bar mitzvah ?

[H.Frank Beshear]

Looking for some help from some of my hebrew brothers :D One of Shannons friends from dance class has invited her to her bar mitzvah. Which is very cool. What is an appropriate gift for the celebration? They have danced together for the last 4-5 years, go to each others birthday parties and such. This is a big day for the young lady and I have no idea what the correct gift is. Thanks Frank

[Jason E]

Bat Mitzvah.

Boys go to the Bar whilst the Girls go Batty.

Appropriate gifts range in Denomination intervals of 18, a nice little gift, or perhaps a donation in her name to a nice cause. Buying Trees, etc...

[JMerring]

to give you a little context on why $$ gifts are done in denominations of 18 (eg, $18, $36, $72, etc.), the hebrew word of '18' is 'chai,' which means 'life.' so there you go - the symbolism of gift giving in denominations of 18.

[davids]

Bat Mitzvah.

Boys go to the Bar whilst the Girls go Batty.

Appropriate gifts range in Denomination intervals of 18, a nice little gift, or perhaps a donation in her name to a nice cause. Buying Trees, etc...
Wow. That's pretty much exactly what I was going to write (but without the Bar/Bat joke...)

Gift cards to clothing/jewlery stores in $18 multiples were a big hit with my daughter. She also got some really nice (mostly inexpensive) jewelry, and lots of $$$. A gift in the Bat Mitzvah girl's honor to her favorite charity is also a nice idea - My daughter still displays a card from Heiffer International (http://www.heifer.org/) that notes a donation in her honor.

As far as "buying trees" - Reforesting Israel has long been a popular American Jewish charity. You can buy anything from a tree to a forest (I've seen it done!)

And the "bar" vs. "bat" thing - "Bar Mitzvah" means "son of the commandment", "Bat Mitzvah means "daughter of the commandment"...

I hope that you were invited to attend as well - It's a great thing to experience.

[Too Tall]

I'm with Jason on this +1. Plant a tree or make a named donation to something that will remind her of this ocassion.

[ThasFACE]

Looking for some help from some of my hebrew brothers :D One of Shannons friends from dance class has invited her to her bar mitzvah. Which is very cool. What is an appropriate gift for the celebration? They have danced together for the last 4-5 years, go to each others birthday parties and such. This is a big day for the young lady and I have no idea what the correct gift is. Thanks Frank

Not sure how much you want to spend, but jewely of some kind seems to be popular at Bat Mitzvahs. My youngest sister had hers a few years back and she ended up with something like 20 (yes, twenty) different tiffany's bracelets. So, yeah, that appears to be a safe/popular choice.

[93legendti]

If it is a good friend, I call the Mother/Father and ask them: "what does your child want?"

[crf]

If it had been a Bar Mitzvah, a foreskin would have been nice.

[ThasFACE]

If it is a good friend, I call the Mother/Father and ask them: "what does your child want?"

This suggestion makes too much sense. I advise that you ignore it.

[ti_boi]

Oh please....tree planting is sooooooooooo what your cheap auntie does and you say 'oh, that's nice'....get them a gift certificate for BORDERS Book and Music.....!! :cool:

[BarryG]

Oh please....tree planting is . . . tree planting (in Israel) was classically a euphamism for donations to the fledgling military effort, whether or not the donor realized it

[ti_boi]

I have actually looked out across those tree ranges in Israel...they are pretty cool....I didn't find the one with my 'name' on it, but then if my name was on a howitzer I guess I would have thought that was Waaaay cooler!

[Jason E]

tree planting (in Israel) was classically a euphamism for donations to the fledgling military effort, whether or not the donor realized it


Actually, tree planting (in Israel) is a euphemism for tree planting in Israel, whether or not the donor realized it.

[93legendti]

tree planting (in Israel) was classically a euphamism for donations to the fledgling military effort, whether or not the donor realized it


Ah no. As a member of a family that has donated 2 forests in Israel (Hanita and Jerusalem)--been there, saw, touched and smelled the trees; I can say that this comment is 100% false. Planting a tree in Israel is just that. You can NOT make a charitable donation to the IDF--you can to the KK"L--or JNF.

Tree planting in Israel was and is a way to reclaim the land from mere sand and make the desert/country bloom--whether it be Sde Boker, or the Gallil.

[BarryG]

I can say that this comment is 100% false.maybe now, not in the old days

[Jason E]

maybe now, not in the old days

Actually, pretty much always. Buying trees has always been a euphemism for buying trees.

[93legendti]

maybe now, not in the old days


Stop it. This is 100% false. NEVER was your statement true. I was there in 1969 for the dedication of our 50,000 tree forest in Hanita. That is almost 40 years ago--the old days, right? I have a photo of the dedication plaque and forest--do I need to dig it out and post it?

