we're all in this together

[Climb01742]

Last Friday in Boston it snowed almost a foot and a half. The roads have gotten really narrow. I’ve run and ridden a few times since then. (Though running outside this morning when it was -3 was stupid.) Near my house the roads are mostly two lane country roads. With all of the shoulders filled with snow, you have to run or ride on the edge of the road, kinda in a lane. Which means it is a constant delicate dance with cars.

There is a very old, narrow bridge close to my house. On Saturday morning as I approached the bridge from one direction, a pick-up with a snowplow blade on the front approached from the other direction. I slowed. The truck slowed too. I stopped just short of the bridge, stepped into a snow bank and waved the truck on. When the truck got across, I saw the driver’s face. It was a young woman, and she waved and smiled. I thought I saw a look of relief on her face. My guess is, she hasn’t been driving a plow long, and she was relieved to not have had to negotiate a very narrow bridge, a wide plow blade and a runner. Me stopping short of the bridge had not only been in my best interest, but hers too it turned out. She appreciated it too. Her smile made me feel good, because usually out on those roads, as I dance with cars, I’m usually focused on my own safety. I don’t often think about the drivers, but that woman’s face reminded me of something.

A thought has bounced around my head a lot out on those narrow roads: We’re all in this together. That’s a simple thought – maybe even simplistic -- but also a profound one. If more people acted on that thought, think how different life could be. From small moments, like riders and runners trying to share roads with cars, to big things, like politics, and race, and the economy, and wars, and people hating other people.

Selfishness is at the root of so many dumb, and sometimes dangerous, things that happen in life. It’s rare, I think, that a single thought could change so many things in life. From our morning commute to someone walking into a café wearing a vest of explosives. When a car’s bumper or mirror grazes a rider, it’s partially because the driver feels no connection whatsoever to the rider.

I’m glad I stopped before that bridge. I’m always glad when I get home safe, but I’m extra glad that at that moment, a stranger and I probably made a simultaneous realization: we’re all in this together.

[Keith A]

True words -- but how do we get this message to all those behind the wheel? I know I have taught my daughter to be mindful of all those on the road and hopefully she is more careful of other road users that aren't cars.

However, I fear we are fighting a loosing battle. As some anecdotal evidence, I have noticed a new trend (fad or whatever) amongst some of the truck drivers in my area. They are installing these super LOUD horns. There is a guy that lives near me who is in his early twenties and he has a newer big 4x4 diesel, big shinny rims and it is jacked way up. He just installed a horn that sounds just like a freight train -- I kid you not, the first time I heard it he was several streets over and I couldn't figure out what was going because there isn't a train close to us.

Then just the other day, I saw a similar type truck on the road and someone did something he didn't like and he just laid on his horn -- that thing was so LOUD it made me jump and I was quite a distance from him on my bike. So what purpose does this serve other than to scare/intimidate the other drivers and to be a major nuisance.

Climb -- I want to live in the world were people are kind and considerate of others, but I fear that for the most part this is a thing of the past :(

[Keith A]

Here you go, coming to your neighborhood soon...CANNON BALL EXPRESS™ - TRAIN HORN (http://www.wolo-mfg.com/truck.htm). It is only a measly 152 decibels :rolleyes:

Here's a few comparisons for the decibel level of this horn:
150 dB - Jet engine at 30 m
130 dB - Threshold of pain, train horn at 10 m
120 dB - Rock concert; jet aircraft taking off at 100 m

http://www.geocities.com/pansi68/trainrun.gif

[vaxn8r]

Last Saturday as I was climbing a long shallow grade, heart-a-pumping, I noticed an old '63 Volvo by the side of the road with somebody's head under the hood. I rode past then turned around and came back and asked if she needed anything. I know ZERO about cars but I did have a cell phone. She said her car caught on fire and had got that out and maybe I could help her start it.

Long story short. We fidgited with the (dual)carbs and these wires and what not (Hah! I really know nothing about this stuff) We were in a poor reception area (Chesire Oregon, if you know where that is you really know Oregon) but after 5 tries on the cell she got her message across to her friends and we got her car going and she took off, after offering me the only thing she had...a Dr. Pepper. Anyway, maybe she passes it along. I bet she thinks twice the next time she sees somebody riding down the side of the road in a "costume".

[andy mac]

Climb -- I want to live in the world were people are kind and considerate of others, but I fear that for the most part this is a thing of the past :([/QUOTE]



don't give up on mankind just yet. hopefully we'll be around for a few years to come...

[Kevan]

Keith, most communities have noise ordinance laws that should help curb such racket makers. Just what you want to get into, huh? Link-ustrate: www.lawhog.com/c/RealEstate/Neighbors%20and%20Noise%20FAQ.htm

Climb, that was a terrific reflection on those key moments when even the briefest of relationships with our fellow man…er, woman goes perfectly. I had a situation the other day that I wish I could have done better. I had dropped my daughter off at her college campus last Sunday night and on my return home, I turned left onto a major road that feeds traffic to that region of our county. It’s a simple 2 lane road, but the traffic’s fairly significant. Anyway, as my headlights’ beam swept across the road and shoulder during my turn they caught the faint outline of a cyclist riding just up ahead, traveling with no lights, just a small reflector off the back. I couldn’t tell if it was a just a kid riding after dark or a worker using the bike for commuting. It was apparent the bike was too small for the rider and the rider was so bundled-up against the cold, dressed in dark cloths on a dark night, I couldn’t tell anything about who the rider was.

At that moment I was torn. Do I offer the guy a ride? Do I yell at him? What if it’s a kid being asked by a stranger to climb into a car? What if it’s a girl? What if it’s some wacko that you don’t want in your car? All I do know is I wish I had a red-blinky light I could have reached out my car’s open window and given him.

How would you address this situation?

[Kevan]

a solution:

http://www.samash.com/images/items/j35102c.jpg

[Keith A]

don't give up on mankind just yet. hopefully we'll be around for a few years to come...Oh don't worry about that, I haven't given up...and I try and do my part in making things better on the road by stopping and helping cars/bikes in need, or letting a car go first even though I may have had the right of way, or giving a friendly wave in response to being yelled or honked at. It just saddens me to see so many going in the opposite direction. This also might be associated with the fact that the population growth in Florida is out of control and the small town atmosphere is disappearing from many parts of where I live and visit.

[JohnS]

There is a guy that lives near me who is in his early twenties and he has a newer big 4x4 diesel, big shinny rims and it is jacked way up. He just installed a horn that sounds just like a freight train -- I kid you not, the first time I heard it he was several streets over and I couldn't figure out what was going because there isn't a train close to us.

Then just the other day, I saw a similar type truck on the road and someone did something he didn't like and he just laid on his horn -- that thing was so LOUD it made me jump and I was quite a distance from him on my bike. So what purpose does this serve other than to scare/intimidate the other drivers and to be a major nuisance.:(
BIG truck,BIG tires, BIG horn. They're obviously compensating for some other SHORTcomings. :banana:

[Climb01742]

i don't think there is any "big" answer to this. not with how people drive or how nations treat each other. i think it's 5 billion small answers. this is gonna make me sound crazy, corny or both but...my dog sam passing away has really affected me. he was a far better dog than i am a person. i'm trying to live up to him, to his little dog spirit and heart. in as many small ways as i can, i'm just gonna try to be a better person. i'm making a special effort when i'm driving. let people go first. wave when someone lets me in. not get pissed when someone does something dumb. i hope that small acts of civility on the road will multiply. and i'm trying to find other places in my life to do small good things and hope they do they pebble in a pond thing.

[slowgoing]

My golden rule is ride defensively. Most people don't think they're in it together - they're in it for themselves, and I'm in their way.

[cpg]

I wish the SOB driving his or her SUV had the same "we're in it together" vibe on my Monday morning ride. They crowded me off the road and I went down. It really was a thing of beauty though. I did a text book tuck and roll and was on my feet quickly enough to see the jerk (no offense intended to our resident jerk) didn't even apply their brakes to see if I was okay. It amazes me what a little bit of snow does to people's common sense.

Curt

[Keith A]

My golden rule is ride defensively. Most people don't think they're in it together - they're in it for themselves, and I'm in their way.Exactly how I feel...I saw a license plate the other day that said "ME 1ST". But I personally do as Climb does in the hopes that one person can make a difference. Just think about how much better you feel after you have been kind to someone, compared to how you feel after you have done the opposite.

[flydhest]

Climb -- I want to live in the world were people are kind and considerate of others, but I fear that for the most part this is a thing of the past :(

Keith,

I have to disagree with this last part. The "good old days" defined however one wants, were not always that good. I'll keep selfish SUV drivers anyday if we also get to keep having women vote and work in or out of the home at their discretion, no longer have segregated bathrooms, offices, water fountains, and the like, no longer consider genocide to be part of our country's manifest destineny, or a whole litany of other attributes of our nation's past.

People were kind and considerate to people who were like them in ways that they valued. People were not better "then" (whenever that is) than they are now. Just f-ed up in a different way.

[Climb01742]

i might also argue that how each of us acts should be based on us, on our ideals and priorities, not on how other people act. i know it's not always possible, but if we let others define what is acceptable behavior, then we lose part of ourselves.

[slowgoing]

i might also argue that how each of us acts should be based on us, on our ideals and priorities, not on how other people act. i know it's not always possible, but if we let others define what is acceptable behavior, then we lose part of ourselves.

Maybe that's true in real life, but it's different on a bike where your safety is at risk. You have to respond based upon how others who have no respect for your safety act.

[Climb01742]

Maybe that's true in real life, but it's different on a bike where your safety is at risk. You have to respond based upon how others who have no respect for your safety act.

slow, you're of course right about physically protecting yourself and riding defensively. but i'm trying to react differently emotionally. let the stupid act happen, but then not get angry and scream and yell. that hurts me more.

the same when i'm driving. let the idiots drive like idiots, but i'm trying -- not always successfully -- to not react idiotically.

[Fixed]

bro i.m.h.o. there is a lot if good we can do if we just try cheers :beer:

[Dekonick]

Smile and wave - it works wonders.

Now if I can just remember to follow my own advice...

[bcm119]

Keith,

I have to disagree with this last part. The "good old days" defined however one wants, were not always that good. I'll keep selfish SUV drivers anyday if we also get to keep having women vote and work in or out of the home at their discretion, no longer have segregated bathrooms, offices, water fountains, and the like, no longer consider genocide to be part of our country's manifest destineny, or a whole litany of other attributes of our nation's past.

People were kind and considerate to people who were like them in ways that they valued. People were not better "then" (whenever that is) than they are now. Just f-ed up in a different way.

You got that right Fly. People of my generation (young!) especially seem to glorify the past, having heard/read more good things about it than bad. However, one thing I've noticed about my generation, and especially kids just coming out of college, is that they are more complacent and less willing to force changes, while simultaneously being very pessimistic about their future.

[Keith A]

flydhest -- As per subject of this message thread, the only thing that I was referring to from "in the past" was the way people interacted with each on a day to day bases and more specifically the interactions with each other on the roads we travel. IMHO, this has changed a lot over the years in a negative way.

So why can't we have all of the "advances" that you referred to and still be polite to each while driving, riding, running, etc.

[Kevan]

and poor distribution of adequate education. Thems the probs.

Mandatory (draft) 2 years for all citizens to help society. Umm...Peace Corps comes to mind. That's a start to a solution. Giving back.

[flydhest]

flydhest -- As per subject of this message thread, the only thing that I was referring to from "in the past" was the way people interacted with each on a day to day bases and more specifically the interactions with each other on the roads we travel. IMHO, this has changed a lot over the years in a negative way.

So why can't we have all of the "advances" that you referred to and still be polite to each while driving, riding, running, etc.

I guess I think the daily interactions were also only polite and considerate under certain circumstances. The day to day basis and more specifically the roads we travel were not immune from the biases and hatreds that were (and I use the past tense not to suggest that these are gone now, but only because they did exist before) such a part of the history and identity of this country. But even if they were, I suppose my point was just a reaction against the "good old days." I hope it's clear that I wasn't trying to attack you at all.

Why can't we have all of these things be good? In my view, and some will call it cynical, is that people have a huge part of them that is not good. Most people are only willing to stifle this part when it suits them or when it's for someone they see as being like them. The lines of identity have changed, to be sure, but I still think those patterns manifest themselves fairly strongly.

[weisan]

This is a tough nut to crack i.m.h.o hardly any answer we come up is completely satisfactory as it crosses into the spiritual realm but yes part of the problem AND the solution start with us cheers pals :beer:

[vaxn8r]

How do we treat each other? Well, since we all share 99.9% of our DNA you could fairly say we are literally all brothers and sisters. So how de we treat our families?

Don't get me started on the PC definition of "family". The whole "it takes a village" thing makes sense only if it starts at home with a loving, nurturing, respectful environment, hopefully with two parents and hopefully one at home. Take the "home" out of the equation and the village can't do a whole lot. We're faced with detachment and selfishness.

[Fixed]

bro amen cheers :beer:

[Keith A]

vaxn8r - Well said and I agree with you 100%

[Cadence230]

I used to go to The Northshore Mountainbike forum which is mostly made up of Canadians. There was a post by a guy one day who wanted advice for a torn ligament or something to that effect for a finger injury he sustained while riding. The advice he was soliciting was along the lines of therapy or rehab for the injured finger. Some folks chimed in with various remedies and excercises and one person posted, and I paraphrase here, said: "Why don't you just go to the hospital?" Well, the Canadians enjoy socialized medicine and I assume it's a free visit. The original guy posted that "I don't want to take resources away from others who might need it more because after all I recieved my injury doing something frivolous". I thought to myself "Holy cow!" this guy, and maybe their society at large, is willing to forego gain in order for a stranger to perhaps get help. I also think about the "It takes a village" dealio. Ya know?

[Frankwurst]

Treat people the way you would like to be treated yourself. That's the way my parents raised me and sometimes I get kicked in the b**ls but I sleep good at night. The world is full of good people and I'm not going to let the bad ones rain on my life, it ain't a dress rehersal, I have one shot at it and when the curtain closes, I'd like to think I did it right. :beer: