thoughts and dreams. And without the space to witness them as weather-systems passing through our sky that are the result of causes and conditions that have occurred outside of our awareness, we allow ourselves to act on them as if controlled by an unseen, unknown puppeteer. Given the level of dis-ease in our society, it's frankly surprising the statistics aren't higher.

If there is one thing you can do to help someone who is suffering, but is not in immediate crisis (see resources others have posted for that), it's this: get them to a professional who can help them break the cycle of identification with recursive thinking.

Of course, the role of chemical balancing in the brain can't be denied; working with that can certainly reduce the frequency and duration of thunderstorms passing through each person's consciousness. However, no amount of chemical balancing (so long as it allows someone to retain consciousness) is going to completely remove harmful thought patterns, and that is why the advice above is so critical.

I fear for Anthony the balance simply couldn't be kept. A liftetime of drugs and drinking certainly doesn't make any of this easier. I know my terroir has been forever altered by things I did many years ago - long before I knew anything about that thought>action nexus. And that's something I now have to deal with - it just is what it is. Riding, friends, and clean living help inordinately - but again, no one has the power to control their thoughts or all the variables...

[Matthew]

Ok, I'll be the turd in the punch bowl. I didn't watch his show. Clearly many here thought he was entertaining, etc. I know he had some demons. I know life can be overwhelming. But I just can't see how you can leave an 11 year old behind. If your thoughts and depression are too much, I just can't see how leaving behind a child that is only 11 can possibly be better. I am not trying to be insensitive, I guess I just don't understand. I feel the same about Kate Spade. Thirteen year old daughter. What about the damage you cause them by doing this? Sorry, I waited hours before I posted this but it kept popping in my head. Not looking for an argument but thought it should be part of the discussion.

[wc1934]

Ok, I'll be the turd in the punch bowl. I didn't watch his show. Clearly many here thought he was entertaining, etc. I know he had some demons. I know life can be overwhelming. But I just can't see how you can leave an 11 year old behind. If your thoughts and depression are too much, I just can't see how leaving behind a child that is only 11 can possibly be better. I am not trying to be insensitive, I guess I just don't understand. I feel the same about Kate Spade. Thirteen year old daughter. What about the damage you cause them by doing this? Sorry, I waited hours before I posted this but it kept popping in my head. Not looking for an argument but thought it should be part of the discussion.

You are right - some have said that suicide is a selfish act as it hurts and impacts those love ones who are left. However, I still cant imagine the pain, hurt and anguish that one must be going thru to actually take their own life.

[gemship]

I watched this show when the cable company could afford to let me watch it for the limited service I pay them. I'm thankful those cheap crooks let me watch Anthony Bourdain Parts Unknown. The show made me laugh and I looked up to this guy in envy. I really connected to Tony because he is the spitting image, well at least 7 tenths of the way to a guy I know. So in that weird kinda way this hits home for me. Pathetic he did what he did as far as leaving a kid behind like a previous poster said. It's hard to have sympathy when I'm self employed and working my tail off for a fistful of dollars. I mean if I had a kid to support it would really change the game for me but instead I just ignore my passion for bikes to stay in the green. Ironically the last thing I feel like doing is hanging myself just because I pissed away a nice week of weather for riding to stay bent over digging clams. I get it's a disease but...I don't get how someone who has access to easy living and good nutrition lives such an unhealthy lifestyle so as to off themselves.

[Clean39T]

I get it's a disease but...I don't get how someone who has access to easy living and good nutrition lives such an unhealthy lifestyle so as to off themselves.


There is no “but” - it’s a disease, full stop. Like cancer or diabetes, there are things you can do to help prevent or manage it. But there’s nothing you can do to wish it away, no matter how much money you have or much it looks like you have “nothing to complain about”.

Continuing to call people like Anthony pathetic or selfish just perpetuates the problem.

They (and those teetering) don’t need our criticism, they need our help and understanding.

[gemship]

There is no “but” - it’s a disease, full stop. Like cancer or diabetes, there are things you can do to help prevent or manage it. But there’s nothing you can do to wish it away, no matter how much money you have or much it looks like you have “nothing to complain about”.

Continuing to call people like Anthony pathetic or selfish just perpetuates the problem.

They (and those teetering) don’t need our criticism, they need our help and understanding.

Yeah well if you say so but I think as a parent your kids come first. To that end survival instinct kick in. Suicide is an act of selfishness. Tony wasn't stupid...but maybe he just didn't know how to meditate. I will say though that his show was all about in excess with food and booze and that is NOT HEALTHY! maybe funny but not healthy.

[colker]

Ok, I'll be the turd in the punch bowl. I didn't watch his show. Clearly many here thought he was entertaining, etc. I know he had some demons. I know life can be overwhelming. But I just can't see how you can leave an 11 year old behind. If your thoughts and depression are too much, I just can't see how leaving behind a child that is only 11 can possibly be better. I am not trying to be insensitive, I guess I just don't understand. I feel the same about Kate Spade. Thirteen year old daughter. What about the damage you cause them by doing this? Sorry, I waited hours before I posted this but it kept popping in my head. Not looking for an argument but thought it should be part of the discussion.

I agree.

[buddybikes]

>>Yeah well if you say so but I think as a parent your kids come first. To that end survival instinct kick in. Suicide is an act of selfishness. Tony wasn't stupid...but maybe he just didn't know how to meditate. I will say though that his show was all about in excess with food and booze and that is NOT HEALTHY!


I tripped onto his show my mistake, and I thought for sometime it was a show on culture. In fact it was. Yes the booze and excess food existed, but watch how he connected the back alleys of Cambodia to 1st world societies. How many have done this so well?

[Burnette]

And that's the stigma that needs to be removed. Trying to understand suicide from the perspective of a healthy person is the problem and in that frame of mind you will never get how they got there and then why they took the last step.

Depression is all consuming, every facet of your life is touched by it, the pain is deep, it decays the soul, it's blinding, it debilitates your thinking process, it's intense and it's unending.

Some won't understand the condition and how it distorts the thinking and that's fine, people don't have to get it. What I encourage people not to do is to come down hard on people who are sick and still here. It's counter productive. You are in just an unimaginable world of hurt at the point of taking your life. If someone is teetering a lecture isn't the fix, harsh treatment actually more fuel to sickness.

To add that just because some have fame and fortune that they should then by default be without depression is to not understand people. On a show about lottery winners who had disastrous lives after winning, a lawyer noted that money exaggerates your pluses as well as your minuses. You have more money and time to explore both realms and that generates bigger outcomes than if you had less time and less resources. In short, more time and money can make a bad thing worse.

To end your life in such a brutal manner and leave everyone who loves you behind this way tells you how deep and hurtful the pain is and how the mind was altered. Nobody condones it, everybody wants to stop it, you have to start by trying to understand the condition from the perspective of the patient. It's a cancer on the soul that clouds the mind.

[OtayBW]

And that's the stigma that needs to be removed. Trying to understand suicide from the perspective of a healthy person is the problem and in that frame of mind you will never get how they got there and then why they took the last step.

Depression is all consuming, every facet of your life is touched by it, the pain is deep, it decays the soul, it's blinding, it debilitates your thinking process, it's intense and it's unending.

Some won't understand the condition and how it distorts the thinking and that's fine, people don't have to get it. What I encourage people not to do is to come down hard on people who are sick and still here. It's counter productive. You are in just an unimaginable world of hurt at the point of taking your life. If someone is teetering a lecture isn't the fix, harsh treatment actually more fuel to sickness.

To add that just because some have fame and fortune that they should then by default be without depression is to not understand people. On a show about lottery winners who had disastrous lives after winning, a lawyer noted that money exaggerates your pluses as well as your minuses. You have more money and time to explore both realms and that generates bigger outcomes than if you had less time and less resources. In short, more time and money can make a bad thing worse.

To end your life in such a brutal manner and leave everyone who loves you behind this way tells you how deep and hurtful the pain is and how the mind was altered. Nobody condones it, everybody wants to stop it, you have to start by trying to understand the condition from the perspective of the patient. It's a cancer on the soul that clouds the mind.
Well said....

[zank]

And that's the stigma that needs to be removed. Trying to understand suicide from the perspective of a healthy person is the problem and in that frame of mind you will never get how they got there and then why they took the last step.

Depression is all consuming, every facet of your life is touched by it, the pain is deep, it decays the soul, it's blinding, it debilitates your thinking process, it's intense and it's unending.

Some won't understand the condition and how it distorts the thinking and that's fine, people don't have to get it. What I encourage people not to do is to come down hard on people who are sick and still here. It's counter productive. You are in just an unimaginable world of hurt at the point of taking your life. If someone is teetering a lecture isn't the fix, harsh treatment actually more fuel to sickness.

To add that just because some have fame and fortune that they should then by default be without depression is to not understand people. On a show about lottery winners who had disastrous lives after winning, a lawyer noted that money exaggerates your pluses as well as your minuses. You have more money and time to explore both realms and that generates bigger outcomes than if you had less time and less resources. In short, more time and money can make a bad thing worse.

To end your life in such a brutal manner and leave everyone who loves you behind this way tells you how deep and hurtful the pain is and how the mind was altered. Nobody condones it, everybody wants to stop it, you have to start by trying to understand the condition from the perspective of the patient. It's a cancer on the soul that clouds the mind.

Thank you for this post.

[cadence90]

If one has been close to those who have committed suicide, it is clear that the causes are often myriad; that they often brutally metastasize far beyond our own "logic"; and so that to then assign terms such as "selfish", "guilty", "irresponsible" to the outcome is to misunderstand or even deny the issues on a pretty fundamental level.

The "path", compared to say what is sadly happening now to Charles Krauthammer, or recently to Dwight Clark, is simply not that "linear" in any way at all, never has been, never will be. This is certainly one of the many reasons that we distant witnesses have, understandably, great difficulty in truly comprehending these decisions and events.

To suspend empathy in order to cast judgment on any level really makes very sense at all, and only creates even more distance, in my experience.

:(
.

[colker]

If one has been close to those who have committed suicide, it is clear that the causes are often myriad; that they often brutally metastasize far beyond our own "logic"; and so that to then assign terms such as "selfish", "guilty", "irresponsible" to the outcome is to misunderstand or even deny the issues on a pretty fundamental level.

The "path", compared to say what is sadly happening now to Charles Krauthammer, or recently to Dwight Clark, is simply not that "linear" in any way at all, never has been, never will be. This is certainly one of the many reasons that we distant witnesses have, understandably, great difficulty in truly comprehending these decisions and events.

To suspend empathy in order to cast judgment on any level really makes very sense at all, and only creates even more distance, in my experience.

:(
.

Ok. I understand depression is a monster. I understand the siren call to leave the stage... but no matter what no one gets a free pass to do it. No one.
That´s why religion tells a big NO to it. And they know suffering.
It is tough. It is horrible out there but we have to carry on.
One way to help is saying "No.. you can´t do it. You are not allowed to."

[Clean39T]

And that's the stigma that needs to be removed. Trying to understand suicide from the perspective of a healthy person is the problem and in that frame of mind you will never get how they got there and then why they took the last step.



Depression is all consuming, every facet of your life is touched by it, the pain is deep, it decays the soul, it's blinding, it debilitates your thinking process, it's intense and it's unending.



Some won't understand the condition and how it distorts the thinking and that's fine, people don't have to get it. What I encourage people not to do is to come down hard on people who are sick and still here. It's counter productive. You are in just an unimaginable world of hurt at the point of taking your life. If someone is teetering a lecture isn't the fix, harsh treatment actually more fuel to sickness.



To add that just because some have fame and fortune that they should then by default be without depression is to not understand people. On a show about lottery winners who had disastrous lives after winning, a lawyer noted that money exaggerates your pluses as well as your minuses. You have more money and time to explore both realms and that generates bigger outcomes than if you had less time and less resources. In short, more time and money can make a bad thing worse.



To end your life in such a brutal manner and leave everyone who loves you behind this way tells you how deep and hurtful the pain is and how the mind was altered. Nobody condones it, everybody wants to stop it, you have to start by trying to understand the condition from the perspective of the patient. It's a cancer on the soul that clouds the mind.


We may have had a little dust-up over the “point” of light bikes...but this post erases all doubts in my mind about who you are and what you bring to the table...what you said above rings true and needs to be shouted from the rooftops...chapeau my friend :beer: <- (rootbeers)

[cadence90]

Ok. I understand depression is a monster. I understand the siren call to leave the stage... but no matter what no one gets a free pass to do it. No one.
That´s why religion tells a big NO to it. And they know suffering.
It is tough. It is horrible out there but we have to carry on.
One way to help is saying "No.. you can´t do it. You are not allowed to."

Certainly, of course.

But some of that, "No.. you can´t do it. You are not allowed to." sentiment, which is great and with which I completely agree, is unfortunately part of the linear-thinking approach to the disease. There very often are no quite-so-linear, clear, understandable, actionable requests for help. Or, those requests are all that, are indeed verbalized, but are then used, perversely, by the victim in order to further promote their own demise.

It is horrifically sad in all ways.

Also, I am not advocating for "a free pass" for the victims. Not at all.
Rather for deeper understanding, less judgment, more forgiveness, on the part of those who remain behind. Those things, too, are aspects of our connected human responsibility, I think.
.

[Hellgate]

Ok, I'll be the turd in the punch bowl. I didn't watch his show. Clearly many here thought he was entertaining, etc. I know he had some demons. I know life can be overwhelming. But I just can't see how you can leave an 11 year old behind. If your thoughts and depression are too much, I just can't see how leaving behind a child that is only 11 can possibly be better. I am not trying to be insensitive, I guess I just don't understand. I feel the same about Kate Spade. Thirteen year old daughter. What about the damage you cause them by doing this? Sorry, I waited hours before I posted this but it kept popping in my head. Not looking for an argument but thought it should be part of the discussion.Depression is brutal. Unless you've experienced it, it is all but impossible to understand. When it hits it completely envelops you. The worst is when people tell you to be grateful for what you have. The darkness and the physical pain is unrelenting.

When this happens I understand. It is sad, it is brutal, but I understand. My bike and my rides help keep me here.

Sent from my ONEPLUS A5010 using Tapatalk

[longlist]

i saw a video interview of him last year where he said he was in pain after a simple surgery. he said he had it after his daughter was born. he didnt say what it was but he had been in pain for at least 10 years. he stared doing yoga, physical therapy and a lot more exercising to get healthier in hopes of helping the pain problem. he even changed his diet. very sad to hear about this. clearly whatever pain it was he couldn't take anymore.

[Salty]

There's very few shows that I can tolerate to watch in series back to back or even more than once but Anthony had that thing that made you look and listen.

He was the common man, self deprecating but most importantly he could write and story and tell it even better.

You knew exactly where he stood, he was quick to show the folly of man made systems that bring division and he showed the hypocrisy and blindness of elitism, ignorance and intolerance. He did this by sitting down with another person in their environment, eating their food and talking to them. And through that understanding of another, baseless notions disappeared and the mind expanded to allow the possibility that the unknown may not be a scary thing.

My heart hurts for the family and friends because their suffering did not end today, it is cut fresh and will never heal completely.

I won't try to assign a cause or reason, we may never know. There could be over a million people in America walking around with suicidal thoughts in their heads right now. What tips the hand to action can be so varied and personal that a simplified cause and remedy may not be possible at this point.

I will say that we should all actively try and remove the stigma of mental illness. It's OK if you break down, it's OK if you're not strong enough to take it, it's OK if you have to take time off, it's OK to need help and to get it

And if we suspect something we should say something. If someone we know is doing something that can physically do them harm, we say something, "you're riding too much without recovery, be careful, get rest and sleep". The mental well being of a person should be just as approachable. Someone going through stress at work, has money issues, going through divorce, a "be careful, get rest and sleep and call someone if you need to talk", should be part of our dialogue.

Because though we may never know what really made someone do it, all we are left with is "I wish I would have said something".

Thank you.

[sitzmark]

Ok. I understand depression is a monster. I understand the siren call to leave the stage... but no matter what no one gets a free pass to do it. No one.
That´s why religion tells a big NO to it. And they know suffering.
It is tough. It is horrible out there but we have to carry on.
One way to help is saying "No.. you can´t do it. You are not allowed to."

Not necessarily true. Those living at the extreme are revered and their pursuits lauded, but the fact that they aren't viewed as people the act of committing suicide is one of semantics and "luck" in many cases. Does pushing the limits to the brink of life or death qualify as a disease or is it living life on one's own terms?

Having lost a father and step-mother to suicide, I have some exposure and experience with the subject. I both understand and don't understand any of it - most likely never will. I'm sure the value judgements and justifications for taking one's life are as varied and complex as every individual involved. The fact that my parents had adult children is a different situation than the responsibility of dependent children, but no less traumatic emotionally for the survivors.

There's an arrogance to saying as "healthy people" we see the perils of someone's life situation as a sickness and expect them to soldier through whatever pain and anguish involved because it is what we want for them. That too is based in some level of selfishness. Obviously some situations can be changed physically with assistance and support from others (family, friends, professionals), but not always emotionally/mentally. There's chemical and past horrific practices to "make right" the brain of the "mentally ill" (those who think outside of acceptable norms) so they are not the person that nature has sculpted. At that point maybe the person is or isn't enjoying their life ... but we feel good.

The Kevorkian debate addressed some of these issues - when is a person allowed to legally decide their life on their terms vs taking matters into their own hands? Society saying never will never stop suicides. Some individuals have presence of mind and the mental strength to move forward with the act. It has to be a brutal decision because the risks involved with "getting it wrong" are a life that is even more devastatingly unpleasant. Maybe a person has the presence of mind to realize that at the time and maybe they don't - again I'm sure it is wildly dependent on the situation.

I have no answers. If I did my family might not have experienced what we did. That said, how much different is it (in mindset) that one says I've lived the life that I want to live and I've had enough vs. a person engaging in an extreme sport/activity where the odds are significantly high that this will be the person's last act of life? One case is deliberate and unacceptable while the other is calculated and often encouraged. As beeatnik might say - life is so weird.

The manner in which Anthony Bourdain shared his life was refreshing and entertaining, especially observing the connections he made with other human beings. In the end that is all we get - the opportunity to experience the physical world in which we live and the joy of sharing it with others. RIP Anthony Bourdain.

[crashnburn]

Sad to see him gone...

I have loved his shows since No Reservations.
He gives insight to the road less traveled and not just the food.

His shows is one of the very few TV shows I watch.

RIP Anthony...

[CDM]

We may have had a little dust-up over the “point” of light bikes...but this post erases all doubts in my mind about who you are and what you bring to the table...what you said above rings true and needs to be shouted from the rooftops...chapeau my friend :beer: <- (rootbeers)

Here here!

[colker]

Is it a mental illness trouble or is it something we are all experiencing?
Aren´t we all getting lost and afraid of having a meaningless life? Each day we watch the news proving ourselves helpless in the face of obscurantism, ignorance and injustice. Worse: past and future have no value. It´s all about the present. About being young and wealthy forever. Otherwise it´s the promise of loneliness.

[soulspinner]

Depression unfortunately kills. My younger brother took his life in 1989. Told only his wife he was depressed and she kept the secret...he was brilliant, incredibly funny, and my best riding buddy. Depression skews your ability to think clearly. Ive been there. You have nothing left and need the escape, exhausted from the depressive state there is nothing but the seeking the end of this fatigue......seek help when you feel this the first time...……….here is to you Mr. Bourdain...…….

[BryanE]

Ok. I understand depression is a monster. I understand the siren call to leave the stage... but no matter what no one gets a free pass to do it. No one.
That´s why religion tells a big NO to it. And they know suffering.
It is tough. It is horrible out there but we have to carry on.
One way to help is saying "No.. you can´t do it. You are not allowed to."

Stupidest post I've ever read here.
You are a moron.
I don't think you understand ****.
BE

[Cicli]

Stupidest post I've ever read here.
You are a moron.
I don't think you understand ****.
BE

Really?
Name calling?
Be an adult.

[BryanE]

I am being an adult.
Much more than the insulting, ignorant comment about just say no.
Do you agree with that simpletons point of view?
Just say no to backward thinking.
And do it as bluntly as possible.
BE

[Cicli]

I am being an adult.
Much more than the insulting, ignorant comment about just say no.
Do you agree with that simpletons point of view?
Just say no to backward thinking.
And do it as bluntly as possible.
BE

I will not entertain you. Have a nice evening.

[colker]

Stupidest post I've ever read here.
You are a moron.
I don't think you understand ****.
BE

I love you too man.

[colker]

I am being an adult.
Much more than the insulting, ignorant comment about just say no.
Do you agree with that simpletons point of view?
Just say no to backward thinking.
And do it as bluntly as possible.
BE

oh yeah.. definitely an adult.
I just hope the mods do something about your adult thinking.
Otherwise i will feel entitled to tell you how i see your IQ. Can i use private mail? Mods?

[redir]

I am being an adult.
Much more than the insulting, ignorant comment about just say no.
Do you agree with that simpletons point of view?
Just say no to backward thinking.
And do it as bluntly as possible.
BE

Nancy Reagan's 'just say no' campaign was a complete flop. But that doesn't mean it's ok for you to be a douche bag. Lighten up Francis.

[dbnm]

yeah, this Memorial thread is really working.

I'm guessing this will be locked up any minute now.

[m4rk540]

In some societies suicide is not cool and it's less common. It's ok to not be ok with it. Pathology aside.

[gasman]

Bryan e you have earned yourself a timeout for a signature rule violation. There is no need for name calling.

I know many who struggle with depression and have 2 friends who have committed suicide. You may have been touched directly but your aggressive posts are not welcome.

[gemship]

>>Yeah well if you say so but I think as a parent your kids come first. To that end survival instinct kick in. Suicide is an act of selfishness. Tony wasn't stupid...but maybe he just didn't know how to meditate. I will say though that his show was all about in excess with food and booze and that is NOT HEALTHY!


I tripped onto his show my mistake, and I thought for sometime it was a show on culture. In fact it was. Yes the booze and excess food existed, but watch how he connected the back alleys of Cambodia to 1st world societies. How many have done this so well?

I won't disagree. I was actually afraid to get back on this forum after I made that post. I really didn't want to perpetuate a back and forth debate on this topic but I knew if I got back on here I would have to answer to what I posted. To that end I'm surprised this thread hasn't been locked. You're right his show was great in that it brought me the viewer to places I will never go to in my lifetime. It was kinda polarizing as I agree it really did give me insight to another way of life but it always had that partying thing going on. Like I don't think I could even move the next day doing some of those things in excess but he did. Yet I loved it. Well I get that suicide is a elusive issue, disease, whatever you wanna call it. I kinda see it as a first world problem created out of convenience. A short term answer to cope with stress that if one had the next minute or breath to take or just someone to walk in on them then they would probably take it all back. Those dark thoughts that lead to a one time fate. Personally I feel somethings are hopeless like keeping my mountain bike nick free or everything perfect in general or work. To that end I feel kinda like a caveman running for my life with a bunch of saber tooth tigers on my tail, but I refuse to drop their bone. Just to busy living I guess.