Can you post a reliable source for this opinion of yours?

http://www.jnf.org/site/PageServer?pagename=history

[PBWrench]

Here's a link to plant a tree in a Jewish National Fund forest in Israel.

http://www.jnf.org/site/PageServer?JServSessionIdr006=3r6z2dm881.app27a&pagename=trees

Also consider a wonderful book by writer Joseph Telushkin Jewish Literacy
-- she'll be glad it's on her shelf as her Jewish education (hopefully!) continues.

http://www.amazon.com/Jewish-Literacy-Important-Religion-History/dp/0688085067/sr=1-5/qid=1159552735/ref=sr_1_5/002-5635641-9477664?ie=UTF8&s=books

[djg]

Look, I think that '93 is correct, but I also think that it's neither here nor there and that we should spare our tribal visitor this mishigoss (craziness or nutiness).

The charity thing: there are both obligations and traditions of charity in Judaism, but to cut to the chase: You can do this or not, as you like, and I wouldn't bother to research an especially Jewish or Israel-centered charity on your own. There's a tradition of a donation in honor of the bar mitzvah (and more recently, bat mitzvah) on the part of the kid-no-more's family. It's not unusual for the young person him- or herself to make a donation on the day, and I've seen instances where either the young'un or the family announced a favorite charity to interested parties (on occasion, as a replacement for a gift). This sort of thing has become larger in scale and drama in recent decades. If nobody has announced a preferred charity, and you're keen to make a donation in honor of the bar/bat mitzvah, you can always inquire of the family about an appreciated beneficiary. There's also a tradition (amplified greatly in America through the 20th Century, and no doubt elsewhere) of giving nice gifts that the honored young person would enjoy him- or herself. These can be objects or money (checks or cash), the latter being a perfectly established and welcome form of gift-giving.

The bit about "chai" and life and 18: there's a sort of numerology associated with the Hebrew alphabet. The Hebrew spelling of chai (which means life--the toast, "l'chayim" meaning "to life," just like in the musical), does not spell out a Hebrew word for the number which we call, in English, "eighteen," but it's letters carry the value 18 in the numerology-like business. Recognizing the link, monetary gifts (cash, checks, bonds, what have you) frequently are given in multiples of 18, as that symbolizes a sort of toast to life.

The only catch about the money is that Orthodox (and some Conservative) Jews do not carry money on the Sabbath, so it's not a gift passed around at the time of the cermony itself, but at a non-sabbath party (maybe after sundown that evening).

[93legendti]

Look, I think that '93 is correct, but I also think that it's neither here nor there and that we should spare our tribal visitor this mishigoss (craziness or nutiness).

The charity thing: there are both obligations and traditions of charity in Judaism, but to cut to the chase: You can do this or not, as you like, and I wouldn't bother to research an especially Jewish or Israel-centered charity on your own. There's a tradition of a donation in honor of the bar mitzvah (and more recently, bat mitzvah) on the part of the kid-no-more's family. It's not unusual for the young person him- or herself to make a donation on the day, and I've seen instances where either the young'un or the family announced a favorite charity to interested parties (on occasion, as a replacement for a gift). This sort of thing has become larger in scale and drama in recent decades. If nobody has announced a preferred charity, and you're keen to make a donation in honor of the bar/bat mitzvah, you can always inquire of the family about an appreciated beneficiary. There's also a tradition (amplified greatly in America through the 20th Century, and no doubt elsewhere) of giving nice gifts that the honored young person would enjoy him- or herself. These can be objects or money (checks or cash), the latter being a perfectly established and welcome form of gift-giving.

The bit about "chai" and life and 18: there's a sort of numerology associated with the Hebrew alphabet. The Hebrew spelling of chai (which means life--the toast, "l'chayim" meaning "to life," just like in the musical), does not spell out the number which we call, in English, "eighteen," but it's letters carry the value 18 in the numerology-like business. Recognizing the link, monetary gifts (cash, checks, bonds, what have you) frequently are given in multiples of 18, as that symbolizes a sort of toast to life.
Well said.

[PBWrench]

93LT -- you might want to consider changing your handle to 90LT so that you can be a proper multiple. G'mar Chatima Tovah.

[93legendti]

93LT -- you might want to consider changing your handle to 90LT so that you can be a proper multiple. G'mar Chatima Tovah.

Gam Lecha--have an easy fast.

Well, I sold my '93LT, so I need something new anyway... :) Maybe '00RT in honor of my new to me Rapid Tour...

[PBWrench]

Or Kadimah'06 in homage to the demised theory of the big bang in Israeli politics.

[93legendti]

Or Kadimah'06 in homage to the demised theory of the big bang in Israeli politics.

