Can you help me with my Lance Armstrong song?

[bthornt]

I hope you can help me complete my song about the Lance Armstrong affair. Because I have no musical talent, it's sung to the tune (like all the songs I make up) of the Ballad of Jed Clampett, otherwise known as the theme song to the Beverly Hillbillies TV show.

Come and listen to my story 'bout a man named Lance,
famous bike rider who got in Sheryl's pants
Then it was discovered he was usin' P.E.D.s,
so he went on Oprah's show, beggin' on his knees

That's all I got. Can you add anything?

[Charles M]

No no... Do it to the queen song

We will we will ,drop you!

Buddy you ride clean, make a small noise
Riding on the street gonna take on lance some day
He'll put mud on your face,
Make you the disgrace
Kickin you kind all over the place...

:fight:

[davidlee]

dope that is, black gold , TEXAS TEA

[bthornt]

or maybe

dope that is, EPO, TEXAS tea

[dekindy]

How about including the part where cancer cells invaded his brain and sex organs and he had radioactive materials introduced into his body to get rid of them. Also include the part about how the writer and singers of this song live in glass houses and should not throw rocks.

[bthornt]

OK, do you want me to add it before or after the parts where he cheated, ruined lives, bullied people, ...

[jpw]

No no... Do it to the queen song

We will we will ,drop you!

Buddy you ride clean, make a small noise
Riding on the street gonna take on lance some day
He'll put mud on your face,
Make you the disgrace
Kickin you kind all over the place...

:fight:

We will, we will, drug you!