Punny

[William]

A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead racoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, "I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger."

:banana:

[Argos]

http://www.billrotelladrumbeatings.com/rimshot.gif

[William]

Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says, "Dam!"

:banana:

[ergott]

Two guys walk into a bar. You would think that the second guy would have ducked.

[William]

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

:banana:

[Argos]

Oh no. :crap:

You know this is going to take root a become a real long thread....

[William]

Oh no. :crap:

You know this is going to take root a become a real long thread....

Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, " I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "I'm positive."

:banana:

[Argos]

http://www.demianaiello.com.ar/weblog/images/stan.jpg

Guy's, c'mon, seriously, this is not gonna end well.

[William]

These friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most visious thug in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified they did so, --- thereby proving that only Hugh can prevent florest friars.

:banana:

[William]

Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.

:banana:

[William]

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse.

"But why?", they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."

:banana:

[William]

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him (Oh man, this is so bad, it's good)....

A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

:banana:

[William]

A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain, and they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."

:banana:

[fiamme red]

William posted ten different puns on the forum, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make us laugh. No pun in ten did. :) :p ;) :D

Whoops, that was only nine! Stole your thunder!

[ergott]

William posted ten different puns on the forum, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make us laugh. No pun in ten did. :) :p ;) :D


POTT

[William]

William posted ten different puns on the forum, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make us laugh. No pun in ten did. :) :p ;) :D

Whoops, that was only nine! Stole your thunder!

You beat me to it. ;)

William

[fiamme red]

You beat me to it. ;)

WilliamI like this elaborate, far-fetched pun-ishing humor. Thanks, William!

[bironi]

I enjoyed them all, and I usually don't like puns.

Byron

[Bradford]

Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, " I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "I'm positive."

:banana:


A neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer. When the bartender puts it down, the neutron says "how much?"

The bartender says "for you, no charge." :banana:

[William]

A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.

:banana:

A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

:banana:

[Louis]

What do you call two piers, where there should only be one? A paradox…

[tv_vt]

Ahhh, nothing like a good batch of silliness for a Friday. We should do this more often. Thank you all.

[csm]

a frog walks into a bank and asks for a $10,000 loan. the clerk, Patricia Whack, looks at him and asks for collateral, thinking he's kidding. he shows her a tiny pink ceramic pig. Patty says "surely, you must be kidding. that's not enough."
the frog tells her "yes it is. my father is mick jagger. go ask the manager."
patty gets the manager, who looks at the frog and ceramic pig and says "it's a knick-knack, patty whack, give the frog a loan, his old man's a rolling stone."

[H.Frank Beshear]

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

[Birddog]

Why were the children not allowed to see the Pirate movie?














Because it was rated ARRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHH

Birddog