Yeah, I am pretty upset about that. Arik was my hero, but Ehud, like the last Ehud that was a P.M., was (he is done) a zero.
We are going in early November to see the boys, meet some retired generals and visit spots wwhere we have made donations. I hope to ride up to the Hermon, the Gilboa, Arad and/or Mizpe Ramon. Should be cool!

[PBWrench]

I did a lot of cycling in the small crater this summer. Beautiful!!

[93legendti]

I did a lot of cycling in the small crater this summer. Beautiful!!

You know, my friend from Beeri suggested that. We are overnighting in Askelon at the SPIRIT House, (built by a local woman who fought in '48) and from there I hope to do a ride in the Small Crater area. Can you tell me more dirt/road details and suggest some other areas to ride?

[PBWrench]

I've ridden twice in the small crater and also out of Sde Boker. Each time I've ridden with a different guide and I'm happy to give you details if you're interested - PM me. You can also combine the cycling with good hiking in the crater. It helps to have a guide to get you to the right trails and also to provide the fascinating geological details. I lived in Ashkelon for a year in my youth -- near Barnea beach. Check out the malaweh in Migdal.

[catulle]

Give her a deposit on a red bike from Chester, atmo. It doesn't get any better than that.

[PBWrench]

Is a Campy cassette available in the appropriate 13 speeds for that Sachs Signature?

[H.Frank Beshear]

Guys it wouldn't be a proper post unless it got hijacked some where along the way. :beer: I'll discuss this with Shannon and see what she wants to do. I would be honored to attend with her. I have gone to some of the holiday services with a friend who visited us when I was in high school. They didn't tell his grandma he was staying with gentiles until he out of the country. We learned a lot about ourselves that year, and as hard as it is to imagine almost 30 years later we still keep in touch. Thanks for the ideas. Frank

[saab2000]

It's all greek to me. Midwestern/German/Swiss/Reformed/Lutheran...............

Educational. I read with interest 'cuz there is more out there. I grew up in a VERY small world (Floyd-like) and am always exploring the larger one. Fascinating, not threatening.

[cookieguy]

thinking back. The gift to my chums was a cross pen set. It was a dated gift 25years ago.....So much for the "good" suggestion.

Brings back good memories...they were my first real parties growing up.

[toaster]

What would Larry David do in this situation?

[Michael Katz]

You can't go wrong with a monetary gift. Parents often use the Bar/Bat Mitzvah gifts as seed money for a college education fund, a use that is thematically consistent with the tradition of learning that is part of the occasion. It also provides flexibility for the son/daughter to be encouraged to make a donation to a charity of their own choice, a process which fosters the values of giving since the kid must make an affirmative decission to give and then select the charity. This, I think, has more meaning and life value than the guest simply making a donation in the kid's name. As to a material gift, like jewelry, in my opinion not the most appropriate choice. The are plenty of other occasions when kids receive "things" as gifts. The parents can always (and often do) work out with their kid using a small portion of the gift money to buy something "special" while the bulk of the gift money is put to more meaningful use. Just my thoughts.

[davids]

The parents can always (and often do) work out with their kid using a small portion of the gift money to buy something "special" while the bulk of the gift money is put to more meaningful use. Just my thoughts.
My daughter's using some of hers to buy a bike!

[znfdl]

You can't go wrong with a monetary gift. Parents often use the Bar/Bat Mitzvah gifts as seed money for a college education fund, a use that is thematically consistent with the tradition of learning that is part of the occasion. It also provides flexibility for the son/daughter to be encouraged to make a donation to a charity of their own choice, a process which fosters the values of giving since the kid must make an affirmative decission to give and then select the charity. This, I think, has more meaning and life value than the guest simply making a donation in the kid's name. As to a material gift, like jewelry, in my opinion not the most appropriate choice. The are plenty of other occasions when kids receive "things" as gifts. The parents can always (and often do) work out with their kid using a small portion of the gift money to buy something "special" while the bulk of the gift money is put to more meaningful use. Just my thoughts.

+1, good avice

[93legendti]

What would Larry David do in this situation?

Probably insult everyone and then give the gift 2 years later-- a regifted Baby Label Maker.

[JohnS]

Am I the only Gentile around here? :confused:

[PBWrench]

Apparently so. But you are invited to fast vicariously tomorrow in support of Hebraic cyclists deprived of their GU.

[H.Frank Beshear]

Am I the only Gentile around here? :confused:

No, thats why I asked the question. :p

[JohnS]

No, thats why I asked the question. :p
Do I hear three? :D

[tch]

.

[Lincoln]

Am I the only Gentile around here? :confused:

Just move to UT, here everyone not of the predominate local faith is considered a gentile. :banana: